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How do we Date If we are Somalian Men

SomaliNet Forum (Archive): General Discusions: Archive (May 2000 - August 2000): How do we Date If we are Somalian Men
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Oyaaye

Wednesday, June 28, 2000 - 01:49 am
Salam To my all brothers and Sisters.

After Salan. Obvioulsy Iam a Somalian Man who has being around in the Western world 4 a while. Personally I have Dated a NONE SOMALIAN women from different colour and differen type of ethnic background. That was then. Now Iam changed man. (alhamdulilaah)ALLAH has guided me to the right path and alot of things that I use to percieve as being right now is wrong. Since I don't date a none the foreign woman anymore and I still have the desire 4 women but NOT for any type of woman but my own kind of woman. Iam confused really confused why?. coz I don't know where to begine from. Iam sure there alot of you out there who feel the same way as I do. to make it warst all most my current friends have type of relationship.

Now I need advice I mean SERIOUS ADVICE from all you who is cabaple of giving me something to think about. remember the somalian saying of "Caqliga kaa maqan walaalka uu ku jira" Then I believe that.

P.S Negative suggestions pls don't be too hursh if it's unavoidable .Thank you

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simplymo

Wednesday, June 28, 2000 - 04:01 am
_Shit happens bro....

simplymo

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Amaani

Wednesday, June 28, 2000 - 05:25 am
Dear oyaaye,
Serious advice coming you way.
Since i am a female, i would tell you what a serious somali girl would expect from you when you aproach her, i dont speak for all them , but i speak in the name of the ones that agree with these terms.
If you want to date seriously .. approach a girl with unltimate respect. Not only that but it should be in the right place at the right time.
Many guys would approach a girl at the wrong place/time for eg. when her mother is infront of her ...or when she is around so many people she knows ( if its in a wedding).What will you expect ..ofcourse she will tell you to get lost.
My advice .... wait ..a girl will come your way from anywhere. While at work or at the mall or anywhere.If its meant to be ... then its meant to be.
You dont have to do like gaalada.
Dont search and hit on every girl you see, just to see if you are lucky to hit the jackpot with her or not. Remember, with utlimate disrespect.
Never tell a girl that hardly saw you " aan isbarano " ..thats bad bad bad bad ..trust me. invite her to coffee ...be her friend first, the key word "friendship". If you gain her trust, then inshallah things will go your way.
Remember we are hard to get, thats why ,,,, be yourself and let her like you just the way you were the first day you met.If you change later then thats when bad bad bad bad comes in to place again.She will see a stranger.
Good luck bro.
I hope i was of any use.

Salaam.

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Sheikh Shariif

Wednesday, June 28, 2000 - 08:15 am
Oyaaye

Brother go to minisota, Columbus ohio,,,jidka ayeey daadsan yihiin taad rabtaad la kacee.
good luck.

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Jeego

Wednesday, June 28, 2000 - 12:02 pm
Amaani

now I know what to say somali woman in the west
Use English and never say "aan Isbarano" acceptable ''Frienshib" thanks your valuable advice I am not in to politics I only want to increase my Stock!!

talking about Non-somali woman onething never let me down is "lets get to know = Aan isbarano.

Amazing world, what works for one world doesn't work for other. but I am gratful for the advice. any more advice will be appreciated.

Oyaaye don't come back to us (Somali) we are coming to you!!

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doctor

Wednesday, June 28, 2000 - 12:23 pm
oyaaye....tips..on how to date somali girls!

Rule #1 loose that name!.."oyaaye"..whats that
a Zulu chief?
Rule #2 learn the skills of tollerance,somali girls are nothing like all those cheap nonsomali girls.I mean they dont sleep with you!
Rule#3take a note book and write down your priorities.Do u need to settle or play indian and cowboy games.If you want to settle then,its easy as abc...somali girls are lining up!
Rule#4 say the word " beenee beenee !!!
Rule#5 aint not rule # 5.......just...use deaodrant!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol!

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TheRebornMan

Wednesday, June 28, 2000 - 03:13 pm
Bro, oyaaye..that girl, Amaani gave you some valuable info,bro..walaahi, its all true...follow that...
And since i share some common points with you, i mean, i used to be like that..now i am a reborn bro, after i tasted somalian finest girls, i realized this is where the golden juice is.

