     NADIRA | Tuesday, February 20, 2001 - 10:55 am
HELLO THANKS FOR READING MY DIALOG BROS AND SIS PLZ TELL IF THIS IS WRONG OR IF I'M WRONG WHY I CAN'T MARRY A BLACK GUY SHOULD I RUN AWAY WITH HIM OR SHOULD TELL MY FAMILY ABOUT IT CUZ I KNOW THEY WON'T ACEPT US THIS IS MY LIFE AND WE LOVE EACH OTHER SO BAD ALSO HIS MUSLIM. PLZ HELP BE SHOULD I GO FOR THE FAMILY OR FOR MY LIFE THE WAY I WANT? HELP HELP I NEED THE VERY BEST ADVICE. THANKS. NADIRA |
| SOMALIAN-N-PROUD | Tuesday, February 20, 2001 - 11:05 am
you should be killed....if you even put that sh*t in your mind...if you was my daughter i would of killed you...and somali girls who think like you should be killed traditionally......all i have to say is dump the black nigga and merry yourself a nice somali thug nigga who can hit that ••••..why you wanna give it to a black nigga and not a somali nigga let the somali niggazz hit that •••• they can make your ass feal good you know what am sayin peace |
| Jaale | Tuesday, February 20, 2001 - 11:37 am
This reminds me a story that happen in Italy: A somali girl did fall in love with so called old Muslim Italian guy, and maried him. She used say Somalian men do not know how respect the girls, how to love, this and that. After few month she became pregnant, and the old fellow run away from her, she didn't know where to look for and what to do to find him(because gaal qaraabo ma lehee). She was seen saying:My god, if he was somalian, at least i would have known his familly and clan,so it would have been easy to find him(too late).
My opinion. Little girl, your family know you and they also know what is good for you. If you think your family wouldn't like the black guy you were talking about dump him (he is what you think). If you think your family would welcome your idea go for it.
Sorry! if i didn't sugest what you wanted.
Bro Jaale |
| NADIRA | Tuesday, February 20, 2001 - 11:53 am
JAALE THANKS THAT'S A GOOD ADVICE I'M HERE ONLY TO HEAR THE RIGHT THINGS AND YOUR WORDS ARE RELY TOUCHABLE THIS IS A REAL STORY I'M ALSO THE ONLY GIRL IN THE FAMILY DON'T HAVE A SISTA TO TALK TO TO LOVE SOMETIMES MAKES YOU DO ANYTHING ALSO I'M NOT A BAD GIRL I'M JUST HERE TO HEAR THE SIDE OF MY SOMALIAN GUYS ANS GIRL AND EVERYONE'S OPINION COUNTS. THANKS JAALE AGAIN. NADIRA |
| MAANA | Tuesday, February 20, 2001 - 02:56 pm
TO NADIRA:
Sista i know how you feeling...but let me tell you something. The black men that you love is MUSLIM, and that is very very good thing you guys having the same religion. However, you and him have totally different culture thinK about it..different lanquage..
MEN COME AND GO
BUT FAMILY DON'T
SO STAY IN YOUR FAMILY AND MARRY SOMEONE THAT YOUR FAMILY O.K WITH........
GOOD LUCK |
| Anonymous | Tuesday, February 20, 2001 - 03:13 pm
all of you sould be honor killed, stupids.
my name is hodan and i love Sirgay |
| KILLA | Tuesday, February 20, 2001 - 04:37 pm
NADIRA IF YOU CAN'T TELL YOUR FAMILY KILL YOUR SELF THAT IS MY IDEA WHALAEY. PEACE
KILLA, |
| somali-jecel | Tuesday, February 20, 2001 - 08:50 pm
to somalida!
intaan ka jawaabin arinta nadira,waxaan jeclahay
inaan arintaan iraahdo.waxaa jirta in maalmahaan
dad ajnabi ah ee isticmaalaan somali net,iyagoo
bogaan ku qoraan figradooda;iyagoo miisamaya caqliga somalida iyo figradooda.waxaan cadeeyn u
haayaa in wiilal badan oo school kayga ee xataa
ii sheegeninay galan chat ka somali net.anyway
waxaa u samaxa af english ka aan ku qorno.
