     ABDIRAHMAN | Tuesday, November 21, 2000 - 06:40 am
HI U ALL........I AM A SOMALI YOUNG MAN WHO LIV'S IN LONDON, AND I COULDN'T HELP MY SELF NOTICIMG HOW SOME SOMALI GIRLS WORRY MORE ABOUT THE CULTURE THAN THE RELIGION, A'MEAN I HAVE DATED SOMALI GIRLS FOR AS LONG AS I CAN REMEMBER, AND ONE OF THE THINGS THAT I HAVE COME ACROSS WAS,ONE NAIGHT I WENT TO PARTY AND I MET THIS BEAUTIFUL EDUCATED SISTER,ANY WAY WE STARTED DATING ,WE WERE DATING FOR ABOUT 5 MONTHS WHEN I DECIDED TO GET REAL INTIMATE WITH HER, SO ONE DAY I ENVITE HER OVER TO MY BROTHERS PLACE,AS WE STARTED TO MAKE LOVE SHE SAID TO ME WE WILL NOT HAVE SEX,SO I GOT A LITTLE MAD BECOUSE I WAS DATING THIS GIRL FOR 5 MONTHS, SO I TOLD HER HOW I WAS ANGRY ,THEN WITH OUT ME ASKING HER SHE STARTS SUCKING ON MY DICK,SO I ASK HER WHAT THE FREAK ARE U DOING, THEN SHE REPLY'S I RATHER DO THIS THEN LOSSE MY VIRGINITY BEFORE I GET MARRIED.
MY POINT IS , I HAVE SEEN ALOT OF SISTERS WHO SMOKE DO A LOT OF THINGS THEY SHOULD'NT BE DOING,I HAVE SEEN SOME WHO EVEN DRINK, AND AT THE SAME TIME THEY ARE MORE WORIED OF KEEPING THEIR VIRGINITY THEN THEY ARE ABOUT THE RELEGION.
ANY SISTERS WHO GET OFENDED BY THIS, I DO APOLOGISE BUT I THOUGTH THIS WAS A VERY SERIOUS MATTER THAT HAD TO BE BROUGTH UP,
YOURS SINCERELY,
:ABDIRAHMAN:. |
| Muna | Tuesday, November 21, 2000 - 08:38 am
To Abdirahman:
I would like to say that what you said up there doesn't really happen,especially considering the fact that I am myself a young,Somali woman...but the truth is that a lot this stuff happens.
First of all let me express my frustrations and growing impatience with this double-standard that the Somali society has so conveniently set for the men and the women.I think it's highly unfair,chauvinistic and very unjuste to the women.
More importantly it is very hypocritical of people to encourage a man to make so-called SEXUAL CONQUESTS and applaud him when he does so;and simultaneously show women no tolerance,acceptance or mercy whatsoever if she expresses herself as a sexual being.
Please keep in my mind that the argument I have stated above is strictly from a cultural point of view and has no attachment to the religious perspective.
I feel that for centuries women have been condemned and the men rewarded for exactly the same act.This is a cycle that cannot easily be broken;however,that is where the religion comes in.
Our religion is our light.The Qur'an clearly states that adultery is a sin for both the men and the women that commit it and they will both be punished equally and neither soul will receive anymore than it has worked for.
Somali people have conveniently let culture and religion intertwine and mix so much for so long that it became almost impossible to know where one began and the other ended!This was a very clever way of making sure that women always stayed in their place...which is to be at home,a housewife, mother, dependent, uneducated(even as far as religion goes),they were made to feel inferior and deliberately kept in the dark!
THAT IS NOT WHAT THE QUR'AN SAYS!
My point to you is that if you are here to critcize the actions of your girlfriend then you must quite frankly take a good,long hard look at your own.Somali women are brought to believe that if they give up their virginity they are virtually dragging their family name through the mud and that no man will want to or even consider marrying them after they've given up the only thing they were told was their worth.My dear these women are under a lot of pressure,just as you were pressured that you weren't a man unless you had your first sexual experience even before you passed puberty..or that you weren't a man unless you've actually lost track of the number of women you've been with!
So my question is DOES IT NOT TAKE TWO TO TANGO?
Seriously,in order for a man to become a sexual predator that means there must be prey out there for him to hunt.My theory is..the prey must be a woman right?...so how come the women are expected to be VIRGINS???
I am not here to condone what your girlfriend did,but I'm itching to say that she did it for fear of losing you.See she knew that you would leave her if she didn't give something up..so she took her chances and decided to please you in other ways without having to compromise herself!
Somali women shouldn't have to feel that they need to give up anything...They shouldn't feel so pressured that they choose hellfire over religion for the sake of a man whom I can swear is only there for temporary gratification!I don't mean for you to feel that I am punishing you for every man's sin, but the point is that a lot of brothers are being sexually frivalous and society is clearly cheering them on!