But, in addition to Amaani advise, i like to add a point you must..must must use and practise.
i mean, if u got together with a somalian girl..and u lucky enough to hit the skin, don't be running around like a rabbit, yelling out loud and telling all your friends your dealings with her behind the closed doors...if u do that, Walaahi, you will be hit by a immengous baseball bat on the head and the lower part, you would never get closer to any skin at all in that region she is

And be cool..don't be trying to impress her with fast fancy cars,cell phones, and all those bullshit like some losers do..but, instead, make sure she gets the best servicing when you 2 are alone...just u and her..nice tinted colored light,slow music,flowers,read her a poem,give her a feet massage,put your fingers in her hair and massage her skull,pick up her favorite movie and let her watch while you holding her...cook for her, play with her, make her laugh, treat her good...and..and..most importanlty..make love to her..only..only..and only if she wants it way more than you do...if she aint into it, damnn...then just visit the bathroom, and do some "finger workout" thinking to yourself that there is always tommorrow.


aight, bro...more than that u will have to get an appointment and bring some cash

peace

TheRebornMan

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Amaani

Thursday, June 29, 2000 - 10:11 am
to TheRebornman:

If you call yourself real born, Were you worst than this before? .. i cant even imagine worse than that ... ina-lilaah .. bro i hope you mean when you marry the girl.
I think you forgot to add that into your comment.

Salaam.

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TheRebornMan

Thursday, June 29, 2000 - 06:11 pm
hey, amaani, what's up sis! common, i am giving the bro some additional advice. why u think i was worse. I wasn't. I was just giving the best of me to other non-somali chicks...i thought that ain't fair...i got end up with one of my somalian girls.
by the way, the non-somali girls are too "glue", i f u know what i mean. You show a lil of good stuff, and they go like i am a lil somalian cute babe from you.damnnn...

anywazzz..don't be thinking its wrong to express your feelings..i just do that.

TheRebornMan

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Oyaye

Sunday, July 02, 2000 - 09:00 pm
Thanks all for your ADVICE I realy Liked it and most of all gained knowledge about it.

Speciall thanks to my sister "Amani" you are the man.

Mr "Reborn" thanks too my bro even though u were a bit of the track.

"Doctor" way of the track my friend If I wanted slung way of finding a sister I wouldn't be asking you.

Thanks you all again. Thank u Thank u Thank u

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Amaani

Monday, July 03, 2000 - 07:33 pm
jeego and oyaaye
You welcome brothers , if you need more advice, i will pleased to give it to you.
And you are right jeego ..plants might survive on earth but they might die in mars. It can work with people but might not work with others, simpply because they are raised in a different enviroment.

Salaam to all

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MN man

Wednesday, July 05, 2000 - 04:34 pm
Shiekh Sharif

Reer badiyey waaxid, how can u say something like that. Mn Girls Toronto girls who lost respect on them selfes. Ka fiirso waxaad leedahay.

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BAKAYLE SR

Friday, July 07, 2000 - 07:44 am
ooyaaye,

saxiibayaaloow ninkaan in aad u jilcisaan ayey aheed. marka hore. faxyaasha labay ukala baxaan mid waa fax rabaayadaysan midna waa fax duureed
tan rabaayadaysan sheekada waxaad oga bilaawdaa
S/ macalimada maxaa isugu kaa dhacaayo?
then waxay ku dhehee waa lafaayaa ka dibna waxaad galaysaan gabay iyo geed kawareegasho kadibna dhakac dhakac kadibna nacash ka dibna

tan duureedka ahna waxaa samaynee sidii orgi qooqan oo waad inaad u cidaa markay kuu jawaabtana waxaa tiraahdaa naa ma open baad tahay mise close

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xamardaye

Saturday, July 08, 2000 - 12:55 am
foori, iljabis,baaq iyo faraha oo laga hadlo ayaa la isugu daraa,haddii ay ka jawaabto,waa bacda, waa qashta, waa lagu dhacaa.

haddii ay ka jawaabi weeyso way yara edban tahay, xishood baa ku jiro taasi waa loo yara ilka cadeeyaa ,qosol beenaad, iyo indhaha oo aan laga leexin ayaa la isugu daraa, waa guur doon, salaaxid,af macaan iyo u seex seexasho ayeey wax ku leedahay, ka dib waa ku adiga.
MIYAANAN KUU SHEEGIN WAX KU ANFACO?
nabad iyo caano

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Anonymous

Saturday, July 08, 2000 - 02:23 pm
MR REBORNMAN .. you want like it if someone did that to your sister give the brother a good advaice i think he need to settel down .. and what with the movise and the hair and finger's you watch too much tv .. and ooyaaye all i can say is respect respect all what we need is that and love and to be treated good.

