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SEX THERAPHY (Clinic/CONSELLING)????????? ANY PROBLEMS knock HERE!!!!!!!!!!

SomaliNet Forum (Archive): Ila Qosol - Jokes: Archive (August 2000): SEX THERAPHY (Clinic/CONSELLING)????????? ANY PROBLEMS knock HERE!!!!!!!!!!
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DR DESIRE

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HOORAY.......People now you got the oppurtunity to solve your problems~~~~I know you probably saying SUBHANA ALLAH, but it is something we all need to consider. One way or other we all need to know and face it, eventually everybody is going to face that one day so let's not all jump the conclution and start insulting each other.Be wise and enjoy the ride>>>
Anybody who is scared or ashmed to ask something in their sexuallity this is the place to be!!!!!!

Tbone99 i know you going to give me a list here but it is a time we TALK ABOUT SEX, LIFE, OVERWEIGHT AND BODY IMAGEs.
Especially people who want to lose weight we finally descovered the simplest way to reduce fat and becoming fit. SO let's not all sit around and watch soap people MOVE!!!!!!!!!!111


CREDIT CARDS ARE EXCEPTED, NO CASH OR CHEQUE LOL

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HANGIN' LOOSE

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DEAR: Dr Desire

I got this problem which i never wear bras because they'r so uncomfortable. I hate them! My poops are only small and i run, walk and dance without pain. But will not wearing a bra affect my breasts in any way? Free spirit lol

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DR Desire

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dEAR hANGIN' LOOSE:

Whether you choose to wear is totally up to you, and if you feel more comfortable not wearing one, then why not? Women with larger breasts often feel more comfortable with extra support. Ifyou do decide at any stage i would advise you to have it go. make sure you get corrected fitted one that is if you want.

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Anonymous

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hangin loose

sis or bro as i see it ur fake...fake...fake...
what are u a transexual?

stop insluting us women. if by chance ur a female why don't u get one that fits, or try sport bras cuz there really comfortable.

p.s. no offence sis/bro but u could have asked that question to ur friends not in here.

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sexullay challenged

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Doc:
I do have a problem, but I'd like to tell it to you in private, in your office that is. So, how can I contact you??

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A shocked SmOoTh!!

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Everyday itz something new from U somalian people ....I swear U all Crazy.....Damn whateva did selfrespct?? GO....?....Do U all think just coz We live in da FUC*KED up west me have to act like them too? .....Somalian peeepz PlZ go back home b4 itz too LATE..!!!!


Peace SmOoTh!

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Tangy

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DEAR SMOOTH
DR DESIRE can say what very she want cuz it's none of your business bro and all of us are not crazy ok we normal people who are expressing our feeling it's that a problem i don't think so.
And anyway we use to about this back home the different was that we said in a different language.And topic is nothing to be shame about is everday life. Everytime WE EXPRESS our feeling i'm sick of hearing that we act too westizest and that we should go back home. so just shut up ok mr smooth.

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A shocked SmOoTh

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TangY: First and formost i would like to inform U that i'm a sista.

Seconedly....WE are not english nor should WE act like them....I'm not sayin' that one can not Exprezz.....he'z or her'z feelingz....on the forums but sista WE should only go so far.....WE are Ppl of god we know right from wrong....Yet still WE have some somalian PpLz talkin' totall rubbish on diz forums.....I'm all of FUN but i'm more for SELF-RESPCT...

Qustion, How far is too far ....???
(needin' to know diz)
SmOoTh

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Shanaaz

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To all:
Smooth you r right, we r ppl of god. I agree with the fact that some ppl have gone over board. Sex is a private act between a husband N' a wife. I suggest to refer to ISLAM...yes ISlam. Our deen has more info about this topic. Go to your local sheikh, don't be shy to ask coz they r qualified aight. Somali ppl desperately need some guidance, and if you think you can seek it from the west, then you definately have a problem. AS the sista said "Go back home B4 it's too late!"

To Dr.Desire: This is the jokes section, I think you're lost .

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maryan00

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i think we should talk about those things because it will help teenages and adults who dont' know those things. i dont think that is problem to our religous in anyway. so, be care what u saying and dont say nasty things on the line.

p.s

bilan

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Anonymous

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haboon..walaal i dont see how such a tobic will be helpful to our teenagers and adult as you said because this website is access by young children and i dont see how such things discussed here will be helpful to them.

