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WHEN IS THE RIGHT TIME FOR A MAN TO MARRY

SomaliNet Forum (Archive): Ila Qosol - Jokes: Archive (August 2000): WHEN IS THE RIGHT TIME FOR A MAN TO MARRY
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FARIID (Public user)

Unrecorded Date
waad salaamantihiin:
I'm 25 yrd old and I'm quit and happy to be single
However, my family and friends keep pressuring me and telling me that I should get married before it is "TOO LATE". this couse me to lose my control, and change my behavior special when I see woman.
I never had girlfriend and never been in LOVE, but I want to. I try to find a person whom I feel specail connection with, and share a wonderfull time, but my parants push me to get marreid soon.
I don't want to get married without knowing each other at lest a year, but my family told me that they have nice girl for me: BRO and SIS, the problem is when is the good time for a man to marry, how I take my time to have girlfriend, and to feel a love, and how can I get my family to see that I'm ready for marriage? PLS give your the best advice.
thank you
Fariid

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Ciir (Public user)

Unrecorded Date
Salaamu Calaykum

Fariid waa salaaman tahay. Aboo waa aqriyey qoraalkaaga marka inaad single life jeceshahay war cad waaye, laakiin ha u guursan just because familyka aa rabo inaad guursato. Maxa dhacay beri ka maalin guurkaaga waxa laga yaabaa inuu dhibaatooyin badan keeno waayo...
1. Ma rabtid, diyaarna uma tihid guur
2. Gabadha ma jeclid, familyka aa kuu keenay

Ma hadhowti markuu xaalku xumaado furiin aa ku ordee. Maxaa dhacay marka la dhahana jawaabta waa taqaan ay ila tahay. Waxaa lee dahay gabadhaan familyka aa igu qasbay ee ani ma rabin. Sheekadaan oo kale tu cusub maahin. Marka hadhow intaa familyka eeda saari laheed waxa roon inaad adiga gabadha kensato hadhow haduu guurkiina dirqi galana labadiina lee eeda isa saartaan and not familyka.

ps: Qoraalkaaga dhinaca kale keen inta qosol lee waaye.

Amaano allah iyo amaano rasuul

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Sister (Public user)

Unrecorded Date
Fariid, since you posted your message under the jokes --- ila qosol page. I think you will be ready for marriage when it is no more a joke!!:-)

As long as the whole idea is funny, don't get married. Enjoy your life. Marriage is a HUGE RESPONSIBILITY.

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Asad (Public user)

Unrecorded Date
My bro. fariid, this is your'e chance JUST DO IT as you will do it later...and one more thing I hope she is pretty, and inteligent.

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HAJI (Public user)

Unrecorded Date
Fariid, Bro for my side for this story, I agree a SISTER, and I am saying again, Enjoy your life Marriage is a huge responsibility, don't listen your family, do what you supposed to do, I believe you should wait until you get a RIGHT GIRL, and RIGHT TIME. and remember it is not easy to get MISS RIGHT so shop around before too late..

PS..This is my idea you don't have to agree with me..


GOD BLESS DOOBABKA.. hahaa..AAMIIN soo dhaha

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Getthesteping (Public user)

Unrecorded Date
get the stepping boy

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KAMAALL (Public user)

Unrecorded Date
to fariiid:

saaxiib salaamad :

marka hore waxaan filayaa inaad fahmi karto af somaaligan marka labaad ingrisi yaan ku qoraya :
marka saddexaad waa tan taladaydii:
kuwa kula diid abbo iyo hooyo way edeb daran yihiin waa waxa rogay dhalinyaro badan oo u badna hablo kuna riday inay qaadan dhibaatoyin la yaableh sidii u ka gabyey gaariye oo ah shaacir soomaliyeed ama heestii caanka ahayd ee " ceesaantiii dherektey orgiga isu dhiibtee la dhawaaqdey baan ahy" saaxiib heestu ama gbaygu ama sida diinteenu tidhi sinada ama waxa la dhaho /la yiraahdo " saaxibad" waa wax aan macno lahayn oo aan shahwad kaa binayn, adiga iyo gabadha aad la tumanysaana dhib iyo cuduro u keeni kara. anigu ma ihi nin diinta aad u yaqaan, laakiin waayo arag isu arka. waalidkaa dhib kulama jecla ee wanaag ayay kula rabaan. hadii aanad guursan karin hadda oo aadan diyaar u ahyn u sheeg si quman iyana ha irdhayn adna ha ka dhicin haadaan, mida kale guur xili kasta oo aad diyaar u tahay asaad tahy qaangaadh isla markaana aad tahy mudakar " majure" wuu haboon yahay. ha dhegesan kuwa niyad jabsan ee silica iyo xumaynta hablaha ku nool ama hablaha iyagu habowsan ee kulah kuna andacoonaya " marriage is a responsiblity" taasi waa dhab laakiin waan ka baqayaa oo guur ma rabo ee sinno yaan rabaa ayay qarsnayaan hadaba anigu waxan kugula talin lahaa hadii aad rabtid guur haw daymalaan haddii aanad awoodin si quman ug sheeg waalidkaa. gabdha lagu siinayo haday ku rabto adigu tasho oo ma awooda. laakiin dheg how dhigin kuwa liita oo raba inaad lunto

