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     | Unrecorded Date I would like to take the opportunity to respond to Mr. Anonymous’ s comment, the man who so unfortunately attacked ladanw@hotmail.com ’s notice to meet a descent Somali man for the sole purpose of establishing a happy home. His comment was the kind of ignorant criticism that has no bases whatsoever and his words just make the majority of good Somali men just look bad. He spoke his mind without a moment of reflection and all reasonable Somali men are no longer accepting such a mean and malicious attack against any member of our community. I am a man of understanding, so are the majority of Somali men and I do hope that they will agree with me my claim that the man came in a forum solely intended for prospective future home builders to exchange acquaintance. He picked a descent offer for marriage that read “ In search of a good, educated, mature Somali man for marriage, who is willing to relocate to USA. Only serious applicants will be considered. Please reply at ladanw@hotmail.com”. And he unnecessarily insults her and discourages her in her attempt to build the home we all wish for our sisters or any female in our community. He was confused between criticizing someone who mad a claim of certain fact and someone who just put few legal and expected words for those interested to respond by email. She provided an email, and she expected those of us interested to send her an email telling her that “I am the right man” and can challenge her to prove that she is the right women. Needless to say, those few men usually spend their time claiming in the coffee shops that the Somali girls are not forthcoming to help their men establish a worthy relationship. Although there is some truth in that claim, which is true in all other communities, I do reject its application in all good Somali girls. I do agree that we are all concerned about the welfare and the security of our women, but look this is the most difficult time in the history of our people. We are refugees scattered in all directions of the world and it is the most difficult time for young Somali men and women in finding each other. This is the time we all demand an institution of our own that we all contribute financially and makes sure that we find each other and we continue to build homes and the existence of our community. He could have mad a research in the ills of looking a husband or wife in this manner and wrote an article we can all read and learn from and posted in an appropriate forum not a forum for notices. I would like to remind the Somali woman that we are not bad people. We are just having the most difficult time in our history. We never had much wealth but we had great deal of dignity and pride. We had reason as the Somali proverb attests “Gaalka dil, bal gartiisa sii” and we had history of affection to our women as I remember Karen Blixen’s celebrated book “Out of Africa” which she wrote that the Somali man might travel miles and miles, days and nights and sometimes months to a far land to sell his animals buys himself a white peace of cloth and buys his wife colored and sometimes silky dress. It was no secret that a Somali wife was able to shield her husband behind her body to protect him against her attackers in times of conflict and force them to leave even though her husband might have killed many of their relatives. This was possible because the Somali men realized that the essence of our existence depended the health and the welfare of our mothers, sisters and wives. Killing them and their children was taboo, the destruction of ourselves so we the Somali men cared, protected and loved them and every Somali man must remember we had little in comfort and affection but them historically. We are in danger of losing all of the things that mad us people as the comment I am replaying truly attests. Now the good news is we are going to overcome this difficult time. We are going to have our senses back, lean from our mistakes and turn it into a positive result. We will forget our differences, we will stop criticizing each other unnecessary and we will build governments, homes and most importantly our pride and dignity again. We will learn from the rest of the world in order to modernize our historical values and we will reject those of us who just saw the world in one window and happen to be everywhere they shouldn’t be dropping comments and criticism unnecessary but demean our people in general and members of our community in particular. We are going to say to them – STOP WE ARE NO LONGER ACCOMODATING YOUR ILLS . We are going to realize that the world had gone what we are going through now and its our time to suffer overcome. We already suffered and it is high time for our people to rejoice. I would encourage the Somali woman to help us find them, marry them and build with them the homes we where denied during this time of conflict and misunderstand. There are a lot of Somali men who are highly cultures, highly polished and well motivated to provide you the best you deserve. Don’t be misled otherwise .. we are here for you. I would like to commend the Somali men and women who put their time and money in establishing the Somali net and those who put good and reasonable words in helping us restore our dignity and pride. I warn the management of the Somali net that this is the window we are watching the progress of our people and the window the world is watching us. It is our interest to make it an institution we can all be proud off. You must sleep and wake up every day in how you can make it better and we must see an improvement of the reliability, appearance and the content of Somali net every day. You took the challenge and we expect you nothing less than the best. You must find a way we can all help you financially, and technically and I suggest that you should not allow comments against notices. A notice is a notice