How The Hell Do People Move On?

[1nemansquad]

Salaams.

Do share whatever wisdom or experience you have interms of moving on. I'm strong but only on the outside and on the inside am falling apart. I don't seek help from anybody, I'm pretty busy with my work and caring for my little boy. I stay active and play sports, do activities when I have time with only my male mates. I avoid women altogether, if and when I get approached by one I scare them off. My Iman gets weak at times and I ask such questions like 'Ya Allah why me'? and then quickly I say Istaq furulah and remove those thoughts.

In conversations my mind wonders off, for the most part I seem lost, my work was suffering a year ago and somewhat still is to the point where my boss begged me to seek professional help and speak to someone. Everytime a family member or a friend attempts to speak to me or wants to have a chat I don't allow it. I'm humbled by the weight I'm quietly carrying around, all seems well on the outside and its impossible to notice that I'm barely hanging on because of the act I'm putting on but I'm emotionally spent.

All of that is nothing though. My happiness is my little boy, my greatest accomplishment and I'm thankful to Allah (swt) everyday but lately, its painful to be around him at times for the reason that I remember so much when I'm around him although its been nearly 2 years and I'm in constant pain. Maxaan Sameykaraa?

Its safe to say these things here, none of you know me.

btw, I'm not divorced, just incase your wondering.

[Enlightened~Sista]

What is vexing you walaal?

[Basra-]

Looooooseeee weigggggggggggggggght!

[Hyperactive]

what is exactly bothers you?

you haven't mention what is the issue is ? ma naakta is haysatan?

[salool]

Nothing wrong with seeking professional help, therapy can help you to get the bottom of ur underlying issues.You need help to get over your grief.

[Basra-]

saloool

Maybe you should introduce him to your therapist.

[AhlulbaytSoldier]

You need second woman. Ur current wife bores you to death. So what u need nigga, is a young girl 18years old. She will take away your stress.

[salool]

basra, therapist uma baahni ee kaaley oo mac isii

[Basra-]

basra, therapist uma baahni ee kaaley oo mac isii

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL saloool don't u take bi polar medicine???

[FarhanYare]

basra what is the op on about

[Basra-]

faraax


iskaa waraan. I missed u.

[FarhanYare]

.

[DisplacedDiraac]

Widowed perhaps?

If so.. I would recommend seeking professional help.. Sometimes time isn't always the greatest of healers.. especially if a loved one left in a unexpected way and/or they left a massive gap in your life no one else can fill..

In our culture it may seem that seeking professional help makes one soft/weak and whatnot.. But who really cares.. All that matters is sorting yourself out not just for your child but also for yourself.

Seeing a therapist works.. I know several people who have been going to one for a long time and walahi they are doing amazing and they swear by it..

All the best walaal.

[Leftist]

1onemansquad,

It sounds like depression to me, bro. It's a taboo in our community. Instead of dealing with the real reason, " Waalagu ileysday. Jinni aa kuugu jira. Shaydaanka iska naar." <----- all BS. Keep in mind that an entire life is depending on your mental health. If you seek help and resolve the mental/emotional turmoil, he'll have a happy childhood. If not, the ramifications of a turbulent childhood/adolescence will impact the rest of his life. The best thing you can do for him is to invest in your mental health & stability.

Like others have mentioned, go see a therapist. From there, you can determine if you just need lifestyle changes(diet, weight-loss, exercise, sleep schedule) or something more(psychiatrist, etc).

Allah macak.

[Thuganomics]

Reading between the lines.It sounds like you lost your wife and the mother of your little boy.Hope I'm wrong
Anyway just hold strong to your Iman ad Tawakal 3alalaa sxb