hadaan u soo noqdo nadira i think hada ayaad
fursad haysataa,waxaa ka baqaa inaad noqotid
sida gabar aan aqaan oo sandkii hore gursatay
wiil ganbian ah intuu cunug ka dhalay ayuu ka tagay.hadii aad qisadeed rabtid kala xariir somalida sydney.waxaa ku soo gaba gabeeynaa
somalida wax tiraa intaadan falin ka fiirso.
peace to my ppl
and love you |
| NADIRA | Wednesday, February 21, 2001 - 08:33 am
MANA THANKS SISTA, EVERYONE'S OPINION COUNTS SO YOURS IS THE BEST.
LET ME COME BACK TO KILLA HEY KILL YOU KNOW I WON'T EVEN TRYING TO BOTHER U BUT U KNOW WHAT I AIN'T GONNA KILL MY SELF FOR NO REASON ALRIGHT SO BABY IF U WANT TO GIVE ME ADVICE U AND HODAN THAT WOULD BE EVEN BETTER BUT PLZ THIS IS SERIOUS AND NO NEED TO INSULT ME OKAY SO KEEP IT CLEAN. TO BROTHER SOMALI-JECEL,WALLAL THANKS FOR UR CONCERN I WOULD BE HAPPY IF I CAN WRITE SOMALI WRITINGS BUT IT'S NOT MY FAULT SO ANYWAY WAAD MAHAD SAANTAHAY. TO ALL OF YOU GIVING THE VERY BEST ADVICE THANKS AND MAY ALLAH BLESS YOU ALL.NADIRA |
| Butterfly | Wednesday, February 21, 2001 - 09:39 am
C'mon guys the sis asked u guys an advice not a insulting.
Nadiira:
sis this is my advice if the guys is Muslim that's all matter. I know u guys don't have the same culture but hey he is muslim.I mean now and days there is alot of somalian bros who is up there. And don't follow their religion. If i said am Muslim and don't follow it what Allah told me to do.Is that gonna work? Anyways all i have to say is sis if the guy loves u and u love him too and he is muslim go 4it.Tell ur family to accept him cuz they should of knows it better i mean how can they say u can't married a some1 who is muslim just cuz he doesn't have the same culture as u.I hope my that 'll hope u good luck sis
Peace&lov to all of ya |
| Murtsal | Wednesday, February 21, 2001 - 09:40 am
To: Nadira,
Allow me to put my two cents in, marriage is a very sacred and very serious matter, you have to think thoroughly before you make a decision that you might regret, therefore, my advice to you is to take your time, and weigh your options between having the acceptance & the blessings of your parents and pleasing someone. Finally, I will second with what was preciously said "family is forever".
good luck to you and may Allah guide you find the right choice. |
| HANGMAN | Wednesday, February 21, 2001 - 10:19 am
I EXPERINCE ALOT ABOUT THIS SITUAYION. SO MY ADVICE IS TO LISTERN TO YOUR PARENT : IF THEY SAW A NO THEN YOU SHOULDN'T MARRY HIM. THERE ARE ALOT SOMALIA GUYS OUT THEREE FOR YOU . SO DON'Y BLOW YOUR CHANCE. ALWAYS YOUR MOUTHE KNOW WHAT IS GOOD FOR YOU. SO LISTER TO ME ADVICE AND I HOPE YOU TAKE IT. |
| HELPIN_SISTA | Wednesday, February 21, 2001 - 10:42 am
TO NADIRA
WALLAL ITS A GOOD THING IF HE IS MUSLIM BUT THERE ARE OTHER THINGS U'LL DISAGREE WITH LIKE CULTURAL DIFFERENCES IF U DO RUN AWAY WITH HIM OR MARRY HIM FOR THAT MATTER.
HE MIGHT BE LOVEABLE AT FIRST BUT ONCE U REALLY GET TO KNOW A PERSON U MIGHT REGRET IT AFTERWARDS, SO I ADVICE U TO TELL UR PARENTS AND TO CONVINCE THEM AND SHOW THEM HIS GOOD SIDE.