and those interested should respond the means the person posted the notice requested to be communicated. People who post notices don’t like derogatory postings publicly made after their notices. Only require those making the notice should provide an email or other means of communication otherwise put their postings in the dustbin. It all requires a small script to check if someone providing a content gives a legal return address. And one word about the man who motivated this article. Please forgive me for wring this article a little harsher than it deserves. All I want is that you become a valuable contributor in our site. I wish that you spend your energy in providing us your idea, your motivation and advice in the proper forum with compassion and understand well intended to educate your people not a direct attack in one of our members unceremoniously. Kindly do accept my apology again and I wish the whole incident would have never happened. I thank you all and God bless you all. Walaalkiin Jama PS. To see the posting that motivated my article, please point your mouse in Looking for a husband! December 25 - 09:24 pm {http://somalinet.com/library/forums_archive/147/160.html?fridayDecember219980924pm}
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| | Unrecorded Date This is Jama the author of “In defense of Ms. Ladan and the Somali values” above. I regret that I posted the article twice by mistake after making small spelling corrections. If you read this article in its entirety, you must have noticed small inconsistencies in the paragraph that starts It was no secret that a Somali wife was able to shield her husband behind her body to protect him against her attackers in times of conflict and force them to leave even though her husband might have killed many of their relatives. This was possible because the Somali men realized that the essence of our existence depended the health and the welfare of our mothers, sisters and wives. Killing them and their children was taboo, the destruction of ourselves so we the Somali men cared, protected and loved them and every Somali man must remember we had little in comfort and affection but them historically. We are in danger of losing all of the things that mad us people as the comment I am replaying truly attests. The second line should have been To protect him from his attackers .. And the last line must have been Things that made us …. I didn’t intend to be inconsiderate to provide you a well thought and corrected article before posting it in our forum. I am sure that many of you will find some more errors due to my wring difficulties. However, I extend you my sincere apologies for all errors and omissions including how I presented my idea in here. Jama
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| | Unrecorded Date May god bless you Br jama foryour good article and to my good sister, fogive your misled brother. Ipray you get a Somali man who deserves you Ameen.For the misguided Br ,say righteousness or keep quiet. Thank you all & God bless you all.Assalamu Aleikum.
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| | Unrecorded Date Anonymous, thank you for the long article in my defence. I always knew that the majority of somalis are decent, and good to their women (mothers, wives, and sisters).
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| | Unrecorded Date Jama I praise you for your good intentions and Somaliness but I could hardly comprehend the intensity of your response. Brother no offence intended, but why do I think that you might have blown the whole thing out of proportion?. If the reponse you are criticizing is the one down here I wonder what is the ghost that you see in it. I am Somali man myself but I had no problem to see something like this in the cyper space, why? because I have seen much worse stuff around and I don't think it will destroy the world of any sensible Somali person including our sister Ladan - all respect to her. This is the response Jama is refering to. It is made to Ladan by some Anonymous person. __________________________________________________ " As a Somali man, I cannot read this message and not respond. Are you so desperate that you cannot find a man where you are? How are you to know that the applicant is for real? How are you to judge his intentions? How do you intend to assess him and what he has to offer you? Did you ever stop to think and ask yourself these questions?" __________________________________________________
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| | Unrecorded Date you know what?! , you people make me laugh alot..you people aint got nothing to do , right..a female looking for husband on the line, girl you are just aint good enough..and another trying to be smart...you know what , you people live in fantesy thats the west mentality. thats not the reality .. you want something work for it , do it for reall , dont just talk about... i thing you people are despared but you dont wanna admitt..you to be fake and you engoying it..people what i'm saying is, IS THE TIME TO BE REALL.. i hope you people know where i'm coming from .... peace and love for my people....
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| | Unrecorded Date How about if brother Jama and sister Ladanw get together? wouldn't that solve many problems at the same time. Please give us break and stop generalizing all Somalis for what one silly jerk might have done. No need to whine but to move on and fight the fights, that is what many of us in all corners of the world are doing, so behave yourselves and give us some peace of mind. Struggling nomad in this hard-knok world
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| | Unrecorded Date lol@@Nomad, good suggestions though.
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| | Unrecorded Date Nomad i like that...i like what you sayin..
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