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     | Unrecorded Date YOu know you're somali when.... you know you’re somali when you have relatives in Dixon you know you’re somali when your daily meal consists of canjaeero, baasto/bariis, and cambuulo (so I can’t spell in somali, shoot me!) you know you’re somali when your mother’s bestfriends come over and the neighbours end up calling the police because of the noise. you know you’re somali when your guest consider buzzing you downstairs to open the door, their way of calling ahead to let you know they’re coming [for females] you know you’re somali when you can’t use the words “boy” and “friend” in the same sentence without having you’re parents arrange for you to live with you abti (uncle) and his 4 wives somewhere in baadiiyo (rural part of somalia) [for females] you know you’re somali when can’t wear a thin see through blouse but it’s perfectly ok -no it’s wonderful for you to wear a diirac. you know you’re somali when you’re affraid to be in public places with the opposite sex, esepcially if there is another somali person within a 500 mile radius. you know you’re somali when the guest at a wedding start showing up at 1:00 am and the bride and groom arrive at 3:00 am. you know you’re somali when you use oil for grooming. you know you’re somali when you call other somali elders you’ve never met before abti(uncle) or aeedo(aunt) [for females] you know you’re being picked up by a somali man when he says “I know your father” you know you’re somali when you pronounce “p” and “b” the same way. you know you’re somali when you can out run your duugsii teacher (Quran teacher) you know you’re somali when doing drugs and drinking is absolutely, positively wrong but it’s common for somali men to chew qaad. you know you’re somali when your grandmother thinks every skinny white person has AIDS. you know you’re somali when your parents think a condom is a nice apartment. you know you’re somali when your parents say AstaqfurAllah when ever they hear the word sex you know you’re somali when your parents think the Gspot is an underground parking spot.
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| | Unrecorded Date YOu know you're somali when.... -you know you’re somali when you have relatives in Dixon -you know you’re somali when your daily meal consists of canjaeero, baasto/bariis, and cambuulo (so I can’t spell in somali, shoot me!) -you know you’re somali when your mother’s bestfriends come over and the neighbours end up calling the police because of the noise. -you know you’re somali when your guest consider buzzing you downstairs to open the door, their way of calling ahead to let you know they’re coming -[for females] you know you’re somali when you can’t use the words “boy” and “friend” in the same sentence without having you’re parents arrange for you to live with you abti (uncle) and his 4 wives somewhere in baadiiyo (rural part of somalia) -[for females] you know you’re somali when can’t wear a thin see through blouse but it’s perfectly ok -no it’s wonderful for you to wear a diirac. -you know you’re somali when you’re affraid to be in public places with the opposite sex, esepcially if there is another somali person within a 500 mile radius. -you know you’re somali when the guest at a wedding start showing up at 1:00 am and the bride and groom arrive at 3:00 am. -you know you’re somali when you use oil for grooming. -you know you’re somali when you call other somali elders you’ve never met before abti(uncle) or aeedo(aunt) -[for females] you know you’re being picked up by a somali man when he says “I know your father” -you know you’re somali when you pronounce “p” and “b” the same way. -you know you’re somali when you can out run your duugsii teacher (Quran teacher) -you know you’re somali when doing drugs and drinking is absolutely, positively wrong but it’s common for somali men to chew qaad. -you know you’re somali when your grandmother thinks every skinny white person has AIDS. -you know you’re somali when your parents think a condom is a nice apartment. -you know you’re somali when your parents say IstaqfurAllah when ever they hear the word sex -you know you’re somali when your parents think the Gspot is an underground parking spot.
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| | Unrecorded Date Hi layla it's me Fay. I had to say hi and that i absolutely loved it. Most of the things do describe my parents LOL. JUST WANNA SAY LOVIN YA LOADS AND YOUR SIS CAME ROUND TODAY (WHOOPS I'M SHOUTING AGAIN). Yours' Faiza
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| | Unrecorded Date Hey LaYlA; That was funny and yet so true...let me add few more alright...? You know you're somali woman when....You proudly dial 911 for your husband after an argument. You know you`re somali woman when....The word "i love you" is so hard for you to say it first! You know you`re somali woman when....The house gets cloudy with excessive amount of "Uunsi". You know you`re somali woman when....You`re too shy to tell a guy that you have feelings for him. You know you're somali woman when....You wear dirac during winter........Ouch! i`m talking about frigid weathers. Ladies; I hope i did`nt touch a nerve! if i did please forgive me..... Well, that`s it for today..... Quite Peace!
