Dear Me (SomaliNet version)

[Ismail87]

Am I the only one who took notice of Agent's painting? I'm speechless!

[CilmiDoone]

Dear Abdiwahab at 16,

I am sure that you are passionate about changing the world and combating injustice but you can not change the world. Humans are foul, ungrateful animals who only respond to brute strength and $$. Do not join any political movement but focus on the pursuit of your own self interest and collect every single $ you can get. Remember, money is the only thing in the world that can make the ugly look attractive and the ignoble seem noble. At the end of the day, all humans are the same. We pursue our narrow interests. We look for ways to get more money,power and sex.

As for women, they are all the same. You will never find the "one" so just focus on stacking up your paper and breeding with the best looking women your money can attract.


Sincerely,

Yourself +2*

So true

[Rockstar]

@Abdiwahab.
@AoC; that painting.

[Rockstar]

Dear Rockstar,

Firstly, you need more names. Now, there will be many times that you will get a choice between a good, humane, nice choice, and a bad one, which will make you richer. Pick the latter. In short, fuck everyone. Also, Bitcoins. When it is invented, make sure you buy a lot, and bail out before the summer of 2013.

Regards,
Rockstar.

Shitty letter, but I don't think I would change much. I like the person I am. If I were to change anything, it would be telling my former self to invest in things that I know now would be successful. Which is entirely unfair. Maybe being more hateful would be nice.

[CilmiDoone]

Why do you think being more hateful would be nice?

[Rockstar]

Why do you think being more hateful would be nice?

Get more things done, and self-preservation I suppose. The pyramids were not built with niceties.

[Based]

Also, Bitcoins. When it is invented, make sure you buy a lot, and bail out before the summer of 2013.

I swear to God I was about to write this

Told a relatively successful relative about Bitcoins back in 2010 and briefly considered investing in it myself, but completely forgot about it. Then I heard of the great crash and thought I dodged a bullet and a lot of heartache after the bubble burst, but then read an article the other day about some dude who put in 20 bucks and ended up with 600k.

[ofafrique]

16? Meh. Probably tell my 13 year old self to not fuck up.

[Rockstar]

Also, Bitcoins. When it is invented, make sure you buy a lot, and bail out before the summer of 2013.

I swear to God I was about to write this

Told a relatively successful relative about Bitcoins back in 2010 and briefly considered investing in it myself, but completely forgot about it. Then I heard of the great crash and thought I dodged a bullet and a lot of heartache after the bubble burst, but then read an article the other day about some dude who put in 20 bucks and ended up with 600k.

I read the same article. I was so heart broken.

[Skippa]

"Yo,

You're one f'd up kid, you know that? How pathetic is writing letters to yourself, in pink no less, and passing them off as coming from random girls (who all happen to have the same handwriting)? Let me tell you, it's very pathetic, lame even. And you better end your little game of lacing your buddies' drinks with laxative when they come by your house...In fact, I just sent letters to all three of your victims...enjoy the beat down you little shit! Do yourself and the world a favour, from here on 'til you're about 25 y.o. do the exact opposite of any one thing you're about to do...if your breathing pattern starts with an inhalation, exhale first. drink the pop followed by the fries and eat the burger last; In the toilet for a 1, 2 combo? squeeze the tip of the peen and drop the turd...carry on that way for a while and you might come out a half decent human being...knowing you though, it's of no use I don't even know why I am bothering with this...'fore I go, let me just say...YOU AIN'T SHIT!!! "

[InaSamaale]

Am I the only one who took notice of Agent's painting? I'm speechless!

Wow. I missed that. He's talented. I wonder what other hidden talents SNetters have.

@ Skippa, lol interesting letter. Is there a reason you didn't look to younger self with compassion? Given the limited experience, information, self-identity, do you feel like you could have made better choices?

[Lillaahiya]

He posted that painting in his 'ask me anything' thread that was deleted He's very talented mashaAllah

[Based]

Also, Bitcoins. When it is invented, make sure you buy a lot, and bail out before the summer of 2013.

I swear to God I was about to write this

Told a relatively successful relative about Bitcoins back in 2010 and briefly considered investing in it myself, but completely forgot about it. Then I heard of the great crash and thought I dodged a bullet and a lot of heartache after the bubble burst, but then read an article the other day about some dude who put in 20 bucks and ended up with 600k.

I read the same article. I was so heart broken.

At this point, I'm blindly jumping on any new opportunity regardless of the risk. PM me if you find anything

[BlackVelvet]

The painting? Are we pretending that that wasn't one of the most moving pieces of writing you've ever read.

Agent, you are surprisingly human.



Skippa laxatives? That is such evil genius


Lovely thread InaS



Dear me at sixteen,

Happy birthday! I know you're confused, it will only get worse and no I am not talking about a letter from the future. At every step take hooyo's advice, I know you think everyone should make their own mistakes, very philosophical of you, now slap yourself. She's right, you're wrong. I know it seems like conflicting advice but I will also say be a kid, make mistakes, stop trying to make everything perfect, get messy with life. And when messy is forced on you, just know you'll live through it. Your early twenties are going to suck, not all the time just...we're all born and we all die so just know ** is going, call her more often. And all the hospital visits coming your way, you'll survive that too. Do not park ** on **!!!! Trust me, that's one headache you don't need.

Thanks in advance for the good grades. Get yourself a notebook and stop writing in random places and you're not half bad so keep at it, turns out that is your talent. Don't underestimate the humanities, keep them. You never write that letter so either do it or stop thinking about it. Start deep conditioning your hair, makeup is overrated. I know boys are an annoying inconvenience but don't be so harsh, they are human ergo they have feelings. That said when **, ** yes it did just happen, don't take any prisoners. If you get the chance to live with **, don't. No, as much as you'd like it to be true live and let live not always the case. But through that you picked up some good habits and met very interesting people so go to South America, learn to save. Stop trying not to learn French.

I have attached a list of careers that are not for you, you're welcome. Surprised? Don't be. On the next page is your career turns out we were right all along, since I know how much you love to plan, knock yourself out. Don't start forgetting to eat, it's a bad habit. Forgive **, I know that doesn't make sense since you don't know you're pissed about what he did but all those years ago, he didn't have a choice. Get to know him, he's pretty cool. Make a habit of spending time together. Another thing, heels aren't just for short people but your limit is 3" only because you can't walk in higher, don't ever buy loud shoes no matter how pretty. And boys and girls can be friends if you don't start over-thinking it.

No one is perfect no one's supposed to be. The rest you'll figure out.


Loads of love,

Phase 3 at age **
Dedication: Meredith Brooks - I'm A Bitch


ps You'll have your most embarrassing moment this year. Don't sweat it just roll your eyes, plenty more bloopers to come and I am not even going to give you a heads up, enjoy the show

pps Don't get ** on an empty stomach, don't say I didn't warn you

[Based]

Don't believe me? Take a look.

I'm gonna go ahead and pull the plug on my nascent art career.