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Oyaaye

Sunday, July 09, 2000 - 09:42 pm
To XmarDaye and Bakeeyle.

Sxbyaal what are u talking about, Walaahi that wasn't helpfull. what "DOOLA CADEYN & SEEX SEEXASHO" You seem to be confused, actually confusing me. But never the less thanks all I appreacita.

Bro "Anynomouse" I understand where you coming from and how beatiful being respected is and also respecting others. But sxb Iam respecting others so, are they. And I don't think sharing my feelings with others which I beleieve is bothering me is NOT disrespecting. Iam in my late teens and abviously need help about dating my own kind. I thank you too .


Being in Australia is like hell these who are I said I will tell you about where live know about this. Iam talking interms of dating cause we are few here and the few are far away from each other 4 alot of different reasonson. If I mention I will say "Clanisim" well you might say he's lying but these who live here know about it and you can come see 4 your self but it's the major 1 that is killing us. But the sisters I think understand that too as young generation we don't give "HEK" about who's is who but the parents I think tells us all about this and actually bombere us with. I personally will not like a grl 4 her clan neither refuse her that will apoling and an awful thing to do in my oponion. and I think alot of you out there will agree with me. So I hope a sister in DOWN UNDER will see this and the brothers + all of you out there regardless of what you are and where you at I will say your oponion about this and hopefully will give some way(s) to deal with this kind of situation.

Thank you all.

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SWEETIE

Wednesday, July 12, 2000 - 08:54 am
to sheikh shariff who gave u that name or title first?.secondly.u are full of •••• to say women in mn/ohio are all over the streets.read the statement first and understand the guy is asking 4 advice not a reference.To oyaaye my advice is 1/ approach the woman in a friendly manner get to know her thro general conversation like her hobbies,education,friends,past-relationship, why she broke up with her exxxxs,family background ,principles, relate them to yours.After winning her confidence ask her out to a movie,and slowby slow open your feeling to her.Ask what she likes in a relationship?And assure her that you are not going to do anything against her will, that when she says no, her no will be respected.Dont ever pressure her for sex everytime u meet her.BE VERY PERSUASIVE,HONEST AND DEDICATED,SAY THE THRUTH,KEEP TIME,SHOW HER YOUR TRUE PERSONALITY,GIVE HER YOUR NUMBERS TELEPHONES...SHEDULES CALL HER ANYTIME U GET A CHANCE,EXPRESS UR FEELING TO HER SO THAT SHE CAN TRUST U INTRODUCE HER TO UR FEMALE FRIENDS IF U HAVE ANY,BUY HER CARDS TO SHOW HOW MUCH U CARE.tAKE HER FOR A WALK ,PICNIC,GIVE HER A GOOD HUG..rESPECT HER FRIENDS,FAMILY.STOP GOING BY WHAT UR TOLD. BELIEVE IN WHAT SHE TELLS U THAN ANYBODY ELSE TELLS U.TAKE HER AS UR BEST FRIEND THAN JUST THE RELATION.GIVE HER SOME SPACE IN THE CONVERSATION,BE A GOOD LISTNER.AVOID TALKING NEGATIVE ABOUT UR PAST RELATIONSHIP,OR TOO MUCH ABOUT URSELF AND ALSO RESPECT HER PRIVACY THIS IS FROM MY OWN POINT OF VIEW SO GOOD LUCK

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aquaansis

Wednesday, July 12, 2000 - 01:18 pm
oyaye somalis men are not suppose to date.Heard the concept of marriage?Please stay the right path

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Yusef

Friday, July 14, 2000 - 06:04 am
This is just comments,

I suprised reading this messages wallaahi!! because i didn't know that there was a different life style those who live in Europe and you guys on the other side of the ocean!
to meet someone who is well educated and diintana ku dheer is not difficult to find it if you really want to meet her! we have meetings on the college and universities around The Netherlands, Germany, Belgium and Den mark! that is the way i found the most interesting women i ever saw wallaahi adiim and i love her very much. the most wel educated somali women do not need money or car or something like that like xamaalis do!! dont get me wrong!! it is a way of understanding each other, self respect, communication etc..

