Difficult to find Mr. Right?

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The_Patriot
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by The_Patriot »

Yareey wrote:
Ismahan123 wrote:Yareey is talking out of her arse. :lol: :lol:
I beg your pardon, Why would u as a educated woman need an educated man?

Succesful ladies need to understand that an educated man wants a yes woman, and we should make the best of what the market is offering.

Aslong he is sweet and can cook and clean. He is my man :clap:
so in other words the guy should not be the head of the family or the role model?
I guy that only provides sexual pleasure and household chores while you provide everything including decisions?
Shakadhan walaga horeye ee African Americans have tested its fruits thats why most families are dysfunctional.

Yareeye so your Ideal partner is a Yes man?

Funny thing is when you said your sister will provide also for the role model, so will your sister be married to your husband?

all I see is a dominatrix
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by Murax »

Nin gartiis waa inu qaato. In being unbiased, some of these gabdho are right. from what I've observed most of us Somali Men are failures. Between qaad, not working, not going to school, acting like You're still 16 years old when You're a grown ass man, etc. I have relatives that have married niman Muslim ah, who are non somali and Mashallah its worked out great and they handle their responsibilities like a man, etc.. Meanwhile You'll see a Faarax marry a girl and split before she even delivers the baby. Yes, Somali girls have their share of hoodrats, dissapointments, etc. but really they're far less in number then the Somali dudes. I do and always have encouraged Somali girls to marry any dude they find suitable regardless of race as long as they have some Religious restraint, morals, and has his stuff together.
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by The_Patriot »

Murax wrote:Nin gartiis waa inu qaato. In being unbiased, some of these gabdho are right. from what I've observed most of us Somali Men are failures. Between qaad, not working, not going to school, acting like You're still 16 years old when You're a grown ass man, etc. I have relatives that have married niman Muslim ah, who are non somali and Mashallah its worked out great and they handle their responsibilities like a man, etc.. Meanwhile You'll see a Faarax marry a girl and split before she even delivers the baby. Yes, Somali girls have their share of hoodrats, dissapointments, etc. but really they're far less in number then the Somali dudes. I do and always have encouraged Somali girls to marry any dude they find suitable regardless of race as long as they have some Religious restraint, morals, and has his stuff together.
I do agree with everything apart from your last sentence which I oppose.

Cos you are simply asking them to take a risk, you simply cannot just marry someone of another race cos he seems to be religous? what do you define by religious?
mean going to the mosque? having long beard and Isbaal?

Marriage ge is not a simple topic/vacation and proper check should be done to ensure that you are not going to get tied to a wolf in sheep clothing.

But at times sanity is overcome by blind love and its only allah can protect you.
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by Murax »

Patriot,

A girl marrying from the same or different race doesn't increase or decrease the success of the marriage. If the Guy is a bum he's a bum, and if He's qof macquul, then waa qof macquul ah. On a personal level, I cannot see Myself with anyone other then a Somali. I remember this one Xabashi girl Muslim I met in class I wanted to marry. At the end of the day, it just wasn't possible and even her family went bizzerk and started trying to marry her off to all sorts of xabashi dudes out of state, and My Mom almost had a heart attack at the possibility. As I look back I don't know what I was thinkin and cannot imagine myself marrying a Non Somali. However thats my preference, but in observing Somali dudes and seeing how many of us are living I encourage all Somali girls to marry anyone decent, they find a match with as long as He's Muslim. We have no right to tell a girl to turn anyone down and stay unmarried.
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by The_Patriot »

Murax wrote:Patriot,

A girl marrying from the same or different race doesn't increase or decrease the success of the marriage. If the Guy is a bum he's a bum, and if He's qof macquul, then waa qof macquul ah. On a personal level, I cannot see Myself with anyone other then a Somali. I remember this one Xabashi girl Muslim I met in class I wanted to marry. At the end of the day, it just wasn't possible and even her family went bizzerk and started trying to marry her off to all sorts of xabashi dudes out of state, and My Mom almost had a heart attack at the possibility. As I look back I don't know what I was thinkin and cannot imagine myself marrying a Non Somali. However thats my preference, but in observing Somali dudes and seeing how many of us are living I encourage all Somali girls to marry anyone decent, they find a match with as long as He's Muslim. We have no right to tell a girl to turn anyone down and stay unmarried.
dude I am not being racist but it seems like you are not logical. all you are doing is changing the situation from a frying pan into the fire.
What you are implying is that all Faraxs are potentialy useless while all ajnabi are potentialy good cos they are an opportunity to exploit.
What i am simply stating is let sanity dictate.