IF THEY DISAGREE WITH IT AT FIRST THEN TRY EVEN HARDER TO CONVINCE THEM.ONCE THEY SEE THAT UR ARE KEEN ON THIS MAN THEY WILL GRADUALLY COME ROUND!!
I SERIOUSLY HOPE THAT THIS WILL HELP
GOOD LUCK & TAKE CARE AND U KNOW WHAT THEY SAY LOVE DOES CONQUER ALL
PEACE! |
| Shrink | Wednesday, February 21, 2001 - 10:44 am
sister Nadira, luv is something u can't suppress or just ignore. But it should also be pure and open. Only in the absence of the secrecy in your relationship will you discover if your love for this guy will be returned. When the exciting bit is gone six months down the road, and I can assure you it will, will he stand by your side and fight armies for you? Or will there be another exciting gal for him? Ask urself these realistic but unpleasant questions. There is the possibility of your family disowning you, but it's only Allah who should feared. Come out of the closet and test your man's love for you. |
| NADIRA | Wednesday, February 21, 2001 - 12:17 pm
MURSAL, HANGMAN, SISTA, AND SHRINK. I'M KIND PUTING YOUR ADVICES IN MY RECORD AND MAKING IT RELEALISTIC SO BROS AND SIS YOU GUYS R MAKING ME MY FEAR OF CHANGE TO BE COME TRUE REALY THI IS ONE OF HELL THINGS THAT REALY MAKE U SICK THIS PERSON REALLY LOVES YOU AND I'M LIKE SOFT PERSON IS NOT THAT I DONT HAVE A HATER FOR MY PPL I LOVE MY PPL BUT WHY WHEN U MEET SOMEONE JUST LIKE A PERSON SO HONEST WITH, AND IF I TELL HIM OH I CAN'T DO THIS CUZ OF MY FAMILY, OH THIS WILL REALY HURT SO BAD. THANKS GUYS I REALY LIKE TO HAVE YOU AS FRIENDS ON THE NET.LOVE NADIRA |
| JUST HEAR ME OUT AIGHT!! | Wednesday, February 21, 2001 - 01:32 pm
TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN TO@@
You are all forgettting the main point here. Just because he is African American, does that mean she can't marry him? What makes think that she will be happy with a Somalian guy? Just because someone is with in the same race as you doesn't mean that they will be right one for you. Sister i am not going to encourage you to marry this man however, listen to your heart. You and only you know what is best for you. IF he is a good muslim, and you two love each other, I really don't see the problem. There are a lot of mixed marriages in this world, you won't be the first to marry outside of your race, nor are you are the first. The people who are advising you are telling you that you should discrimanate, and they call themselves A muslim? Okay although I may not know much about the religion, but isn't Being a muslim knowing that Allah created all of us, and no one is above the other. The religion Islam has no certain race, age, sex, anyone can become a muslim regarldess of their parents, or where they were born. Know this as well, that Islam is something you practice, and if you don't practice it then you shouldn't call yourself a muslim. Islam is not something that is given to you, it is something you must seek, and understand, and live by! Obey the rules of Islam! I really expected more then this from a nation that call themselves muslim, ooh my Allah, Somalis we are not better then anyone, and If this men loves this women, and he is Muslim it will be a xalaal marraige.
Now about the culture boundaries:
There are going to be culture clashes, however as time goes by you will both adapt some how. There are things that you will never understand about his culture, and sometimes you will feel frustrated, and there will be things that he won't understand as well, but the main point is that you try to learn from one another, and make a strong fondation for your children!! Your family maybe mad at this moment, but they should come to the relization that the gentelmen is A GOOD muslim, and he makes you happy, and he is what you want so there for I think they will forgive you, and let you live your life. IF they really ABANDED you because of this then I say well, it's their loss, because you are not doing anything wrong!! I wish you the best of luck with your life whether you choose to marry this man or not, just remeber this that you only have one life to live!!