good luck brother

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AHA

Friday, July 14, 2000 - 08:05 am
Those boys & Girls are giving you a theoritical advice and they are avoiding to tell you, how long you can be nice, honest, diplomatic, giving presents for your chosen girl. If they do not tell you what return you will get when you provide all this services. you will simply go back your old routes. "dating none somalis"

This is your best advice you can get from me. do not be westrenized by saying "how do I date these somalian girls" Just simply go one of your close relatives or your biological parents to hoke you up nice girl. And teach your life style. What you eat, when to go socializing, your personal attitudes and what behaviour you might accept for your relationship. Remember, There is no difference between somalian girls.From Raas-gaanbooni till Raas-caseyr. The difference is how they dress. If they do not behave well simply she does not adore you and you must warne her or you make move.

AHA

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sweetie

Monday, July 17, 2000 - 10:45 am
This is a message to bro by the name AHA, The more you give the more you get

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Dunya

Monday, July 17, 2000 - 08:21 pm
Dear oyaaye,

I understand where you are coming from, australia is more like a city i have lived in.
There are very less somalies which makes you a minority and families would prefare living in peace and the only way thay avoid conflicts(clanism) is by staying with the same clan or family. With no outsiders.
I would just advice you with one thing.
Your problem is not the dating matter .You dont need to read a book to learn how to love, it comes naturally and there is nothing like it.
Your only problem is your enviroment.
Why dont you change it .
If your hungry for fish, go to the a sea where there is a school of fish swimming by.
Why dont you travel , to any country where somalies are in huge numbers. Like london, canada.
You will find people whom will appreciate you for who you are, because they no longer feel threatened by any clan related laws. Nowadays , its uncivilised to be discriminating. This is your green light.
You just need to play your cards right.
Treat woman like you want to be treated and you will get what you want and deserve.
May Allah guide you .

Salaam

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T-GIRL

Tuesday, July 18, 2000 - 02:10 am
OYAYE....SALAAN

If I give U a little insight into the WOMANS world.. We like to be taken seriously. We like to get to know UR personality whereas some somali guys don't have the patience to express themselves. If U want to get to know a Lady..... respect her, be a gentleman.....what U portray will reflect on your abilities as a man with brains. Don't try to overly impress her as well... in other words..don't be a YES man. Have an opinion...share your point of view... afterall dating is like a CV....Or a resume if U may of selling yourself. Be honest and sweet....I guarantee they will FLOCK in and U might need me to help U with all that FE-MAIL..LOL...

PEACE
TROUBLE

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ABDI

Tuesday, July 18, 2000 - 04:16 am
LISTEN BRO..
1 MEET HER ONLY WHEN SHE IS ALONE
2 GET PHONE NO
3 PHONE AND MEET FOR SOMETHING FUN, AND CHAT
4 THEN DECIDE HOW U WANT THE RELATIONSHIP TO BE
5 IF U JUST WANT FUN, THEN GO WITH OTHER NATIONALS GIRLS
6 BUT IF U WANT MARRIAGE THEN ASK HER WHEN TIME IS MOST APPROPRIATE.
PEACE & LOVE

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Bilaal

Tuesday, July 18, 2000 - 07:29 am
In the name of Allaah, the beneficent, the most merciful..

my dear respected bro and sis--
asalaamu alaykum ...

To:::-oyaaye

Dear bro first alhamdu lilaah that you reborn agian this in Umah again.

Second i think, the advice that sis "amaani" gave to ya, don't take it cause it is the same like kuff'ar bro....

if we are real muslim we have to distinguished from kuff'ar bro beleive me..

invating' a muslim woman to caffee that is not the style of ummah bro...

i would tell ya how to do it cause i used to be just like ya alhamdu lilaah. God gaide me to the right path bro..