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DR DESIRE

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WHATEVER PEEPS.
I knew you people will be offended but the whole idea was this topic to talk about each individuals ideas and the way they feel about sex, and other issues. sO IF YOU AIN'T LIKE IT DON'T COME....... and pls the whole point that this topic is under jokes because it sUppOse to be joke........ DUH

QUESTION for you shocked smooth,
baby, how on earth did you expect to have sex when you don't have any idea how to.;)according to (STD) smoothG you suppose to know all this in order to figure out, how you get effected an pla pla pla...............

to Maryan
Yo were right about teenagers how they getting effected by those disseses by not carefulling or using any protections, i know that somali people are so denial about their teenagers and how they say about they totally ANGELS, KIds do things behind their parents backs. PEEPS give this one more think and keep it in mind that we all not angels.

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Tangy

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hi Dr dersire
I'm support you 100% girl and it's time for people to know what the really meaning to sex that it
and not be shy and all.
And to smooth I don't give damn what the hell you are I'm sick hearing somethings and whether dr desire write in the joke section or any other section the point is that doctor is trying give advice to the young about everyday life and I guess some people can't handle that.
Well that all for today.
bye

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Abshiro

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okay iam confused is this topic about young people and their sex life or bra sizes, whatever it's about leave the girl who wrote this alone. if u can't come up with a better topic u don't have to get affended so cut the crab and find something else that make's sentence to complain about.

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Shanaaz

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Dr.Desire,

No, I think that you're confusing ppl. If this is under jokes, then all this bulls**** that is being posted here is infact bull. But then again, you want to have a dialog about sex. Let me say this to you, even though i'm a follower of my religion, don't ever assume that people like me or perhaps smooth "don't know anything about STD, etc". What makes you think that this is Sex Education Forum??? Hell, I suggest to ppl that there are better educational ways to learn about this topic then from a forums. That's all I have to say. In conclusion, if you just wanna have a plain dialog about sex for whatever reason (Which i think it's overrated in tv's ,etc.), but if you want to go beyond that, then I clearly object!!

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tom

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Dr Desire


are you qualified therapist.... or you just one of those wannabes............if you are can you tell me what causes premature ejeclation?

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Dr desire

Unrecorded Date
premature ejaculation is caused when men are highly tempted by the fruit of the opposite species. I'm sorry if you ever experienced such a public disaster. I suggest you eat lots of garlic and onion...for it will allow for this problem to take its toll at the regular time (You will actually ejaculate when having sexual intercourse)

Good luck buddy
(and yes I am the DOCTOR of DESIRE)....A specialist and qualified (PHd) in my field. So until than enjoy your sex life.

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Anonymous

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When me and my partner French kiss i don't like the taste of it and i don't want to disapoint, so what would you suggest my doctor. I don't enjoy it absolotly and i get disgusted. I wasn't like this before so I'm confused whether i have changed or the problem is by the other partner. Please

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FunkMasterFlexG

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I have 3 legs but i wish if i had only an extra finger. The third leg is cuasing me problems, such humuliating effects on me. Doctor can you arrange something out for me. I'm desbrate i can't even satisfy a woman its only there for an extra piece. I often play with myself but then i'm bored.

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Dr diehard

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This is dr Diehard sitting for dr desire who took off in the thanks giving holiday!dr diehard is qualified and certified doc like doc desire who is hear to answer your ?s.

To Anon
The reason might be bad breath and its because your partner ate something that smell bad , tell her to be vegetarian and chew gum ,brush teeth and use alot of mouthwash . also she can use pop and altoids
and have fun kissing is something special!
By diehard.com

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DR diehard

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2 funkMasterFlexG ( The third one)

i didn't understood your Qustion quite well, i will try to answer to the best of my Knowledge,
Try to relax the "thing" dont always funtion properly > by the way is the first problem being Gettin "hard" I need to Know your Age (if you dont mind ) before I recommend VIAGRA!

on Your other question. Masturbation , sexual tension , Fantasis are all part of our human makeup . Enjoy the pleasure of Your body man!!!
BE grateful to have this gift and dont feel bored
its surely a safer and more responsible outlet than other alternative

Dont quote me on this > but i have read somewhere its somehow recommended in islam
till later and have fun

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curious

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what is viagra and mesturbation doc?