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| | Unrecorded Date Heya nasir bro that was a bit touchy, especially what you said about it being hard for somalian women to say the word "i love you", that's not true brother your obviously generalising all somalian women but that's cool (you can have your own opinion). But i'm sure i can come up with some more stuff that Somalian men do a lot so stay tuned.... as for them not showing their feelings, well i don't know what you mean. If the guy is your husband/boyfriend then you should but as for other guyz we have no reason to show our feelings. What do you mean by "show their feelings"? Speak to you all v. soon ppl. Keep it reall.
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| | Unrecorded Date Hey LaYLla this is one of the funniest jokes i've read so far. Nasir even though what u said is only about somalian women, I have to admit that it made me smile. ANYWAYZ Keep up the great work. bub bye
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| | Unrecorded Date Faiza/Faze; Well,first of all I apologize if i offended anyone in my previous posting about...<You know you`re Somali woman when>.....sorry i did`nt intend to engage or create a bad picture about Somali women in general or as an individual,my choices and intensions to do so(negetive stuff)are nil=zero.. Faiza i think you missed my point about..<too shy to show their feelings>...what i was talking about was...lets say you have a huge crush on me and I don't have a clue you feel that way about me would you break the ice and let me know about it face to face....? I think not! U.Sgirl; Thanx for the smile...loved it!..LOL! Quite Peace!.....So long every body.
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| | Unrecorded Date Nasir: Alright, alright i rest my case. You win, so i guess i wouldn't confront you face to face and tell you that i liked you (hypothetically i mean). That's just not my style bro, but that's not to say that all other Somalian girlz are like me is it? And besides there are other methods and ways that i can tell a guy i like him. Other very, very important ways like eye contact, the way you speak to him, the tone of your voice, the way you act around him, the way you speak about him to others eg. his friends. And beleive you me, if he hasn't realised i like him by the time i've done all these things then he's not the guy for me. And i've never met a guy who didn't get the obviouse (that i liked him)by the end of our conversation. Cos my man needs to be with all these things, especially eye contact, it's very important to me. I hope i have simplified things for you, and don't worry about offending me, i didn't take it to heart too much. LOL Speak to you all soon ppl. Keep smiling. :) Faiza
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| | Unrecorded Date Hello Layla!! Hey sis. What can i say? That was Incredible,and so funny, and so accurate at the sometime. Maybe, you should invite everyone to add one more line to it, just like Nasir. To Faze and Everyone else this is just a joke, we can need to make a controversial out of everything.pple don't take it personal, its Okay to stereotype sometimes. PS.Layla, Why do I think you're in Canada? Hanad
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| | Unrecorded Date Hanad: Ever heard of "freedom of speach"? I can make a controversy out of whatever i want and you betta believe it. Faiza
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| | Unrecorded Date ..you know you are somali when you can't stay in one state more than two years. ..you know you are somali when you have a British citizenship,a Canadian landing, and still apply for asylum in America. ..you know you are somali when you call marijuana the fool(nacasta). ..you know you are somali when you use the phrase "where are you chating from" as a pick up line in a chatroom. ..you know you are somali when you take a student- loan to get married. ..you know you are somali when you stop saying "I love you" after the first child. ..you know you are somali when you get mad if anyone says something about your clan's worlord. ..you know you are somali when you show up with a rental car infront of weddings and parties. ..you know you are somali when you avoid somalis because you think they are sick people and that you are different than them. ..you know you are somali when you fight and curse in a soccer game more than you play. ..you know you are somali when you don't know the difference between FGM and virginty. ..you know you are somali when 69 means to you 1969. ..you know you are somali when 10% to 30% of your income does not go to your banck account but to Dahabshiil,Al-barakaat, or Amal .....you know you are somali if you get calls after midnight from Somalia,Kenya, or Ethiopia ..and finally you know you are somali if what i wrote made sense to you. samka is out
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| | Unrecorded Date Hi Sammy You sound very expert specially in the number games----what was the 69 bussiness all about!!!!!! educate me sis. Funny enough I was born that year.
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| | Unrecorded Date bro sammy is a bro. take care
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| | Unrecorded Date HEY NICE FORUM GUYS......... LOVED IT. I GOT ONE TOO....... ....U KNOW U IS A SOMALI......... ...if u have a fake name and your birthdate starts with 01/01/... .
