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Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 8:06 pm
by Kabriid
AgentOfChaos wrote:InaXaydar wrote:AgentOfChaos wrote:InaXaydar: Good to know, stay on topic and don't derail BlackVelvet's thread or GTFO.
I don't engage in meaningless discussions. Markaa futada u rux these wanlaweyns and they will cheer while calling you qaldaan.
LOL why you mad though?

Not mad just expressing my opinions.
Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 8:07 pm
by BlackVelvet
Lillaahiya wrote:Huudheedh=who died in broken Somali. They're hand-me-downs/used clothing.
I thought it looked like Huudheey
Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 8:09 pm
by CilmiDoone
People marry for convenience. Whatever is most convenient and most reasonable at that time.
I have a ticklist, love aint in it. She needs to have:
Beauty
Dabeecad
Brains
Ambition
Common understanding... norms, values, outlook on life.
You cant make "love" a condition

What you want is reasonable contentment in that moment in time. Humans are not unique and our emotions are fickle and manipulated by our brain/thoughts.
Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 8:13 pm
by Lillaahiya
BlackVelvet wrote:Lillaahiya wrote:Huudheedh=who died in broken Somali. They're hand-me-downs/used clothing.
I thought it looked like Huudheey
Dee wa isku mid
Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 8:16 pm
by CilmiDoone
BlackVelvet wrote:gurey25 wrote:you should not get married because of feelings, marriages like that usually end bad.
i had no feelings for my wife when we married, 3 years later i am madly in love with her and couldn't imagine being with another woman.
I am happy for you lakin for me just the thought of going through that makes my tummy ache. Isn't it strange living with someone who you don't have any feelings for?
Yes but what do you mean by "feelings". Its vague and unquantifiable. As long as your content, no problem.
Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 8:19 pm
by Kabriid
CilmiDoone wrote:People marry for convenience. Whatever is most convenient and most reasonable at that time.
I have a ticklist, love aint in it. She needs to have:
Beauty
Dabeecad
Brains
Ambition
Common understanding... norms, values, outlook on life.
Humans are not unique and our emotions are fickle and manipulated by our brain/thoughts.
Definitely agree. Beauty is more of a superficial thing if you ask me, I mean some women tend to lose their beauty as they age. Am I going to leave her because of that?
Jawaabtu waa maya. Waan isku dul gaboobeynaa. Timahaan xinne wada marsaneynaa etc.
Embracing aging, together.

Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 8:23 pm
by igotkatzngingersnapz
zulaika wrote:BlackVelvet wrote:They get married because they don't think they'll find anything better
Would you agree with that statement?
there will always be someone or something to one up what you got... "something better" shouldn't be the basis for looking for a suitable partner - it will lead to an endless search. have a checklist(be realistic) and when u find someone who meets your expectation. nab em'
when the stnadards are low
there forms a glass ceiling on the potentiation of happiness
Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 8:30 pm
by CilmiDoone
Zulaika you are a wise xaliimo

I disagree with some of your previous very traditionalist anti-women comments but your growing on me. But you display a very thoughtful, balanced and wise aura in you comment.

Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 8:39 pm
by gurey25
BlackVelvet wrote:gurey25 wrote:you should not get married because of feelings, marriages like that usually end bad.
i had no feelings for my wife when we married, 3 years later i am madly in love with her and couldn't imagine being with another woman.
I am happy for you lakin for me just the thought of going through that makes my tummy ache. Isn't it strange living with someone who you don't have any feelings for?
first step is that you pick a partner that you are compatible with, that you can be friend with at least.
romance and love soon follows..
and you need too be serious about marriage first, if you are into romance and think you are in love at the beginning of the relationship, its a sign that things may not work out when the romance gets stale.
and it will get stale..
Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 8:43 pm
by gurey25
another one of my observations and unsolicited advice.
if you see a marriage where the couple have no conflict and do not fight or argue, it means that there is no love, and the marriage is doomed.
If you see a couple that constantly fight and argue , it means they have issues to sort out, but nothing too serious.
f you see a couple that fight and argue from time to time , it means that this is a normal and healthy relationship and will probably last.
Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 8:53 pm
by Alphanumeric
What's SART?
People get married for a bunch of silly reasons. Better to find someone who shares your outlook and principles, someone you've gotten to know over a long period, rather than someone who looks good on paper and uses pretty words. You can never be certain, so what difference does it make? It's all a gamble anyway. "Compatibility" may very well go out the window once some problems arise. "Love" is only good so long as nothing changes, and that's guaranteed to fail.
Toss a coin. Probably turn out better.
Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 9:16 pm
by igotkatzngingersnapz
^
+ destigmatize divorce

Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 9:25 pm
by blitzkrieg
I'm getting married for tax breaks, tbh.
Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 9:46 pm
by Negritude
blitzkrieg wrote:I'm getting married for tax breaks, tbh.
they gon go soon
Re: SART - Most people don't get married because of feelings
Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2012 11:51 pm
by ElfRuler
Endless reasons to get married. I guess we get married to test the limits of our sanity. The responsibilities that come with it.....
Singlehood with all its scarcity is a child's play in comparison to marriage life. God bless the married folks.