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curious

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ooh i forgot to ask u one more thing.

what is the best way to make love to a woman?

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LOVELYLADY

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TO:curious

dump question u could ask that to u father since they say father to son and mother to doughter
(wiil waa aabihii gabadhina waa hooyadeed) u should always remember this

TO:DE desire
hey i got question let's see how far u can get me aight
see i fall in love with this guy who lives different state than i do i even met him on the phone and i am realy in love so how can i tell if he loves me as much as i do or not huh

i need your best answer to this question

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Anonymous

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To: DrDesire


HI DOCTOR..I EXTREMILY APPRECIATED YOUR BEING SOME KIND OF HELP TO YOUR SOCIETY...AND SOME OF SOMALIAN PPL MIGHT BE SURPRISED TO HEAR THIS BUT WE ALL HUMAN BEING HAVE PROBLEMS AND WE SEE NO REASON WHY WE DON'T DO THAT.

WELL, GOING THROUGH TO THE POINT.

MY BEST FRIEND IS A GAY AND HE DOESN'T WANT TO BE AGAY BUT THOUGH HE TRIED EVERYTHING HE COULD DO FOR HIMSELF BUT HE GOT NO HELP AND I CAN'T HELP HIM.

SO PLS IN WHICH WAY CAN HE STOP BEING GAY?

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DR diehard

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this is dr diehard still sitting for dr desire,
who took is in holiday , don worry he will be back!

TO lovelylady

Your question is one that is faced by alot of people especially the Young ones,

LDR, commonly known as long distance relationship,is one of the most common ways of knowing each other nowadays,especially online
.

There is some advantage and disadvantages with this kind of relationship.
The best advantage is the ability to know each other and be frank with other and its possible to be deeply in love with this person though you never met face to face.


the disadvantage,is that this fellow can LIE and not to be detected , this way, alot of damage is done before YOU realise,

MY advice> follow your heart but dont exclude your head,
nabadday, who is next ?

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Dr diehard

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to Anonymous,
I dont want to Answer Your question , the simple reason be , it out of context!

GET OUT OF MY CLINIC YOU FAGGOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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tangy

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To annoy
I'm not a doctor but i can understand where you are coming from you see my friend and i went to high school together and had just told found out reasonly that he was gay in the back of my mine I always knew it but I avoided facing it . We grow up together and he had like most of the stuff that i did which was worried but give me the idea that he was gay.
But the point is that you should support him no matter but, but encourage him to be hetersexual which means straight.
love and take care annoy

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Ubax

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Could you guyZ be more discusting?
can i ask you all something>?
Do you have a religoin?
Am sure it's not ISLAM
because if it was you wouldent be talking
About ZINA And worse "GAY"
"tushabahu bilkufaar" wount get you any
where but in hell fire.
So please think befor you post something
like this.

To my sistas "Smooth&shanaaz"
Please lets not assume simple because they
claim to be Somali's that they are "muslims"
Take care sistahZ.


And lastly
My ALAAH (SWT) show us the right path!

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Ubax

Unrecorded Date
Could you guyZ be more discusting?
can i ask you all something>?
Do you have a religoin?
Am sure it's not ISLAM
because if it was you wouldent be talking
About ZINA And worse "GAY"
"tushabahu bilkufaar" wount get you any
where but in hell fire.
So please think befor you post something
like this.

To my sistas "Smooth&shanaaz"
Please lets not assume simple because they
claim to be Somali's that they are "muslims"
Take care sistahZ.


And lastly
My ALAAH (SWT) show us the right path!

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SmOoTh

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Allah walaalo Ubax...I fear what is going to become of are "so called people"....Am worried Cuz I don't think its gonna get BETTER...somalian ppl have lost their selfrespcT ...and worse their diin....i understand this is in the "jokez" but who finds it at all funny...talking about a somali muslim brotha telling the world he's GAY?...I mean if we in somalia ...WOULD such thingz be okay "Oh mum dad world am gay"...yet still i call myself a muslim?...Ummm?.....

To Shanaaz & Obax what can WE us young somlian *MUSLIMS* do to save Ur men and woman form hell that they are gonna END up in ?

Much Luv.
SmOoTh.

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Shanaaz

Unrecorded Date
Salaams
sister ubax: Very good q, what r they? Muslims?