bye kamaall

my dear:
there was a saying in which i saw some where " all that glitters is not gold" those people who advising you to reject your family is silly and ignorat . your family- mother and father- ARE the most HUMAN BEING who love you and want your future to be bright and happy. if you cannot handle thier proposal for marriage tell them you cannot hundle and i think it is best idea to suggest that you want to be majure about life. on the other hand, there is no excat time when a person has to marry.
only when you are majure enough to handle a life, it could be 15year or 50 years of age. marriage is best when you are young and majure. PLEASE DONT LISTEN THOSE WHO ARE LAUGHING YOU AND SAYING GET GIRL FRIEND,. THEY LIKE YOUR PAIN AND DISASTER. SO LISTEN YOUR PARENT AND MARRY THAT GIRL IF YOU CAN , OTHERWISE TELL YOUR FAMILLY THAT YOU CANNOT MARRY THIS TIME WITH OUT MAKING THEM ANGRY.

BYEEE THANKS AND GOOD LUCK

KAMAALL

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Anonymous

Unrecorded Date
The answer of the topic is:
When you find the right person and you're over 18!
But you guys sound desprate!
You will know when is time to get married by the first time you see the right person for you.
Good luck to you all and be positive.
p.s. "Iimanka hala sukto"

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Ayan (Public user)

Unrecorded Date
To: Kamaal

Bro you are giving the worst advise the brother ^ you should advise him better then this. ! don't just look because anyone else is saying refuse that matter of course he has to !! cuz it will not work tomorrow for him!!

If he married someone he has no feeling ! than means anytime or any minute their marriage could end!! so don't just look what is happening today think what will happne tomorrow.
I do agree with you to except all the time your parents!! but his parents are not the one who will married this girl!! how ever marriege is a seriouse business !!!!! for both man and women!!

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Ayan (Public user)

Unrecorded Date
To: Fariid
Fariid greating frist of all, and second are you seriouse?!! come on you allready have your decision and you know what you want in life!!?

If you think that is right girl for you go for it!!! but if you have a doubt!! don't mess up her life !!! after all this is a family thing!!! so relax think !! and just be a reall man!!! ask yourself is this what I want ? and if you heart say yes!! then !! follow your heart!! I hope you fine way out !!!
Remember bro this is only my beleive you don't have to agree with me..
till then take care and good luck!!!!!!

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Idilphotmail.com (Public user)

Unrecorded Date
to: Fariid

The most prevelant kinds of marriages that I have witnessed are either full of passion and very expensive shows only to end in a a short time (although some do last for years) and arranged marriages that either fail because of lack of interest, or flourish because day by day the marriage is watered and the true love, respect, trust and companionship and grows like a beautiful flower. However, because of your religion and culture which opposes looking at or being in compromising positions with the opposite sex and your moral obligation to follow your parents wishes, I think you may be missing out if you didn't give the girl a chance. After all your parents love you much and only want the best for you. I honestly believe that they have done their best to find the most decent girl available. If you commit to marriage, it doesn't mean you have to accomplish it immmediately. Remember, no one can make the choice for you, the decision is ultimately yours. Good Courage

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Salma (Public user)

Unrecorded Date
hi fariid how are you?
well the thing is are you ready for it? don't listen to your parents when it comes for relationships all they want is a grand children (lol)

The right time is when you got the right girl in your dreams or your soulmate. And you got the right place and the right time.
Being a single is not bad and hey you still young for a guy. 25 is not bad age try to educate your self and beleive me you will see the girl coming right into your arms.