That gets a little too old for those of us who know what our religion states and it's sad to see a sister not feel confident or unable to find the strength to use religion as a tool to advocate for herself.Also, I believe that the reason that sisters sometimes are not strong women is that they didn't really have strong female role models.
If you will just take a minute,people say that everything starts at home..so technically that's where young,Somali women should receive all the moral support and insight they need to survive in this male-dominant society,right?But they don't!
I speak for myself when I say that I didn't see and still don't see my own mother,or my grandmother as strong,female role models whose actions I would like to duplicate and whose mentality I was dying to adopt!And I'm sure that there are a lot of sisters out there who share this sentiment.Nevertheless,I have found my way without having to sell my soul to the devil or compromise my values and prinicples!Young,Somali women are fending for themselves and they make do with the little they have.Once again that is not a justification for your girlfriends actions or similar ones!
I believe I've said enough,so I'll just move over!
For the sisters,here's something to think about...
WE OUT NUMBER MEN,BY ATLEAST 3:1,YET WE ARE CONSTANTLY LIVING AND ABIDING BY THEIR RULES....WHY,WHY,WHY?
Until next time,peace,love and craziness to you all!
Muna. |
| LAMIA | Tuesday, November 21, 2000 - 06:32 pm
I'm gonna make this short. Not only Somali people worry about the culture more than the religion. These days you see lots of Muslims r doing the same thing. I'll tell you why. It's because people around the world are scared about other people and what they are gonna say. You see we are afraid of human like us more than allah. That's a big problem in all muslims communities.
hope this answered your question. |
| Ayaanick | Tuesday, November 21, 2000 - 07:38 pm
first of all I am going to be a bit more harsher then the sister whom I tottally agree with. Now honestly speaking, a real men would never degrade his better half the way that you have. I am soo soo...disapointed in the remarks you made about your girlfriend whom I am sure was only trying to be with you for some odd reason(I don't see it).
Somalain women are taught that men are the miracles the world needs, and without them we can't survive. See for example if a girl reaches about the age 25 and up she is concered "guumays" why?? Who is to say that just because you get married that you are going to live happally ever after.
People will always mix culture with relegion, and so on and so forth, but you my dear have no right in asking your girlfriend to make love to you if weren't married to her at first. Don't you ever look--up, and see that there is a greator power above you who is watching every move you make. Don't you know that you are just a "bilaadn futo ku xaarle" , and that satisfying yourself is not the only thing that world should be concered about.
Why do we put up with men like this girls??? Please just know that you are worth waiting for, and sex is not the only thing,,,,there are other matters that concern us then some bastard who doesn't know any better then scurewing everything that comes his way! aaaahhhh I have said enough>>>>
Ayaanick |
| MeanLove | Tuesday, November 21, 2000 - 08:18 pm
Dear to my peeps.
I will make this short and simple. First of all Abdirahman brothaman, I am very surprise because U embraced ur girlfriend and urself. A real man don't discusses what he did with his girlfriend in the public. Lets comeback to the point about it seems that ur situation didn't had to do anything with religion and culture, because first of all if she was worrying about the religion she wouldn't suck ur cock and not giving U the puzzy. And second the reason why she didn't want to lose her virginity is because she didn't want to rush anything. She may worried about if she have sex with U, U may not be the Mr right for her. Now a days most of r peeps lives in foreign countries, and it seems that more and more somalians r losing the culture and religions.
Peace and love to my peeps
Ps
MeanLove |
| reality check | Wednesday, November 22, 2000 - 04:22 am
Salaam ppl
I too would just like to reinforce something...why dear brother are you complaining about the woman's scruples when u doing the same thing yourself...if you let her give you head...doesn't that make you sink to the same standards as her??? even the fact that u wanted to have sex with her makes u look pathetic and for you to then come on somalinet and state what you did...dear brother...wake up and smell the coffee.
Dear Muna
Times have changed now but back then Muslim women had the most freedom, i mean in france in around 1835, they were still comtemplating whether women should even be considered as human beings. And of course there was the Indian culture where when the husband of the women died and his body ws getting burned...she too had to jump in the fire and kill herself too...however a lot now has been mixed with culture and tradition then claimed as religion.
We muslim women had and still have the choice of deciding who we marry, we couldand can make disicions with our husbands...we were allowed and still allwed to own our own property and land etc, however other women from other cultures did not have the same freedom.