Sister SmOoTh: Walaalo, no one can help a person, unless one decides to help him/her self for the sake of Allah. However, somalis are an amazing bunch. Since we're not back home, this society encourages us to assimilate and deny any pride of our culture and worst of all, our deen. What our ppl are forgetting is that much of our culture's values comes from ISLAM's principles, b'coz we r muslims. But in this part of the world, since it's a secular system,they have separated culture and lifestyle from religion. So somalis, having immigrated to North America and Europe, have separated deen and culture, and basically think that to be religious you have to wear a kufi or wear a long jilbaab. NO, i think the problem is that of mentality, and if they adhere to these thoughts, then there's no room for change. Also, somali ppl tend emphasize alot on culture and forget the most important component of our lifes, islaam. Islaam teaches us morals, how to treat your brother, sister, family, and even how take care of the environment. To make a long story short, let's change our hearts and stop the hatred and the "acting up" ppl. Remember, Ramadan is only a week away, it's the perfect time to start.
W'salaam

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sina

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To ubax,shanaaz and smooth
We are not all bad ok, this is the jokes session where you can say anything and most of us here are all jokes and that ok, noone as lost their religon they just kiddind about things so stop saying that somalia's are lossing their religon cuz the true is we are trying to having little fun and that not sin at all.

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SmOoTh

Unrecorded Date
Salaamz and blessingz all:

My Sista Shanaaz i hope U are in the best of health....U rite gurl U can't help people that don't want to be helped...Allah *SwT*
is the only one that can show them the rite path....

And about ramadan i have to say my sista more muslimz are looking foward to the Yr 2K then they are ramadan..And i find this very sad seein' as this is a holy month...and young somali muslims rather be out ...SINNIG... then pray to their Allah...

Peace be in all Ur souls..
SmOoTh.

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Ubax

Unrecorded Date
Asalaamu Caleeykum,Smooth & Shanaaz thank you for you words of wisdom.Highly apreciated.And truely
"GOD helps those who help themselves".And to sina
this might be a "joke"sight but the things printed
are deeply distubing,,you say "fun" ok but there is time for fun and time for seriousness,especialy
when our "somali" people are evedently going astray.But all we can do is pray that our home country becames at peace(and if no when it does i wonder how many people are planning to go back to it?) since everyone is so westenized?,as my sista
(shanaaz) pointed outwe have forgoten our rutes
our culture and most importantly our religoin YES
ISLAM. So please remember the way you were brought up am sure most of you went to "dhugsi" if not finished the "QURAN" atleast read some of it.
But now we seem to have left it behind.Having the same mentality as the "kafiriin" that we are going to live for ever,and forgot about "Akhira" All and All.

Let's think about this "HOLLY MONTH OF RAMAHDAN"
And try our best to do good deeds with ALAAH *SWT*
help Amiin.(for the "SHEEHDAN" are no way to be blamed as they are kept away for the whole month).
Wacaleykuma salaam waraxmatulahi wabarakatuhu.

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Dr Desire

Unrecorded Date
Hi people your Dr is back from China, sorry about my absent but i had to take some chinese medicine (lol)

Excuse me here for objecting this whole thing that some of you misunderstood. Hello peeps the whole idea for this topic is to help one another, it's not some kind of tragic thing and we should all be carried out.. The whole point is to help people like Anonymous who is trying to help their friends and has no clue at all how to what so ever..
So let's all come down and relax and not insult each other, expressing your sexuality has nothing to do with religion. C'mon guys why is it so shame to talk about what you feeling?or what has happened to you?

To Anon

Your friends situation is hanging up side down and you've got to talk though with it. Being a gay is absulutly rediculous. I would advise you to have chat with your friend and see how it goes..

Luv n' Peace

To UBAX
DON'T PUSH IT SIS!!!!!!!!!!!

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Dr Desire

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dEAR uBAX
I APPRECIATED your concern about the holly month of ramadan but it's not ramadan yet. So make sure during ramadan you don't come here by hiding while others are fasting.I know pegeons like you what they do for living so let's not cross the line
PeACE

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MissX

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Dr Desire,

Astagfurullah bro, I can't believe u are dissin' Ubax like dat, let the sistah do her thang..as u are doin ya thing..I mean she was tellin pple to know their limits cuz its almost ramadan and u are callin her a pigeon...hello???? do u know what the word means brotha...I think not!! Ubax, Shanaaz & SmOoTh...U go Grlz!!!