For those of you who think that I am married, or am in a mixed relationship, I just want to stop you right there cause I am not!!! I love my somali men, but if I was to fall in love with another Muslim brother who wasn't Somali then I would definatly go for it!!!
Jaw beelas!! |
| Amina | Wednesday, February 21, 2001 - 04:07 pm
Nadiira, sweety I know what your going through coz some one very close 2 me is married 2 a non-somali muslim. Its great that he is muslim. And as muslims we are all the same - somali or not.
My only concern is getting married without your parents consent... And can you really sacrifice your family for a man (any man), what happens if your marriege does not work out??? You lose both your family and your man!!
Sis, i ain't trying tell you what to do.. couse i think your smart enough to do the right thing... My only advice is be patient and try your best to convince your parents, may be if they got to know him they may grow to like him.
I know it is YOUR Life... but don'r forget that your parents gave their lifes up just for you.. from the moment you were born their lifes revovled arround ya... and every parent looks forward to the day their baby becomes and adult and gets married.... can you see why they are so concerned. I know our parents are out of order sometimes.... But they always have your best interest in mind... They may be wrong but its because they care.
I'll shut up now couse i think, i am just confusing you even more (sorry)
Good luck with what ever you decide to do!
And make dua
Peace, Love and Happiness |
| mohamedweli | Wednesday, February 21, 2001 - 04:16 pm
choose a man or u r familY??
common, did you know if your mom and dad are not happy with you then you cant never go to heaven!!! SOMALIS WE ARE ALL FORGOTING WE R MUSLIN... wath hapen to respecting waaalid???
Nadira walaal, I pray for you and 4 all off our sisters and brothers whose loosing their religion and culture. trust me LUV CAN BE FOUND BUT, FAMILY CANNOT NEVER BE REPLACED SO... dont choose a MAN from your family. BUTTERFLY man let me ask u a question, do you have a SISTER? and would you let her marry an African-American???
do these pple have a morale??? religion? culture???? think about it. I know luv is blind sister but, DONT THINK WITH YOUR HEART, instead use u r Head????? we all love you sister and I pray to allah for you that u do the wright thing??????
Nadira walaal, is the guy nation of islam muslim or a normal muslim?
luv moweli |
| liibaan | Thursday, February 22, 2001 - 01:19 am
Hi sister Nadira,
The man is of your religion but is he a decent and dependable person? Does he love and respect you as you do? Is he serious and sincere about your relation? Is he a man who is ready to shoulder the responsibility of raising kids and family? If the answers for these questions is "YES", go for him. Try to convince your family. The consent of your family is very important. We always need the blessing and support of our family. We owe them a lot. Don't forget that our parents (family) always wish the best for us (for their children). Understand their concern. It is fact there are some foreign men more responsible and ALLAH fearing than our brothers. I understand your situation is like walking on a tight-rope. Keep your identity, tradition, dignity, Faith (Islam). Try to accommodate the good part of the culture of your husband, as well. Take your time and please try your best to win the heart of your parents before getting into any final commitment. Be strong and seek the advice of also your best friends and family members. Marriage is a sacred communion. Make sure that your home has a happy start. Don't rush on it. I wish I could be of more help.
MAY ALLAH GUIDE YOU AND SHOW YOU THE RIGHT PATH AND DECISION IN YOUR LIFE.
Cheers |
| BRO. M.C | Thursday, February 22, 2001 - 06:18 am
TO Maxamedweli & the rest of bro/sis who agrees with his comments, about parents!
WHEN YOU SAY THIS WHAT DID YOU MEAN?
common, did you know if your mom and dad are not happy with you then you cant never go to heaven!!! SOMALIS WE ARE ALL FORGOTING WE R MUSLIN...