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| | Unrecorded Date Ha Layla i was dyin!!!!!!!!!!! Bro Nasir those were funny too keep it up, but how come you know so much about your sistaz? Naa i'm kidding.and sammy my bro those were true FACTS.It's all good. And last but not least Dean Philosophy,that was a good one sis/bro o1/01.. I know this somalian family who bloody all got the same birthday.A lot of somaliezzz also give 01/07.. as their day of birth which was the day and the month somalia put their flag in the sky (it was when Somalia got indepentent) Our culture is soo funny all the time. Your sista gives much love always!
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| | Unrecorded Date Hi Everyone.... I am glad u all enjoyed the joke. And I love what u added to it. They were all hilarious!!! Fay???!!!....WHO???!!! "PS.Layla, Why do I think you're in Canada? Hanad" Ur right Hanad...What gave it away...The part about having relatives in DIXON??...lol To Everyone else, Ur all Welcome to add a few lines. Gotta go... LaterZ LaYlA
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| | Unrecorded Date Ok maybe you are funny, but damn yo should be proude of who yo are ian't nothin wronge for been real though, by the way your story made cry uuhum whyyyy layle whyyy
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| | Unrecorded Date hi layla iam going to visit dixion will you help me having cajeera and shown me that woman wearing dirac ??????????????????
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| | Unrecorded Date lol@abdiyare I would like to show u how to make canjeero...but one problem... I don't live in Dixon. I visit there often too, cuz i have relatives there...lol Later LaYlA
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| | Unrecorded Date Wow this is great i lived it guys keep up the good work
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| | Unrecorded Date HERES MINE CHECH IT YOU KNOW YOUR SOMALIAN WHEN YOUR FIRST NAME IS FARAX OR MOHAMMED: YOU KNOW YOUR SOMALIAN WHEN YOU HAVE CANJEERO ON SATURDAY MORNINGS, YOU KNOW YOUR SOMALIAN WHEN YOU GET ASKED WHAT QABIIL ARE YOU, YOU KNOW YOUR SOMALIAN WHEN YOU GOT TWO NAMES: YOU KNOW YOUR SOMALIAN WHEN YOU GO TO WEDINGS, YOU KNOW YOUR SOMALIAN WHEN YOUR DAD AND HIS FRIENDS EAT JAAT IN THE HOUSE, YOU KNOW YOUR SOMALIAN WEN YOUR RELATIVES PHONE YOU FROM ITHIOPIA AND ASKS YOU TO SEND MONEY,
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| | Unrecorded Date HHHHIii guyz that was a chilly filled jokeS...:) YET THEY SEEM TO BE SO TRUE Here's more!!!!!!!:) -you know youra somali when ENGLISH music is HARAM to your parents but somali music is ok -your know youra somali when u eat banana with all your food..i.e rice , spaghetti -you know youra somali when u can't have a meal without "HILIB" -you know youra somali when u lie about your age -you know youra somali girl when u r 18 for eva -you know youra somaliguy when your 21 for eva -you know youra somali when your born {1st of january} -you know youra somali when "bariis" is da only food at weddingz -you know youra somaligirl when your behind (arss) falls two metres behind you! -you know youra somali guy when 4 wives is still not enough -you know youra somali guy when the only time u use the religion as evidence is when proving 4 wives is allowed. -you know youra somaliwoman when you say to the emigration your husband died or got killed and comes back from the dead 1 and half years later -you know youra somali women when your favorite saying to centre link "Single mother" -you know youra somali woman when your documents say you have no husbund and your still having babies i'm out
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| | Unrecorded Date that was funny. keep up the good work
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| | Tuesday, June 20, 2000 - 08:36 am Jamiila Do you know your somali when Jamiil was the fella Your parents had arrenged you to marry??? Little som'n I did 4 Jamila LOL ***** Hope YOU got my point!!!! pzcc out Ading som'n to this un stopable Joke!!!
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| | Unrecorded Date U know ur somali when U can't live with out ceeyr even if U got relyable job. you know ur somali when hid ur workers desk if she didn't send you ur pay check ceeyr screaming at her like U worked hard 4 that money. iam out.