I got a question for ya Dr Desire..what qualifications do you have to be a sex counsilor? and WHY IN THE WORLD IS THIS TOPIC POSTED ON THE JOKE SECTION if u are 4real? I am curiouz to know the answer b4 i start postin up my so-called sex problems on this page...as im sure everyone is ....

~~Be Peace My pple~~

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SmOoTh

Unrecorded Date
Blezzingz all:

To DrDesire...Firstly ma brotha U have no respct...the sista did not dizrspct U ...but still U wanna call her a pigeon...PLZ go and look UP the meaing of the word in a english dictionary U hear....

And secondly....who r U for men and woman to came to U with their adversity?...ppl like Anon and he's confused friend....need to seek help form

Allah *SwT*....And ask for fo'givenezz....

And like my sista Shanaanz said ....allah help ppl that help them-selfz....

Mizz X lol...."b4 i come with my Problems"

Peace and Luv ma people
SmOoTh

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MissX

Unrecorded Date
SmOoTh....

Sistah..i was just tryna make a point..lol..i really dont go no Problems **Winkz**

~be peace~

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Shanaaz

Unrecorded Date
Salaamz my sisters Smooth, Ubax, & MissX:

I wanna say to you all Ramadan Kareem, it's only a few dayz away. I wish you all the best of luck and may allah *swt* increase our Iman(faith), amin. Dr.Desire, May allah help you, and all the confused ppl that I have came across. Make dua's 4 me, I got exams this week n' next. Hope to see ya all soon. W'salaams

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Ubax

Unrecorded Date
Asalaamu Caleeykum.Ramdhan Kariim.
Hello my sisters,Shanaaz,smooth & MissX
am thankfull for ur words of defence on my behalf,(MissX & smooth).
To Dr i dont wish to answer to ur insults,simple because It's Ramadhan (masha"ALAAH).So i just hope where ever you are,you haveing a good one.


Wacaleeykuma salaam all.

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SmOoTh

Unrecorded Date
Aslaamz....my sisterz...Shanaaz Ubax and MissX.....My U all have a happy and blezzed Ramdhan.....may Allah....*SwT*...keep U all safe ......Keep the faith grlz.......

Luv ya all to da MAX
SmOoTh

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Sista in Love

Unrecorded Date
dear desire...

grl i need your help i'm desperatly in love with this fiiine brotha..i liked for 2yrs now and never said a word to him..when he walks by me i feel like fainting how will i ever be able to talk to him...this is the guy i wnt to marry...i need your help.....

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dr. desire

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GRL SISTA IN LOVE U NEED TO GET A FREAKIN LIFE HOE WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE TO U HUH...I AINT YO DAMN CONCELLOR AIIGHT SO BITCH PLS DON'T COME TO ME WITH YOUR LITTLE CADAAN PROBLEMS AIIGHT GRL PLS!!!!

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LOL

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LOL DR WHAT THE •••• HAPPEND THOUGHT YOU A DR LOOL

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MA KACSATO

Unrecorded Date
TO: DR.DESIRE

DR. MY PROBLEM IS... MA KACSADO

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Desperate Nigga

Unrecorded Date
TO DR Desire

Yo Doc.....I need yo help badly!!!!!!! U see i got dis problem when I am gettin' jiggy with it and ma thingy doesn't perform! I can never satisfy a women so what should I do........Cause am a NIGGA
tryin' to get SOME.
p.s...reply as sson as possible!!
HELP

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Hodan

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DAYUM fool, you must be really desperate trying to seek advise from this so-called-docter. I suggest you try elsewhere (Desperate Nigga) instead of wasting yo time on this dude...who claims to have some sorta PHd, but can't give advise for sh*T. By the way Mr./Ms. Desire....what is your PHd for...Playa Hating? Cuz you seem to be criticizing, insulting and what not others..and let me tell you, that's not how a REAL Doctor would work....maybe U should take some advise from me, and cut the BS.

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Miss Dhibleeeeyyy

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TO DR DESIRE

Why don't ya just admit that this is your sick way of learning about sex.Sounds like you along with sex education U need some manners & some common DECENCY.