Thus to have a successful marriage is to lower the risk since the risk of farax is known and the ajnabi is unknown are you trying to convince us that as long as he says akhi he is an angel?
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by Murax »

loooooooooooooooool@ Patriot.

No, bro that is not what I am saying at all. I'm not saying Non Somalis are good or bad, and I do agree if both candidates are the same the non somali and the somali at least marry the Somali. With the Somali at least You have more options to potentially save the marriage incase it has problems, and there is a familiarity level. With Ajanabi its like they don't owe the girl anything. I'm not by any means encouraging it, or telling girls to rush into it however We have to be real and examine all possibilities. I'm talking about the girl's maslaxad because its not like she can just go and get a guy. Not only does she have to find the right guy but that guy has to be interested in her, and make the first move and pursue her and who knows what the probability of all that happening is. You have to look at things from both sides.
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by xoogSADE14 »

Call me old school but it would be extremely difficult for me to bless the marriage of a female relative of mine and a foreigner. I odn't even think I could go through with it.
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by The_Patriot »

Murax wrote:loooooooooooooooool@ Patriot.

No, bro that is not what I am saying at all. I'm not saying Non Somalis are good or bad, and I do agree if both candidates are the same the non somali and the somali at least marry the Somali. With the Somali at least You have more options to potentially save the marriage incase it has problems, and there is a familiarity level. With Ajanabi its like they don't owe the girl anything. I'm not by any means encouraging it, or telling girls to rush into it however We have to be real and examine all possibilities. I'm talking about the girl's maslaxad because its not like she can just go and get a guy. Not only does she have to find the right guy but that guy has to be interested in her, and make the first move and pursue her and who knows what the probability of all that happening is. You have to look at things from both sides.

All I can say is marriage is a gamble hedged with supplications to Allah seeking it to blossom.
Thus I will want was is good for my sister to apply to the rest. I woulndt want her to settle for an unknown risk. I mean we are not an Island right? basically if a xalimo finds faraxs in one area repulsive why not look for another in another area. Its not that the block you live in is the whole world. If I was not impressed with xalimos in my town I would look for another in another region and definatly will be in a spirit of lowering risk.
But the moment an ajnabi comes into question its more of a pandora box. In life behaviour is dictated by how you can overcome tribulations and seems Islam is a way of life then it would be wiser to stick to a Xalimo especialy in the west.
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by Yareey »

The_Patriot wrote:
Yareey wrote:
Ismahan123 wrote:Yareey is talking out of her arse. :lol: :lol:
I beg your pardon, Why would u as a educated woman need an educated man?

Succesful ladies need to understand that an educated man wants a yes woman, and we should make the best of what the market is offering.

Aslong he is sweet and can cook and clean. He is my man :clap:
so in other words the guy should not be the head of the family or the role model?I guy that only provides sexual pleasure and household chores while you provide everything including decisions?Shakadhan walaga horeye ee African Americans have tested its fruits thats why most families are dysfunctional.

Yareeye so your Ideal partner is a Yes man?

Funny thing is when you said your sister will provide also for the role model, so will your sister be married to your husband?

all I see is a dominatrix
sxb your funny

Who said anything about being the head of a family or being a role model ama who please who :o

No my ideal partner is not a yes man, but he doesnt have to be a doctor or lawyer too

What I said is if he is working, none jaad eating somali guy that I connect with and he is willing to help around the house then we are cool. If I want expensive thing I get it my self. And you make decisions together, thats what makes a marriage.
We all know that your brother have a hard time, we got 4 options.