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| | Saturday, September 23, 2000 - 10:51 pm HA HA HA
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| | Sunday, September 24, 2000 - 10:31 am u know your somali when you on welfare but still working you know your somaligirl when you say your going to c ur girlfriend/library when you go and see your man instead you know your a somaligirl when you constantly on the look out for somalis when your not wearing your hijab you know your a somali when say choventus instaed of juventus or cherry instaed of jerry you know your somaliman when its ceeb for you to work in the house when there are females around
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| | Monday, September 25, 2000 - 10:35 am WARYAAAADA SHEEKO YAABLEH AYAAD MEESHAN KA CAMIRATEEN, WAX WALBA OO SOOMALIDA LAGU YIQIIN BAAD MEESHA ISKUUGU KEENTEEN WAAN WAX RUN AH . WAX YAABIHII AAN LA YAABI JIRAY WAXAA KA MID AHAA HADII REERKA QOF KA JIRADO HOOYADA AYAA DHAQTAR U AHEED OO QOF AAD U LIITA (SAKARAAT) AH AYEEY WAXEY HOOYADU LEEDAHAY QOFKANI WAXA HAYO WAA (QARAS) OO WAA IN LA QARAS BIXIYAAA MARKAASAA QOFKII ASAGOO TIISA TACBAAN U AHAA BAA HADAN LA SII DILAYAAA WAXAASI WAA IN WAX LAGA BADALAAAA
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| | Friday, September 29, 2000 - 08:11 am walaahi that's funny neo, the part about u know u r somali when u get calls in the middle of the night from somalia, kenya, iyo ethiopia, and the part about u aknow u are somali when u have canjeero on saterday mornings!! but more ppl it's good and funny!!
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| | Saturday, September 30, 2000 - 10:19 am funny ••••.. i have one too. you know you are somalian when you say saban instea of seven.... ya' all funny molians.... one love i am out.... Ninwaalan....
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| | Tuesday, October 03, 2000 - 02:40 am I LOVE WHAT YOU ALL WROTE BUT GIVE IT UP FOR LAYLA, EVERYTHING YOU SAID IS TRUE, NO MATER WHERE IN THE WORLD YOU ARE LIVING SOMALIS ACT THE SAME AND SAY THE SAME THINGS. BUT I WOULDN'T CHANGE IT FOR THE WORLD, I LOVE THAT WE DO THESE THINGS COS IT MAKES US DIFFERENT FROM TEH REST OF THE WORLD, WE ARE INDIVIDUALS. EVERYONE KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK, MY FAVOURITE WAS, you know you’re somali when your grandmother thinks every skinny white person has AIDS. THAT IS SO TRUE, ONE MORE TO FINISH IT you know you are somali when your parent think going on holiday is visiting another reletive in another city. love you all another layla
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| | Saturday, October 14, 2000 - 11:47 am Hi everyone, This might sound stupid put read it anyway and don't take it seriously. You know you're somali, when waking up 3:00pm in on a saturday. You know you're somali, when going to a wedding just for their xalwo, doolsho, shu'shumo(qumbe) even thought you weren't invited. (How ya know there was a wedding? heard it from a friend of a friend.) (for the falles) You know you're somali when wearing your Macawiis outside. (dixon) You know your somali when you start to say "hey i know that nigga keinan, hake he use to eat canjeelo with us for quraac, we were good friends"...Acting like you know him. You know you're Somali when you marry your cousin. You know you're Somali when you pick your nose without using a cleanix even when you're in public. You know you're Somali when you're asked "What country are you from? and you answer Africa.." You know you're Somali when you have a history of being in a Refugee camp(qaxootiga) that's all i have to say right now. so peace out Jihan
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| | Friday, October 20, 2000 - 09:29 am .....You know you 're somali when you pronounce or say the word put as but. ....You know you're somali when your mother says or calls you every bad word and then hits you for knowing it. ....You know you're somali(girls) when your father flirts with your girlfriends and wants to kill you for flirting with a guy. .... You know you're somali when your husband treats you like a queen for the first days of your marrige but treats like a dirth from that day on. ....You know you're somali when you run away from your husband coupke times in a raw. ....You know you 're somali when you think like the westerns. ....You know you're somali(guys) when your guy friends are with you all the time. ....You know you're somali(girls) when everyone knows what you and your date did last night. ...You know you're somali(girls) when you wear tennise shoes with diirac. ....You know you're somali when corn is your favorite meal. ....You kow you're somali when love means disaster to you. ....You know you're somali when means the totally oppisite thing to you. .....You know you're somali when you try to be a better person but can't go any farther than we you were. ....You know you're somali(guys) when all what you want from a woman is sex. lol to all of you and keep it up. I got a lot to say but I'm out of time . Didn't mean ti hurt any1 if I did.
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| | Wednesday, October 25, 2000 - 09:02 am You know you're somali when you cannot the pronouse The 'P' in English.
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| | Monday, January 22, 2001 - 06:36 am Let me say somthing to all of the somalians specailly you guys you are full of bullshit!! why come on the net and diss each other. I wanna say something to layia what ever your name is where did you get the idea somalians work at Dixons. Get your own JOKES RIGHT you dickhead. I know fucking gal like you who has nothing going for them. •••• you
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