SOMALIANS
I know we don't get sex education at home but if you go to school and attend all your Science lessons I am sure all your questions will be answered.Alternatively ask your friends......If you have any that is (LOL).
THINK ABOUT IT

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Hodan

Unrecorded Date
It's a Tragedy How all you people talk about sex that word makes me sick to my stomach so Whyare we forgetting the fact that we're Musilim and Using such Words don't you know that People that are not somalies come to this site you should all be ashamed of yourselves.And as For the girl who doesn't wear a bra Sister do what you want,and We somalies don't have sex We get married first and then we make love so stop this nonsence you guys are all talking like you sex fear god read quran and stop the sex stupidty and get a life .

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Dr Desire

Unrecorded Date
I apologise by not attending my clinic regularly cuz i had patients complaining and i've been arrested 7 months.
TO: DR DIEHARD, I APPRECIATED THE HARD WORK AND THE SENSE OF HUMOUR AS WELL.. BUT MAKE SURE YOU DON'T KILL ANYBODY HERE...LOL
LET THE OTHER QULIFIED DR'S TO JOIN IN THAT'S IF THEY'R QUALIFIED, LAST THING WE NEED IS A DR WE HAVE NO CLUE WHAT PANADOLE IS...
To: anonymous
well,I hate to tell you this but your problem is you don't like your partner that much cuz you woun't be feeling disgused if you did..

And tell her to use anti smell detergent in the fUture.
Q 4 YOU . french kiss my ass, make sure you don't bite her lips. (lol)

TO: UBAX
excuse me here Girl as you know i'm a female doctor and i know your sexualy frustrated, honey it's not shame to discuse things like this. We all living things and some points we need to be open up a bit. I'm not here to critizise anybody nor telling people to have sex. We here for people like you who need big time help.

*^%$$#WARNING$#%***

If you don't enjoy this topic don't bother visiting simple is that.,.

To hodan:mrs(blind date)
Q 4 you honey,
let me guess how yo gonna have sex when you get married think about it..unless you wanna be WITH an old fart with no hope.
Besides nobody is saying have sex b4 marrage, all i said was PREPARE for it.You must be crious about it.
Is that where you go hodan real doctors wow spooky isn't it, under confidential stuff. Maybe you got the two thing huh, that's why you getting so aggressive.


Ps WHO EVER ANSWERED TO THAT POOR SISTA IN LOVE WASN'T ME. I APOLOGIZED SISA

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hebel

Unrecorded Date
Dr desire, how are you sire?
Can you wash condoms each use and are they dishwasher safe or machine wash with temple dry?
Please help me it started to come off right in the middle of my test drive, and I have to look for it each time. Its getting hectic Dr.

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INFORMER

Unrecorded Date
ppl u r so damn IF U WANT TO BE COUNELLED ABOUT SEX GO TO A REAL COUNCELLER/THERAPY.....THIS DR(FAKE)DESIRE WANTS TO MAKE PPL LUAGH....I GUESS THATS WAY THIS IS POSTED IN THIS SECTION
YET some of u idiots r taking it seriously...
i think someppl here r getting horney.....
now in this case how is this fake desire to help u
loooooooool THROUGH THE COMP screen???awaited answer??

PEACE Y'LL

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SIMPLICTY

Unrecorded Date
"I AINT A DAMN COUNCELLOR" LOL
U AINT A DAMN DR EITHER FAKE DESIRE

I LIKE THIS PAGE.....IT CRACKS ME UP
PPL R ACTUAALY FIGHTING/DISSING EACH OTHER
KEEP THE GOOD WORK...GUYZ
THIS MORE ENTERTAINING......THEN HAVING SEX LOL

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SIMPLICTY

Unrecorded Date
"I AINT A DAMN COUNCELLOR" LOL thats why u wrote councellor in your "heading"
U AINT A DAMN DR EITHER FAKE DESIRE

I LIKE THIS PAGE.....IT CRACKS ME UP
PPL R ACTUAALY FIGHTING/DISSING EACH OTHER
KEEP THE GOOD WORK...GUYZ
THIS MORE ENTERTAINING......THEN HAVING SEX LOL

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adviser

Unrecorded Date
hi bro & sis when ever you feel sexy you better go to a lover not to search this page ok
and i am talking from the dr. desire to simplicty



so peace out

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