Much of society makes the muslim women seem trapped and a woman who has no mind of her own...our religion has been greatly abused by claiming some traditions are religion...for example female circumcision. |
| IBRAHIM ABDIRAHMAN | Wednesday, November 22, 2000 - 07:10 am
TO ABDIRAHMAN
SHAME ON YOU HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT ABOUT SOMALIAN GIRLS, IT WAS PROPERLY TRUE WHAT HAPPEN TO YOU BUT YOU SHOULD OF KEPT IT TO YOUSELF BRO!!!
ANYWAY ALOT SH*T LIKE THAT HAPPENS IN LONDON BUT WE HAVE TO PRAY FOR THEM!!
PEACE AND LOVE
BY IBRAHIM MOOYO |
| IBRAHIM ABDIRAHMAN | Wednesday, November 22, 2000 - 07:23 am
WALAAL MAXAAD KU HADLEYSAA, MAXAA HABLAHA SOOMAALIDA U CAAYAYSAA. HABLAHA WAY INALA DHASHEEN WAY ANA DHALEEN WAYNA INA DHAQI. MARKA WAXYAABAHA QAARKOOD KA XISHOO DAD MUSLIM AH BAYNU NAHAY DAD WALBA AYAA AQRINAAYA WAXAAD MEESHA KU QORTAY, MARKA QOF WAYN BAAD TAHAY WAX ISKULA HAR. HADAA WAX SECRET AH SHEEGAYSIDNA AF-SOOMAALI KU QOR.
HABLAHA SOOMAALIYEEDOW RAALI AHAADA.
PEACE AND LOVE TO MY SOMALI BROTHER AND SISTERS
FROM AHMEDEY TUBAAKO + IBRAAHIM MOOYO
REPRESENTING LONDON, ENGLAND
ONE LOVE |
| wiil waal | Monday, December 04, 2000 - 02:25 pm
all this things ya'll are discussing is irrelevant and totally disgusting |
| Sharifa | Monday, December 04, 2000 - 09:50 pm
If only you would all do something productive with your time. Stop this nonesense. You're supposed to be God fearing ppl. Live up to your title.
Salams |
| A.J. | Tuesday, December 05, 2000 - 11:53 pm
asalaamu calaykum
Dear: Abdirahman
Brotha da truth hurts as we all know, but I agree with the fact that I also saw them with my own eyes, so "called bad girls", if u r wondering yes I'm a londoner too mate, I saw some of that girls u talking about but why do u have to reveal it bro? u saw one or one hundred can't compare them with the sweet million hijabed girls Mind u some r undercover, so bro, let us just try leave them rotten coz don't even think about advicing them before they flippin call u a "Farah" or "Scrub" coz they need the pound to get their high going if u know what I mean (Weed)...
U know the is one cmpletelly thing that I agree with ya abdirahman 100%>>>
"Why r they worried more about virginity than their religion" that is a hard question and the onlly ones that can answer is them, but also would like to know too...
I have seen this and ignored it, but u just revealed it bro, and I agree with ya, but the part of oral sex I also heard some disgusting thangs about it too... I will leave it to u abdirahman I know u r wondering my advice
"Drop it before u drop some hatred hurting the inoccent ones"
I said enough thnx for ur attention ppl, still one love to my good sister...
Peace N love |
| monifah | Wednesday, December 06, 2000 - 12:51 am
helloo...ABDIRAHMAAN
bro' i agree with u
and what u've said is
totaly true...know
its úp 2 us 2 decide
why o why this happens??
it's bacause our men...
the somalian men,,,
everytime they hear
that a girl had sex they call her
"SHARMUTO"WHAT'S UP WITH THAT!
it takes 2 to have sex right?
then why blame the girls?
a'mean now the girls are
playing this game right
suckin'dudez but not havin'
sex and enjoy it... |
| nadiasomalia | Wednesday, December 06, 2000 - 12:59 am
i only wanna say2
my lost sisters
who is goin'down
2 that nasty level
If u ain't afraid
of Allah then do what eva'
u wanna do...don't give a
a damn about what people says
the people will not take u 2 janno |
| A.J. | Wednesday, December 06, 2000 - 01:14 am
Nadia word up sis I really like the advice u offered that waz real but will they listen or have they tasted something they cannot come back from, I believe ppl change they can too...
Lets all try and change, some of us still after that qabill and now we have something else, Religion vs other unthinkable stuff like what we talkin about... The thing is how could we all advice and listen to one another?
I don't it is gonna be easy it would be if it is any other countries but UZ we just think we know everything and got all, no don't otherwise we wouldn't be here talkin about such a discusting topic instead talk about more intresting things like "Mariage" coz some of us need some knowledge I know i do none is perfect lets discuss about something valuable something that we can benefit from like male (wiil) and female (Gabar) talk about what we think about marriages that r setted up by ur parents or marriages which happen from loving and a long relationship...
What do u think ppl?
Peace N Love |