I KNOW YOUR SENTENCE IS PARTIALLY TRUE, BUT DOES THAT MEAN EVEN IF YOUR PARENTS TELLS YOU TO DO WRONG THING "brake the rules of Islam" AND YOU DISAGREE WITH THEM YOU GOING TO HELL"NAAR". I AM SURE THE ANSWER IS NO. WHEN IT COMES TO MARRIAGE, IS THE GIRLS CALL TO MARY WHO EVER SHE WANTS AS LONG AS HE IS MUSLIM,"Remember Islam is your behaviors not your words, means u can't say I am Muslim and not practice it" AND WILLING TO TAKE HER RESPONSIBILITIES, "losers & non-Muslims are out of the picture". AND THAT IS ALL WHAT THE PARENTS SHOULD ASK HER, BUT THEY CAN ALWAYS ADVICE HER NOT TO MARY THIS GUY EVENTHOUGH HE FULFILLED THE REQUIREMENTS, AND IF SHE SAYS NO IT IS HER CALL. NEED DALIILIS OR PROVE? PLS LET ME KNOW. I WOULD BE HONNERED TO GIVE YOU.
Nadira!
Walaal I am not suggesting that you do or don't marry with this Black Muslim bro. But I want to you to think about it b4 you make this type of decisions. This type of relationships have it's own drama like my sister HEAR ME.. said "There are going to be culture clashes, however as time goes by you will both adapt some how. There are things that you will never understand about his culture, and sometimes you will feel frustrated, and there will be things that he won't understand as well, but the main point is that you try to learn from one another, and make a strong fondation for your children!!" SO ASK YOUR SELF ARE YOU WILLING TO SACRIFICE AND GO THROUGH ALL OF THAT? IS HE WORTHY? DO YOU THINK HE WILL DO THE SAME FOR YOU?
So sis. before you make any decision ask your self those questions. And about your parents, I am sure they will accept him, if he fits the qualification, and see how serious you are about him, coz they know you can get married with or with out them. It is always the best thing to do to consult with your mom and dad. What would be better than seeing your family HAPPY at your wedding.
SOMEONE MENTIONED ABOVE, WOULD GIVE MY SISTER TO A BLACK MAN! HELL YEAH AS LONG AS HE IS MUSLIM AND MEET THE REQUIREMENTS OF OUR DIIN, I COULD CARELESS WHAT COLOR OR WHAT NATIONALITY HE IS FROM. BUT AS FAR AS ME, I WOULD NEVER MARRIED A WOMEN FROM ANY OTHER RACE, NOT THAT I AM RACIST OR ANYTHING, BUT I JUST LOVE MY SOMALI SISTERS, AND I KNOW WHAT I WANT AND WHAT THEY CAN PROVIDE TO ME.
UNTILL NEXT MY ALLAH BLESS ALL OF US. PEACE
WAA WALAALKIIN OO IDIN LEH S.C.W.W. |
| True Somali | Sunday, February 25, 2001 - 07:54 am
Nadira
My advise to you is go with the family. Simply because there is a cultual difference between the two of you and will always be there, unless you are a westernized somali lady who don't believe in what the somali culture stands for. Sure, you thought yourself to fall in love with him, and I believe if you find a nice somali man, you could do the same all over again. Trust me on this, a somali man can also fullfil your deepest darkest sexual fantasies and or desires. Don't bring a nigger to the family as an in-low and don't disgrace your family. |
| Shellman | Sunday, February 25, 2001 - 10:32 am
Nadira
I feel your pain and I understand you have to make a tuagh decisions. But haw long have ya'll been dating? did you guys spent enaugh time together if so and u still love the man and he feels the same way and " he is Muslim" too hell go for it. we can't judge the man his skin clour but his action and this raise the question have U had him yet? is he doign right
did u say Yes girl friend more power to U |
| HODA | Sunday, February 25, 2001 - 11:14 pm
DEAR NADIRA
SWEATY MY ADVICE TO YOU IS LISEN TO PARENT,TRY TO UNDERSTAND THEIR POINT, TALK TO THEM TELL THEM WHAT IS IN YOUR HEARD DON'T HOLD BACK MAKE THEM UNDERSTAND,I KNOW IT IS HARD FOR SOMALI PERSON TO EXPRESS THEIR FEELING BUT BELIAVE IT WORKS,IT IS ONE THING THAT I LEARN FROM OUR DIIN, AND STUDING PSYCHOLOGY.MAKE DU'A , FEAR ALLAAH INSHA ALLAAH ALAAH WILL HELP YOU.
