Girls

[BlackVelvet]

Do you think it is sign of control, if you were asked by your husband to be a stay home wife/mother and he will provide you with all your needs?

How many of you will opt to be a stay home wife and why?

People, asking and demanding are different and asking is not a sign of controlling behaviour. It is a request.

Personally depends whether or nor there were kids involved, if there were I would most certainly reduce my work hours willingly but I don't think I would give up everything I have worked for just to say at home no matter how much $$ he had, I'd probably get depressed by it and before the kids there would be no point even suggesting it, he'd have to learn to cook casho at least 3 nights in the week

Maybe I'd change my mind if he were a millionaire then I could become an interior designer like I always wanted...that could count stay at home

[surrender]

No! I would tell him before the marriage that I’m not stay at home mom type, and if accepts me as i am, then is all good.

[GacanSareeye]

It depends on how greedy the girl is, what here needs are and if those needs could be covered by what the husband earns, how extravagant she wants to look, and what she sees here role to be (is she more beneficial just raising her kids or going out there and making a bigger difference). it depends on her background and education, as you can see this is as complicated as it gets, and boils down to the individual. I dont think its a choice the husband can make, and if he does, if it will be okay with the spouse.

hadeer ka hor baa sheikh baa xaafadiisa wacay. the phone rang and rang, but no answer. few people standing around asked what was going since he was constantly calling this number to no avail. he looked at us and said 'it will be answered if no one died'. the moral is, there are guys who would make the choice for before you have a say

[Amethyst]

Do you think it is sign of control, if you were asked by your husband to be a stay home wife/mother and he will provide you with all your needs?

How many of you will opt to be a stay home wife and why?

Best of both worlds, as I'd wanna be around raise my youngins', anyhow. He better go beyond the needs and cover some of the wants too, though.

[Ladane21]

On the real..I think most of girls that posting on this topic are either in high school or in college...I hope to see and hear 3-5 years in your careers how accomodating corporate America is for employees with kids....Man i don't know who you talk to or counseling you...But if you gonna make it big in America...Kids shouldn't be on the picture.

[qoraxeey]

And may I add $$ isn't an issue here...

Girls, please put more thought to your answer and try to see the positive in this.

You are right Isma

its not a money issue

Its about life ... what kind of life is that to just sit at home .. i would die ... my heart would slowly stop beating .lol

that wouldnt benefit me or society... I need to be out there, talk to different people , get new knowlegde everyday & do what i have been learing in school all those years

[Copy.&.Paste]

My adivce to girls with a degree,diploma etc

No matter what work. Even if it's 3 hours a week. If you don't go to work for years you may forget your education won't be able to find work. Any decent man who has wife who has education should let her work. the man might loose his job. Get ill. Die, you might even divorce. Anything can happen. We live in the west now and many people can't depend on family or relatives because they are not around anymore. Create your own safety net...the times have changed.


Work

[Mr. Yungnfresh]

lol you girls are nuts...so if you're working, and I'm working, who the hell is taking care of the kids?! And the who the hell is taking care of my house?! And who the hell is taking care of me when I get home?! My belt isn't gonna unbuckle itself when I get home from work after a long day...if I have to unbuckle it myself, trust it won't be so I can take my jeans off and change

[Amethyst]

lol you girls are nuts...so if you're working, and I'm working, who the hell is taking care of the kids?! And the who the hell is taking care of my house?! And who the hell is taking care of me when I get home?! My belt isn't gonna unbuckle itself when I get home from work after a long day...if I have to unbuckle it myself, trust it won't be so I can take my jeans off and change

Yes, Ismahan def. a sign of control.

[blitzkrieg]

How many of you will opt to be a stay home wife and why?

NO.

Absolutely not.

All of those years of schooling, all of my effort, and all of my parents’ lacag will NOT go to waste. I will not—will NOT—ever, EVER be a stay-at-home wife.

Not that there’s anything wrong with being a home-maker, though; my hooyo’s a stay-at-home mother, and it works for her, but I’m not my hooyo; she didn’t have the opportunities that I do, and I will not let the good things that I have go to waste simply because some man thinks it would be best that I “stay at home”.

[blitzkrieg]

Kids shouldn't be on the picture.

I'm having one.

(You know, just to pass on my fabulous genes. )


And then he's getting a vasectomy.

[Mr. Yungnfresh]

lol you girls are nuts...so if you're working, and I'm working, who the hell is taking care of the kids?! And the who the hell is taking care of my house?! And who the hell is taking care of me when I get home?! My belt isn't gonna unbuckle itself when I get home from work after a long day...if I have to unbuckle it myself, trust it won't be so I can take my jeans off and change

Yes, Ismahan def. a sign of control.

You women make control sound so negative...isku xishooda

[Amethyst]

Oh whatever, Yung!


Blitzkrieg...looooooool@ vasectomy. You were planning on marrying a Somali guy too, weren'tcha?

[qoraxeey]

Youngfresh

nin xuun ba tahay

[Cirwaaq]

Question is who benefits most from a marriage? Who actually wants it? Who needs it?


Compromise


Demands

There is nothing wrong with having a Young Latino baby sitter and sure i would love to get home at least 2 hours before wifey. It is all good. Big happy family.

Men gain either way