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Saxarla (Public user)

Unrecorded Date
salam dear Fariid
First off bro I know there are manny diffrent openions and advices...but dispite the diffrences you are the one to choise what is right for you any how my advice is:

well you are not a kid ...and if you did`t have a girlfriend or fell in love it only shows you are a person with respect to his muslim sisters, and there is no need to change that now. However if love is what you are looking for than you should think what is the end of love would it be a happy marige or a broken heart, so you need to prebare yourself mentaly that inshaAllah if you find a good sister you will marry her not only weste her time. Second do you even know the girl that your parents were telling you about ??? well if you don`t than bro give yourself a chance of knowing her maybe she is the ONE ..who knows....
you can just tell your parents you need to know her first without any commitments make sure famileis are not involved at first and try your luck Bro.
If you don`t like her than your parents will see you did your best, and IshaAllah will respect your dicition.
As far as knowing a girl for a year is concerned than that could be done by engagement that is if you are serios about her. Engagement is not marriage and is not a serios commitment so could be broken if problems accur .....

Love I don`t know bro is there such a thing, or is it only infactuation that fades a way after few years. one in evry two marriages fail in the West and the avarage of all marriages is six years ..Although those ppl claim they are in love and knew each other for at least a year not if for ten years..
Any how Bro I think its more Combatibility, mutual respect, understanding,communication and ofcourse ALOT chemistry(i.e physical attraction). That is recipe for a great marriage so GOOD LUCk bro I pray for you that Allah shows you the way...
I hope I offended no one with may ideas I respect the fact that some ppl might not agree with me however this is only my bleif :> :> :>

P.S pray Istikhara it is of great help in such cases.

Wasalam
saxarla

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Suhuur

Unrecorded Date
to fariid
this what my advice to you is
fist fo all before I start I want say I'm so proud of you and your respect for us somalian sisters you seem like a really nice guy who truly respects the wishes of his parents .
but in this case the choice is yours I would first like to say your ready for a merriage when you accept It's reabonsability so infact any time is the right for merriage , and this girl your parents are choosing for you could be the one don't forget that she feels as trapped as you are because she really doesn't know you either .I think you should give it a chance for your sake , your parents and most of all the girl for she could be your dream come true. if you do that and you get to know the girl you still don't like then you gave the girl a fair chance you given yourself a fair chance and you don't let down your parents for they only want what's best for you and that way you don't live your life worrying about what might have been.as far as love goes you can find love in anyone don't forget she could the one you been waiting for all your life,
I hope get you what you want out of life ,good luck on your discision.Think long and before you say No!Because it sould change the course of your life.

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SOUTHPARK FAN

Unrecorded Date
DEAR FARIID
SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR PROBLEM. I THINK YOUR RIGHT YOU NEED TO KNOW WHAT LOVE IS ALL ABOUT AND WHAT IT IS LIKE TO BE IN LOVE BEFORE YOU GET MARRIED. MARRIAGE IS A LIFE LONG COMMITTMENT AND MUST BE DONE FOR LOVE AND NOT BECAUSE PEOPLE EXPECT YOU TO GET MARRIED BECAUSE THEN IT WON'T BE A HAPPY MARRIAGE.

GOOD LUCK ON YOUR SEARCH.

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SUSAN

Unrecorded Date
HEY BRO O THINK ABOUT MARRIAGE IT'S CUZ IS BORING AND I'M FEMALE, TRUST I'VE THERE.AND I THINK YOU SHOULD WAIT A WHILE AND DATE ALOT OF GIRLS OK. AND YOUR STILL YOUNG AND HOPEFUL SEXY RIGHT.
ENJOY LIFE AND HAVE FUN AND DON'T DO THE SAME THING THAT I DID WHICH WAS RUSHING INTO MARRIAGE CUZ THE PRESSURE THAT I RECEIVE FROM MY FAMILY, SO PLZ BRO LIFE IS SHORT SO ENJOY IT WHILE IT LASTEST OK.

LOVE FROM SUSAN

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single sista

Unrecorded Date
my brotha...are u gay??

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Ahmad

Unrecorded Date
Asalama Alaykum ALL!

TO: Fariid!

Brother, don't let others pressure you---you will know when you know. When the time comes for you to get married, you will NOTICE it, big time!

