Why Somali marriages dont last

[Sumubaridi]

They fail for different reasons and the desire to get divorced increase with more kids. Men don't have sabar when the woman get overwhelmed.

[Rambie]

If only I were 10 years younger

Bet I just described u Aisha.

[TheLoFather]

Horta why soomaalis all act like divorce is some sinful, abomnible and evil act?!!!!..it is NOT!,
I can understand it is emotional, stressfull and traumatic experience for all concerned at the time and I understand somefind it hard to get over it and for some it take a long time to get over it and get their life back on rack.
But what we must realize is that divorce is perfectly natural and reasonable cause of action as a last resolt for a man and a women whose marriage has reach the dead end for whatever reason. If the pair had lost respect and kala danbeeyn for each other there is nothing better for them than an amicable divorce. Even when children are involved. Soomaalidii hore waxeey odhan jireen markey is furaan " RAXAMADI FURAN".
No one can make a couple stay together when they've had enough of each other, no matter what anyone does( you know the saying you can take the horse to the water but you can not make/force it to drink.).

I think the main concern of the Somali community, families etc... should be how to help, support and guide throught the process to ease the emotional pain that the couple might.experience and also hepl support and guide them to recover them selves and start a fresh and in case of the children, to help the couple to come to solutions that are best for the children but also both are happy with in terms of custody and the fathers involvement in raising the children.

I think it is more reasonable to put more effort in the aftermath instead of endless debates on why it happens. A couple can do everything perfect in terms off avoiding divorce with all the help from family freinds community even the military lol, but sometimes shit just happens.
And when shit happens it is the "cleaning" process that should be THE priority for all concerned.





If divorce was such an abominable cause of action Allah SWT would have made it Xaraaam.


WA BILLAAH TAWFIIIQ.

[lifeisbloodyhard]

Horta why soomaalis all act like divorce is some sinful, abomnible and evil act?!!!!..it is NOT!,
I can understand it is emotional, stressfull and traumatic experience for all concerned at the time and I understand somefind it hard to get over it and for some it take a long time to get over it and get their life back on rack.
But what we must realize is that divorce is perfectly natural and reasonable cause of action as a last resolt for a man and a women whose marriage has reach the dead end for whatever reason. If the pair had lost respect and kala danbeeyn for each other there is nothing better for them than an amicable divorce. Even when children are involved. Soomaalidii hore waxeey odhan jireen markey is furaan " RAXAMADI FURAN".
No one can make a couple stay together when they've had enough of each other, no matter what anyone does( you know the saying you can take the horse to the water but you can not make/force it to drink.).

I think the main concern of the Somali community, families etc... should be how to help, support and guide throught the process to ease the emotional pain that the couple might.experience and also hepl support and guide them to recover them selves and start a fresh and in case of the children, to help the couple to come to solutions that are best for the children but also both are happy with in terms of custody and the fathers involvement in raising the children.

I think it is more reasonable to put more effort in the aftermath instead of endless debates on why it happens. A couple can do everything perfect in terms off avoiding divorce with all the help from family freinds community even the military lol, but sometimes shit just happens.
And when shit happens it is the "cleaning" process that should be THE priority for all concerned.





If divorce was such an abominable cause of action Allah SWT would have made it Xaraaam.


WA BILLAAH TAWFIIIQ.

Well said. Never been married but I don't think you need to be Einstein to know what you said.

One other thing, never stay together for the kids. What kind of a marriage is that? If you're staying together for the kids, it's likely that you are not even sleeping together anymore. It would be a depressing marriage - maybe even in the clinical sense. You both deserve happiness and kids know when something isn't right and when their parents aren't happy. They might even ask 'why are you sad mummy?' etc. Plus, you're giving them the wrong idea of marriage. You're making it look negative. It's better to part ways amicably. The father can still see the kids and should. Where there is a will, there is a way.Another thing I don't like is when the one parent badmouths the other in front of the kids when the other is absent. He is bad to you. You're looking at it subjectively. Maybe you're being unreasonable and he is not as bad as you think he is or not bad at all. Just let the bloody children decide for themselves when they are older. It also confuses the kids.

[X.Playa]

1- Naagta soomaali oo kacsi hayo oo rabta Guzz "xalaal" ah.

2- Ninka Soomaali oo isagu raba not sex but inu beesha-badiyo ( to have as much as little snotty nosed army for his clan and eventual pension fund).

3- Jacayl digaag khayaali ah , how? ----> most women will go for a man with either money, car, house, degree, and pretend its love and finally when she faces the reality of " till death do you apart broke" she calls 911 and claim the child benefit and the housing for herself and goes off in screwing spree with a four by four and four kids and forty pounds on her back.

4- the boring reality of marriage vs their free life before marriage. once the $10k wedding is over and inviting her girlfriends and chooisng this and that , once all the superficial silly girlly adventure is finished , remember most Somali women prepare their entire life for these silly things, the marriage goes into slow death throws.

and finally the entire Somali marriage institution is called " wasmo xalaal ah" they seek it just to enjoy sex , so its no wonder once she orgasam and once the beardo mullah cum, one whistles the other smokes in bed and wonder where is the door at.

I myself have a girlfriend and a decent dog. that's enough for me. those sort of relationships last longer then all the xalaal somali wasmo combined.