1:== start to study the qura and sunna
2:== if ya want to marry a muslima woman
go to their parents and ask them for her hand
if they say to ya "talk to her" then it is permissable to talk to her and make agreement bro

3:== don't say let us go to caffee or somewhere else like kuff'a do bro
i think ya can reach an agreement if ya real serious abut what ya are sayin' bro and it would help ya later when ya married bro

if ya married a girl with religion caracter ya'll success bro...

but before ya do all those ya have to make some adjusment bro..


wabilaahi towfiiq ...
asalaamu calaykum bro

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Anonymous

Tuesday, July 18, 2000 - 09:57 pm
we dont

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yasmin

Thursday, July 20, 2000 - 05:31 pm
to oyaaye

anaa inta kuu jooge
ee balan noo qobo it is a date lol
e-mail me yasmiiny@yahoo.com

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DaGrlNextDoor

Saturday, July 22, 2000 - 10:44 pm
Bilaal that's wonderfull advice you gave and it's the Muslim way to go about...but what if this guy or me for example don't wanna marry anyone but just wanna go out and have an intelligent converstion with the opposite sex without marriage or having someone else present(like relative).

Ayeeyo...i'm sure alot of girls won't agree with me but.#1. I hate flowers(they are just 2 sweet)
#2. Don't be 2 attentive let the girl do her thing, like she used to, don't do everything for her.
#3. Let her want you 2, make sure you guys are on the same page before the second date(don't let her take advantage of you kindness)
#4. Don't call her or be on her face 24/7 let her came to you on social gatherings.one the other hand surprise her once in while with something sweet and you know she will love. Pay attention to her need.
#5. Don't talk about you past, don't ask her about her past. This is a new start for the both of you.
#6. Make sure you are confident and intelligent enough to be with her(and she should be luck your talking to her)
#7. MAKE SURE YOU RESPECT HER WHATEVER THE OUT COME MIGHT BE. AND SHE RESPECTS YOU TOO.and be honest.
#8. I'M NOT GONNA TALK ABOUT SEX BECAUSE I'M SO AGAINTS SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE.

A GUY HAVE NO RESPECT FOR ME IF HE ASK ME FOR SEX WHILE WE ARE DATING...AND I WOULD LOSE HIM SO FAST.


and i'm not Hard Cord...it's just what i would want my guy to be...SWEET but MANLY

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Oyaaye

Sunday, July 23, 2000 - 08:49 pm
Well what a story U guys gave me, waaw I was impressed seriously.

Brother Yusuf, I understand where u coming from. I will make sure to take your advice in to my "Saving account".

Sister "Sweeti"

I do Rake my affairs sreiously and personally beleive me. Any other thing u will like to controbute.

Sister "TGRL" WHAT did u say "Don't be a what, yes guy" now there u go again, a typical somali sister. when things get tight u complian and if the guy is nice then he officially becomes "Nacas" Right?

Brother "ABDI" well that was fair advice, accept where u pointed out whethere I want "Gaabsi ama Guur" in my xariirkeyga. I will never ever run over a somali sister with this type of fullness Xiriir.but u made your point wisely, thanks my brother.

To my Brother "Bilaal" May allah reward u with good deeds for your advice, Iam on my way regarding to your advice seriously, infact I started understanding my religion Prior to you "Advice" Thnk u so much.

My Sister "Yaasmin". Are u seriously in Australia?. and do u realy think we have a chance, well I might come your home ask your dad about u, don't so negative about with even knowing alot about it's consequences, it may work.what do u say? lol. Don't have a Hear attack,I will email u soon sis.

To "DaGrlNext" loooooooooooool u r carzy and funny but NOT that funy. 1st all my name ain't "Ayeeyo" it's "Oyaaye" pleas diffrentiate. Hint: use the somali/english dictionary.Flatering with my Opposite sex is not my oponion at all. all I want to do is get a discent sister with < requirement. and what do u mean "Make sure u are the same page...." lol. I don't think I will be at the "index page" and her being at the "Introduction page". Any thing else u haven't covered, cause u seem to be "Ayeeyo" for your self. Just kidding my dear sister thanks 4 your contrabution I appreciate.

All of you I hope understood in human, normal way, instead of thinking an alcoholic, drug edicted, brain washed by western world. My story was real with no joke what so ever, mind you it was 4 real people too. which seemed to me they are around all.

all the Best Oyaaye

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T-GIRL

Wednesday, July 26, 2000 - 06:50 am
OYAAYE....

Don't be 2 sweet.....Try sweet and Sour.... Aight All I said was have a freaking opinion CAPISHE....

CIAO
TROUBLE

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Oyaaye

Unrecorded Date
Ok I will take that in to account.

Miss T.

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