...untill then, block your ears from the whisperings of others`. Marriage is special and wonderful...and blessing...and heaven on earth. And, the best news is, it CAN be without LOVE, at first!!!WHATEVER you do, don't screw it up for yourself...by being pressured by others(...or lust) into it. TAKE your time! :-)


p.s. Listen to your day---without the murmors of others(this shall be a clue!)


Blessed BE!

Peace, Ahmad!

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Taibah

Unrecorded Date
Fariid
You say u want to fall in love and marry someone u love, that's not necessarly a bad thing.But when two ppl are in love they tend to be blind of each othere's character flaws. It's not untill after they're married they see each other for what they realy are.
"Love is what u make it and who u make it with"

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MUNIIRA¤

Unrecorded Date
DEar love
If you can´t find the right person , then you must be blind.Because I be looking for a men like you
in many , so dear write me back .

Iam looking forward hearing from you
your faithlully

MUNIIRA

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Yasmin

Unrecorded Date
dear fariid,

Hi. i hope ur ok. i read ur letter and think that you should wait till you find the right girl. there are a lot somalian peopel getting divorced and this is coz they didnt marry out of a choice.you should listen to your parents, after all they know best. tell your family that you are not ready for a marriage as it is a HUGE responsibilities. have you heard the saying GUUR WAA CALAF. so i would suggest that you finish your education and just waite for the right right girl to come along, she is out there waiting for. by the way why dont you give this girl ur parents wants u to marry , u dont have to marry her straight away. get to know her firs. who knows she might be the one for you. GOOD LUCK.

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sucaadhassan

Unrecorded Date
dear farrid,
I think you should follow your heart and take your time, make be best wise choise u can!
good luck!
byeeeeee suad ,sunny, rahma!

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BILGEYR

Unrecorded Date
TO: FARIID

ABOWE IGA GUDOON SALAAN AY ISKU DIRAN WIIL IYO WALAASHIIS. SALAAN KADIB NINYAHOW THOSE BRO'S AND SISTERS GAVE YOU THE ANSWER YOU WERE LOOKING FOR. AND KNOW I WANT ASK YOU THIS SINCE IT'S BEEN COUPLE MONTH AND I KNOW YOU SEEM TO BE A SMART FELLA WHY DON'T YOU TELL US THE WAY YOU WANT YOUR LIFE WITH THE PARENT'S WAY OR YOUR WAY STILL SEARCHING FOR THE RIGHT PERSON. OR YOU FOUND HER IF NOT WHAT CAN I DO TO HELP BECAUSE I MYSELF HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM AND MY PROBLEM IS LITTLE DIFERENT MY CASE I'M 20 AND I HAVE BEEN ASK OUT A LOT.GUYS FALL IN LOVE WITH ME AND MY FAMILY AND FARIENDS THINK BEFORE IS TOO LATE I SHOULD GET MARRIED BUT I NEVER FOUND MR RIGHT. MYBE WE COULD HELP EACH OTHER. I KNOW THAT OUR SISTERS AND BROTHERS GAVE YOU ADVICE DUT I'M AFRIED TO WRITE MY OWN CALM SO HELP ME AND GIVE ME ADVICE.
LOVE AND PEACE.

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ubax

Unrecorded Date
DEAR FARIID


I was told by my grandmother: Love came after marriage. That is if you are a truth mulism. brother I have read what everyone have said, and from my understand you need help....but the only you can do is ask allah for help, we human can't help but we can give you an advis or opinion right? for I would said: give this girl a chance to get know here, talk to her, you don't know if the same thing is happene to her. Life is full of life, so don't waste your time or hers. I would said marriage is choics. My younger sister is marry and am not. Coz i choics to, my parents always ask me when am going to get marry but i know when i meet the right person, at the right time i will get marry. 25 is young age for male so take your time. All I can said is give this girl a chances to get know her and who knows something might actully came out from that. just know that you don't have to love someone to get marry to. Coz LOVE will came soon or later. wish all the best

your sister ubax

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Maimuna

Unrecorded Date
Dear Farid.
Bro. I am 20 years old and i am getting married in 2months. I have been with me love for 3 years and we both think its time for us to get married.
The think is, if you find the right person, its never too late or too early to get married. Just take you time and follow you heart not your parents. I think you are a nice sweet man and with find the queen of you heart. take care bro and all the best to you.

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