Page 3 of 6
Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Fri Nov 12, 2010 9:00 am
by BlackVelvet
Paddington Bear wrote:
It's an issue of trust, BV. You meet someone and are attracted to them. You talk, you go out on dates and you talk some more.
None of the conversations might involve the questions listed in the original post. However, it should be quite obvious if the person is not into faith (for example) or if it's someone who loves kids or if they're very specific about where they want to live. Most of such questions get answered without being answered or asked. It's all about
trust.

You didn't read any of the questions did you?
I think you are referring to instinct and not trust, how can you trust someone if you don't know where they want to go in life, what they think of you and what they're capable of? Maybe it's a man thing? She will cook, she will clean, she will bare children and that's all I need to know.
Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Fri Nov 12, 2010 10:00 am
by Paddington Bear
BlackVelvet wrote:Paddington Bear wrote:
It's an issue of trust, BV. You meet someone and are attracted to them. You talk, you go out on dates and you talk some more.
None of the conversations might involve the questions listed in the original post. However, it should be quite obvious if the person is not into faith (for example) or if it's someone who loves kids or if they're very specific about where they want to live. Most of such questions get answered without being answered or asked. It's all about
trust.

You didn't read any of the questions did you?
I think you are referring to instinct and not trust, how can you trust someone if you don't know where they want to go in life, what they think of you and what they're capable of? Maybe it's a man thing? She will cook, she will clean, she will bare children and that's all I need to know.
I used the word "might" there, you huffy handkerchief.
And, no, not instinct. I am talking about TRUST. Instinct only applies when it is someone you have met for the first time and are debating if you should go on a date with them or not. However, once you take the plunge and go on a date then follow it up with several more, you begin to trust that being alone with this person is fun, safe and must continue. If he generously pays for the food you keep stuffing down your neck on these dates and hardly ever brag about it, you begin to believe that he is indeed generous and caring. All the rest comes with the build of such a trust and the questions in the original post may never need to be asked (you, by then, would already know the answers).

Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Fri Nov 12, 2010 10:35 am
by BlackVelvet
Huffy handkerchief, I must say no one has ever called me that
You know what PB we are saying pretty much the same thing, though I much more reasonable in my argument. The qualities you've mentioned, genorisity, compassion etc are part of a checklist, conscious or otherwise and we're constantly awarding or deducting points during each encounter.
Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Fri Nov 12, 2010 11:13 am
by HELWAA
Previous Relationships
9.Have you been in a serious relationship before?
10.Was it a sexual relationship?
11.What did you learn about yourself?
12.Discuss whether or not you think there is emotional baggage being brought in from other relationships.
No man will answer this walle and i doubt xalimos will admit anything either.
42.Is there anything about your past that I don’t know, but should be aware of?
43.If you could change one thing (anything!) about me, what would it be?

...labadan su'aal baaba ugu daran.Why on earth would anybody change
himself for someone.

Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Fri Nov 12, 2010 11:27 am
by Paddington Bear
BlackVelvet wrote:Huffy handkerchief, I must say no one has ever called me that
You know what PB we are saying pretty much the same thing, though I much more reasonable in my argument. The qualities you've mentioned, genorisity, compassion etc are part of a checklist, conscious or otherwise and we're constantly awarding or deducting points during each encounter.
Exactly. You know, in your rare moments of sanity you do exhibit an impressive mind.
Of course, Olive Oil can save herself all the bother and just insist on a prenuptial agreement.
(HELWAA, what if they were good and never had any?)
Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Fri Nov 12, 2010 11:32 am
by HELWAA
PB
Just Allah knows.But even they had they should keep their mouth shut.
whatever happend in the past should stay in the past.
Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Fri Nov 12, 2010 11:53 am
by Paddington Bear
HELWAA wrote:PB
Just Allah knows.But even they had they should keep their mouth shut.
whatever happend in the past should stay in the past.
We are Somali, HELWAA. A person's past loves are almost always local ones who he/she will bump into for years to come. Have you never sat next to an old lady at a wedding who upon seeing the groom arrive would tab you on the shoulder and whisper "kaa ma arkaysaa? Bari ayaan aabihi wada socon jirnay"!

Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Fri Nov 12, 2010 12:11 pm
by HELWAA
Pb
Pple usually talk shit about the bride then the groom.
Anyway soomalida way hadal badan yehiin, markey labo qof is guursaneyan boqol xaasid
ba soo baxa..nobody pay attention to what they say.
Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Fri Nov 12, 2010 9:01 pm
by samadoon-waaxid
D/P
Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Fri Nov 12, 2010 9:02 pm
by samadoon-waaxid
the absurdity of the logic of these questions is unbearable
and its funny how all the girls ee isu jiibenayaan "yeh girl,we really have to ask these questions.you know!"
so,i have one question for the grown females up in here. do you really think if a man has another wife,drinks,or is tight handed will tell u the truth about it?
ever heard of "naagta been baa lagu soo xero galiyaa,runa waa lagu dhaqaa?"
the reality is any male with average IQ will tell u whatever u wanna hear, and he will pass these questions.only the ones with really low IQ will get caught in these simplistic tests

Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Sat Nov 13, 2010 10:24 am
by Foxy22
Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Sat Nov 13, 2010 10:27 am
by Foxy22
Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Sat Nov 13, 2010 7:00 pm
by samadoon-waaxid
^ u mixin i up with the "kun shiri,kow kala bax" female rule

,and thats exactly why we feel compelled to lie dee,when competetion gets too stiff we have lie our hearts out to win ur hearts. even cavemen did it

Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Sat Nov 13, 2010 7:29 pm
by AhlulbaytSoldier
The way you portray marriage is shocking. All those questions makes it an nightmare.
Re: Things to discuss before marriage
Posted: Sat Nov 13, 2010 7:37 pm
by LobsterUnit
My xalimo will take an iq test, health test, crb too. I will also set up a contingency plans in case of an emergency nuclear attack in the bedroom( methane gas related).