JISKA ALAAHU QAYR
TAKE CARE
YOUR SIS IN ISLAM |
| Just hear me out aight | Monday, February 26, 2001 - 11:43 am
To whom it may concern !
wow I am really shocked at this comment? How dare could a sensable human being call another a "nigger"?? espcially when you are black as well?? "Don't bring a nigger to the family as an in-low and don't disgrace your family." what? what?)!!!!
(" |
| muna | Monday, February 26, 2001 - 06:46 pm
2 nadira
question: was he muslim when u met or is he one of those guys who convert for the sake of a female???
if he didnt convert 4 the sake of Allah and Allah alone...then i dont think the marriage would be blessed, however if he was already a muslim and practicing then by all means marry him... i agree entirely with jaw beelas, there is no garuntee what so ever that a somali guy would make u ne happier!
and about mohamedweli comment/statement...well obviously he has the wrong facts bcoz its a well known that ur parents have no right 2 tell u who u can and can not mary when they r muslim, just as they shouldnt force marriage on u...however it would be helpful 2 have their blessing so why dont u try talkin 2 them...they'll freak but they're bound to get over it and if they dont...well its their loss honestly |
| somali-jecel | Monday, February 26, 2001 - 08:24 pm
hi ppl!
i just wana say to all of you,did't we see this
shid b4.why ya dowing again i think this woman r
lier,and i think it's a time to stop this shid sis
thas all i can advise.
thanx to my ppl
by somali |
| mammacita | Monday, February 26, 2001 - 08:31 pm
Do u know what happens to ediots like who runs away from their own kind.....WELL ITS FOR YOU TO FIND OUTT.......
no one should stop you niether support you,,use your brains u werent put on this world for no reason .......now i'm not puttinf u down all i'm saying is that ..look around you...how many dumb gurlz said oh we gonna get a better life by marrying an outsider and do u know what happens to them .......they end with "hell on earth" i'm not saying all but majority...trust me i seen alot..
Plus for the sake of ur entire family...
i mean i know his muslim but look at it in other ways everything clashes.....he wont be even able to communicate with your elder family let alone urr parents.....
Its probably hard for you to decide and look at thingz b4 u jump into comclusion...
comapre the wieght of the "advantages" and the disadvantages" see which comes more....
And one last very important opinion......
If u get married without your parents permision and bleassings i can swear it ur life will turn out a living hell....
and i've seen it happen...
cioaaaaaaaaaaaa
dots of loveeeeeeeeee............mammacita |
| jabril | Thursday, March 01, 2001 - 01:56 am
to nadira,
hi sis i am here to say what i think u should do in this satition, okey first of all thanks alah that u fall in love with muslim guy, it doesn't matter if he is black or brown or white or yellow what really matter is that he is muslim. i know our parent are very important to us they are every thing that we have and i know some parents can be demandable like do this do that then u have to fellow what ever they told you to it is like you have no freedom at all, we all young somali ppl have the right to fight for what we really went in our life, like you nadira. okey lets talk how ur family we react when u tell them that u in love with black man, well there are two types of parent one they care about traditional tribes, families and the other parent they care about what their children wants, nadira if the guy u are in love with is sweet, loving, when i say loving i mean cares about your family and the last thing that he is good muslim then i don't see why u can't marry that kind person but i am not sure how ur parent we react when they hear you in love with black man, maybe they'll say hey look she brought jareer in our house lol i hope they won't say that, what u need to do now, go to your lovely family alone, tell them daddy muumy i love you more than any thing in this world and i don't want to loss you, then you tell them that you are in love with black man and that he is mulsim, that u love him, that he is the right man for you, that he is kind person, that he is muslim agian and again he is muslim mulsim muslim muslim, if your parent say no then you know what to do, like you leave the man u love and stay with ur family, if my parent is no to this satition like this i would probably say i well leave with this man and u well never see me again in your life or you accept me to marry this man
i hope my advice was usefull to you if you got any q then i hear to answer it good by sis and may alah be with you |