1) Stay single
2) Leave education demands, lookin for other thing in somali dudes like beauty, deen, loyalty ect
3) Marry a somali educated man who has another woman :down:
4) Try your luck with other races

I choose option 2 :lol:
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by Enlightened~Sista »

Most of the girls I know who are still single even though they r approaching their late twenties( some even in their thirties!) are girls who believe it's their religious obligation to be anti-social towards their Somali brothers.


All talk even the pleasantries is considered haraam and a gateway to adultery!

We are ignoring the Elephant in the room,the fact that there is hardly no interaction even though there are opportunities available to meet and talk ..people fail to seize it and before you know it they are thirtysomething and desperately trawling the internet for potential spouses.
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by The_Patriot »

sxb your funny

Who said anything about being the head of a family or being a role model ama who please who

No my ideal partner is not a yes man, but he doesnt have to be a doctor or lawyer too

What I said is if he is working, none jaad eating somali guy that I connect with and he is willing to help around the house then we are cool. If I want expensive thing I get it my self. And you make decisions together, thats what makes a marriage.
We all know that your brother have a hard time, we got 4 options.1) Stay single
2) Leave education demands, lookin for other thing in somali dudes like beauty, deen, loyalty ect
3) Marry a somali educated man who has another woman
4) Try your luck with other races

I choose option 2 Yareey
I get you comments but then got lost please elaborate on who is getting a hard time?

lastly who told you that men come in only those packages? Thomas cook or?
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by The_Patriot »

Enlightened~Sista wrote:Most of the girls I know who are still single even though they r approaching their late twenties( some even in their thirties!) are girls who believe it's their religious obligation to be anti-social towards their Somali brothers.


All talk even the pleasantries is considered haraam and a gateway to adultery!

We are ignoring the Elephant in the room,the fact that there is hardly no interaction even though there are opportunities available to meet and talk ..people fail to seize it and before you know it they are thirtysomething and desperately trawling the internet for potential spouses.
No Interaction? the interactions are alot I mean with the boom of Shisha joints all the aroos, xaflad, uni events, islamic events etc....

I do believe is we should stop setting high bars and lower it to a reasonable level.

But life is truely dicatated by qadar we are just having a debate and no one answer is the solution but logic should prevail.
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by Ayeeyo Xilwa »

Enlightened~Sista wrote:Most of the girls I know who are still single even though they r approaching their late twenties( some even in their thirties!) are girls who believe it's their religious obligation to be anti-social towards their Somali brothers.


All talk even the pleasantries is considered haraam and a gateway to adultery!

We are ignoring the Elephant in the room,the fact that there is hardly no interaction even though there are opportunities available to meet and talk ..people fail to seize it and before you know it they are thirtysomething and desperately trawling the internet for potential spouses.
You mean dating.


Prophet peace be upon him (pbuh) said,
“Surely, you will follow the ways of those nations who were before you, in everything as one arrow resembles another, (i.e. just like them), so much so that even if they entered a hole of a sand-lizard, you would enter it.”
They said, “O Allaah’s Messenger! Do you mean to say that we will follow the Jews and the Christians?”
The Prophet (pbuh) replied, “Whom else?” (By meaning the Jew and Christians)
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by Enlightened~Sista »

The Patriot,

those who go to clubs are not looking for marriage are they?


Helwaa..that hadith is not relevant to this discussion.I'm not saying we follow other ppl's dhaqan and cadaat..let's go BACK TO OUR OWN, back in Somalia a girl who is in her late twenties/thirties who is unmarried and without children is UNHEARD of. Attractive or Unattractive they all get married and have a couple of kids by that age. That is because they are not awkward when dealing with men..don't push ahadith in other ppl's faces, don't shut themselves off in their homes etc etc. They totally lack the ''haraam! haraam! fitnah! ' attitude which you and Patriot, Surrender, Nobleman display.
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Re: Difficult to find Mr. Right?

Post by Enlightened~Sista »

Where is Universal Channel when you need it :cry:

They had an interesting interview with this Wuqooyi man..basically a tutorial on the ways of the old, anyone watched it?? I would highly recommend it to the above people and anyone who has the same mindset! :up:
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