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SomaliNet Forums Archives: Before May 2001

Yes, thanks to SomaliNet Communuity, Somalis took advantage of the internet at its infancy!

SomaliNet Forum (Archive): General Discusions: Archive (Before Feb. 16, 2001): A little story
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Anonymous

Thursday, January 25, 2001 - 09:15 am
The Smiths had no children and decided to
use a proxy father to start their family. On the
day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith
kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man
should be here soon."

Half an hour later, just by chance, a
door-to-door baby photographer rang the
doorbell, hoping to make a sale. "Good
morning madam. You don't know me but I've
come to . . ."

"Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting
you," Mrs. Smith cut in.

"Really?" the photographer asked. "Well,
good! I've made a specialty of babies."

That's what my husband and I had hoped.
Please come in and have a seat. Just where
do we start?" asked Mrs. Smith, blushing.

Leave everything to me. I usually try two in
the bathtub, one on the couch and perhaps a
couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room
floor is fun too; you can really spread out."

"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it
didn't work for Harry and me."

"Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a
good one every time. But if we try several
different positions and I shoot from six or
seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with
the results."

"I hope we can get this over with quickly,"
gasped Mrs. Smith.

"Madam, in my line of work, a man must take
his time. I'd love to be in and out in five
minutes, but you'd be disappointed with that,
I'm sure."

"Don't I know!!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed.

The photographer opened his briefcase and
pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures.
"This was done on the top of a bus in
downtown London."

"Oh my god !! " Mrs. Smith exclaimed, tugging
at her handkerchief.

"And these twins turned out exceptionally well
when you consider their mother was so
difficult to work with." The photographer
handed Mrs. Smith the picture.

"She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.

"Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to
Hyde Park to get the job done right. People
were crowding around four and five deep,
pushing to get a good look."

"Four and five deep?" asked Mrs. Smith, eyes
widened in amazement.

Yes," the photographer said, "and for more
than three hours too. The mother was
constantly squealing and yelling. I could
hardly concentrate. Then darkness
approached and I had to rush. Finally, when
the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment,
I just packed it all in."

Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "You mean they
actually chewed on your, ah.... equipment?"

"That's right. Well, madam, if you're ready, I'll
set up my tripod so that we can get to work."

"Tripod??" Mrs. Smith looked extremely
worried now.

"Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my
Canon on. It's much too big for me to hold
while I'm getting ready for action. Madam?
Madam? . . . Good
Lord, she's fainted!!"

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disgust

Thursday, January 25, 2001 - 12:47 pm
you are sick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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X

Thursday, January 25, 2001 - 04:09 pm
loool@@@annonymous..that was funny..helerious.lol..the woman must have being going crazy..lol..Poor confused woman.

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Xoogsade

Thursday, January 25, 2001 - 04:43 pm
@@@@@@@@@@@lol Damn funny

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Anonymous

Monday, January 29, 2001 - 01:28 pm
lolololol@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@uuuuuuuuu Damn !!!!!that was a masterpiece

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MANAXE

Monday, January 29, 2001 - 01:36 pm
Bro you are too dubious in yor dealings, i guess,,That was one of my favourite chokes ,,I almost go to this page for my doze of daily joke,,and now you are really getting into my nerves,,What made you do this,,claiming other people's work as yours..please in future,recognize the author,,the likes of you can be really annoying and stid ,,too silly and emphatic...
The following web page is where he copied,,all of ye;;;;have cool day,,


http://www.lotsofjokes.com/cat_66.htm


Sagatarius,,anather real motherfucker thief in da houz,,,teach da nigga a lesson or two to never do dat again..

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ha ha

Monday, January 29, 2001 - 05:47 pm
who cares you idiot. Gave me a good laugh.I see NObody claiming it as their own-it was just posted. Tripod!!..loooooooool. real funny bro!!

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OLA

Monday, January 29, 2001 - 06:43 pm
A Guy is driving his girlfriend home when she decides she wants to go to her friends instead. Her friend lives out of the way so she tells her boyfriend that she would get naked for him if he drove her. The guy says ok and the girl takes off all her clothes. The boyfriend is so busy looking at her that he stacks the car and gets stuck between the steering wheel and the seat. He tells her to go get help and she replied that she couldn’t because she didn’t have any clothes on. He replies, “Take my shoe and cover your snatch with it, and go for help!”

She takes the shoe and runs to the closest gas station. She finds the clerk and says, "Help, my boyfriend is stuck! Can you help us?" The clerk replies, "I’m sorry, I think he's too far in."

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aussie girl

Monday, January 29, 2001 - 10:32 pm
OLA

haaaaaaaaaaaaaah hhhaaaaaaaaaahaahTHAT WAS REALLY FUNNY haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaahhhhhahaha


keep up the good work