     Deeqa (Public user) | Unrecorded Date
{#1 and #2 are two people speaking over a two-way radio}.
Radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations,
10-10-95. Transcript declassified 21-05-96. Frequency classified.
*****************************************************************
#1: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision.
#2: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.
#1: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.
#2: No. I say again, suggest you divert YOUR course.
#1: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS MISSOURI, WE ARE A LARGE WARSHIP OF THE US NAVY. DIVERT YOUR COURSE NOW!
#2: This is a Canadian lighthouse. Your call. |
| Madar (Public user) | Unrecorded Date
What's your point here sis., Trying to be funny, Idon't think so. Try again, goodluck. |
| Anon (Public user) | Unrecorded Date
coooool enjoyed it, keep it coming |
| Deeqa (Public user) | Unrecorded Date
Salaam,
Madar: I don't know why you didn't get that. My twelve-year-old brother did. Oh well. |
| Deeqa | Unrecorded Date
Hey more about Americans:
A little boy wanted $100 very badly; his mother told him to pray to God for it. He prayed for two weeks but nothing turned up. Then he decided perhaps he should write God a letter requesting the $100.
When the post office received the letter addressed to God, they opened it and decided to send it to the President. The President was so impressed, touched and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy $5. He thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.
The little boy was delighted with the $5 and sat down to write a thank-you letter, which read as follows:
"Dear God,
Thank you very much for sending me the money. I noticed that you had to send it through Washington. As usual, those thieving bastards deducted $95." |
| Fai'sa | Unrecorded Date
HAHAHAHHAHAHA
Deeqa sista ya bad
am in stitches
Plz keep 'em coming
lov ya'l |
| Deeqa | Unrecorded Date
Thanks Fa'isa: enjoy!
Can't remember where I read this one but here goes:
An American went to England for a vacation. At the hotel, he was instructed to go to his room by the butler (? at a hotel?).
{now, you MUST imagine a British accent for the butler, and a Texan drawl for the tourist}
"Please use the lifts on your left," murmurs the butler.
"Lifts? Oh, you mean the ELEVATORS," laughs the American.
"No, I mean the LIFTS." sniffs the butler, offended.
"Partner, Americans invented ELEVATORS" retorts the American, "so we should know what they are called!"
"Yes, but we invented the LANGUAGE." replies the English butler. |
| bash bash & lu'lu | Unrecorded Date
Deeqa..go find something better to do than stealin' all those "so-called-jokes" of the net.
Aight? And let's remember sis, come up next time with a somali jokes since "this is a somali website".
Peace.. |
| Shamsa | Unrecorded Date
Deeqa, grl that was funny.
Bash bash & lulu: listen, WE ARE LIVING IN THE WEST, it doesn't hurt to know once in a while the "american mentality" aight. I actually enjoyed it, and it's nice to read something that aint a somali joke sometime. This is one of the few english joke in this forums that isn't offensive in anyway. Deeqa do yo own thang, and don't listen to 'em........... Peace Out |
| Aboto Xawo | Unrecorded Date
ok here is one.......
FYI.....I AM NOT THE AUTHOR- just the one that plagiarized!
A Texan buys a round of drinks for all in the bar because, he announces his wife has just produced "a typical Texas baby boy weighing 20 pounds."
Congratulations shower him from all around, and many exclamations of "Wow!" are heard. A woman faints due to sympathy pains.
Two weeks later, he returns to the bar. The bartender says, "Say, you're the father of the typical Texas baby that weighed 20 pounds at birth. How much does he weigh now?"
The proud father answers, "Fifteen pounds." The bartender is puzzled, concerned.
"Why? What happened? He already weighed 20 pounds at birth. The Texas father takes a slow swig from his long-neck Lone Star, wipes his lips on
his shirtsleeve, leans into the bartender and proudly says, "Had him circumcised." |
| Anonymous | Unrecorded Date
war waxa yeey ugudaran tii@@@@@@@@~###~~~###.....
HOW COME EVERY THING IN THIS WORLD IS, ABOUT, WANT TO BE, FROM,.....AMERICA |
| Hana | Unrecorded Date
ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm WHAT fool |
| Anonymous | Unrecorded Date
HELLO; ABDUKAIF ER EN ..... |
| Anonymous | Unrecorded Date
I Loooooooooooooooooove your jokes. Keep them coming. We're trying to have fun aren't we!!!!!!! |
| Hitman | Unrecorded Date
Americans are smarter than that, y'all need to stop hating , it's obvious you wasn't hugged a lot when you were little, maybe a hug a day would it for you, Deeqa. |
| Rough Ridder | Unrecorded Date
What is the difference between George Washington,
Richard Nixon, and Bill Clinton?
Washington couldn't tell a lie, Nixon couldn't
tell the truth, and Clinton doesn't know the
difference. |
| Rough Ridder | Unrecorded Date
Hitman American puppet check dis out.
You're a person of rare intelligence. It's rare when you show any.
You'll never use your mind. You can't lose what you never had.
They can't measure your intelligence. The scale won't go that low. |
| Muriidi | Unrecorded Date
Check this one
An American was touring in Italy with friends, they came to a pub to have a drink, after few shots, he saw an Italian sitting across from their table, his friends saw the puzzled look on his face, so they followed his eyes and saw his spitting image across the bar. The American came over to the Italian and asked him if his mother ever visited the U.S. the Italian, understanding what he means said "No, but my father did" |
| Rough Ridder | Unrecorded Date
ARKANSAS STATE RESIDENCY APPLICATION
Name: ________________ (_) Billy-Bob
(last) (_) Billy-Joe
(_) Billy-Ray
(_) Billy-Sue
(_) Billy-Mae
(_) Billy-Jack
(_) Billy-Jefferson
(Check appropriate box)
Age: ____
Sex: ____ M _____ F _____ N/A
Shoe Size: ____ Left ____ Right
Occupation:
(_)Farmer
(_)Mechanic
(_)Hair Dresser
(_)Un-employed
Spouse's Name: __________________________
Relationship with spouse:
(_) Sister
(_) Brother
(_) Aunt
(_) Uncle
(_) Cousin
(_) Mother
(_) Father
(_) Son
(_) Daughter
(_) Pet
Number of children living in household: ___
Number that are yours: ___
Mother's Name: _______________________
Father's Name: _______________________ (If not
sure, leave blank)
Education: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest grade
completed)
Do you (_)own or (_)rent your mobile home?
(Check appropriate box)
___ Total number of vehicles you own
___ Number of vehicles that still crank
___ Number of vehicles in front yard
___ Number of vehicles in back yard
___ Number of vehicles on cement blocks
Firearms you own and where you keep them:
____ truck
____ bedroom
____ bathroom
____ kitchen
____ shed
Model and year of your pickup: ___________194_
Newspapers/magazines you subscribe to:
(_)The National Enquirer
(_)The Globe
(_)TV Guide
(_)Soap Opera Digest
___ Number of times you've seen a UFO
___ Number of times you've seen Elvis
___ Number of times you've seen Elvis in a UFO
How often do you bathe:
(_)Weekly
(_)Monthly
(_)Not Applicable
Color of teeth:
(_)Yellow
(_)Brownish-Yellow
(_)Brown
(_)Black
(_)N/A
Brand of chewing tobacco you prefer:
(_)Red-Man
How far is your home from a paved road?
(_)1 mile
(_)2 miles
(_)don't know |
