the sexual relationship between muslim married couples.

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COSTA
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the sexual relationship between muslim married couples.

Post by COSTA »

Dr. Heba Qo6ub who spoke about the sexual relationship between couples. I of course made sure to attend and write notes so that I can help my fellow bloggers and spread awareness. Razz
First of all, I'd rather this be written in Arabic because the lecture was in Arabic and so are some of my notes but I guess I'll just do the Arabic/English version because it takes me so long to type in Arabic. Sorry in advance.

Certain points she talked about:
-Men are selfish.
-Motherhood is an instinct while fatherhood comes with practice.

She also referred to the Quran, I will type that in Arabic then explain it the way she did.

نساؤكم حرث لكم فأتوا حرثكم أنى شئتم وقدموا لأنفسكم واتقوا الله واعلموا أنكم ملاقوه وبشر المؤمنين

The first part she talked about was the word {nisa'ekum} and explained how this has to do with men being possessive and how it was meant to show them that it's talking about THEIR women. Then she says {7arth lakum} tyee min an ya7ruth mithil il zira3a, and that they produce babies? Or something like that. {Fa aatuu 7arthakum} is ina ya3ni bima anna the women are yours and intaw ta7rethonhum fa ya3ni ta3alaw ib hal 7arth or something very weird like that and it has to do with sex. {aanna shi'tum} this part was elaborated very well or maybe I was just paying attention. She says that this has to do with the way sex is understood in Muslim communities. And that in order for you to have sex, you have to have three basics: 1) Al makan 2) Al zaman 3) Al kayfeya.

Al makan: she kept saying ina we should change rooms and have sex in the kitchen and the shower. This enhances the marriage. We should also have sex in hotels and public bathrooms. Lol okay I added the public bathrooms bas ya3ni I guess if you're gonna do it in the kitchen then you might as well!
Al zaman: she said that the reason people associate sex with 'night' is because of an old jewish understanding that men aren't supposed to touch women in daylight and that also they shouldn't touch them when they're naked but have them wear something that covers their entire body with a hole in it. li'ana basically you only have sex for babies. Wth lol? The point is you should have sex at all times and wear whatever you want or lack of it.
Al kayfeya: she referred to sex positions and LOL she kept referring to 'girl on top' as the cowgirl position and I couldn't help but laugh! 7asaitni 13 year old in Biology! =<
Also ti6areqat ila 7adeeth 3an ina rayal ra7 7ag il rasoul ooh gala ina ( bi hal mi3na) yigdar ina yidkhal ib murta min daberha, and then il rasoul –sallalahu3alaihiwasalam- gal ina idkhil 3alaiha min daberha fe qubulha? Or something similar to that. Which means ina the position would be min warah laken bil vagina and not anal. 3ala golat il lecturer 'doggystyle'. Inrid 7ag il aya. {wa qademu li'anfusekum} itgool the reason it wasn't wa qademu li nisa'ekum or lil nisa' was because inrid wingool ina men are selfish and if that was how it was said then they wouldn't have done it. Bas by qademu it means foreplay and ina kither ma zad il foreplay kither ma zad min the pleasure of the woman ooh fee hal 7ala yizeed min the pleasure of the man himself fa that’s what qademu li'anfesekum means. {wa itaqu allah wa3lamu anakum mulaquuh wa basher al mo'meneen} well its self explanatory bas ya3ni DO IT.

Other points:
-Women take longer to orgasm than men.
-Men need to be sweet-talked.

Now, The Q&A part of the lecture was by far the funniest and most interesting!
Q1: Hal al tafkeer bi imra'a ukhra athna' al mo3ashara 7aram? Ay al khiyana al jinsiya?
A: Radat 3alaiha ooh galat that that is called sexual fantasy and that it is 100% 7alal.It enhances the sex life. Also, that as long as it's a _FANTASTY_ there's no problem.She also mentioned that masochism and foot fetish (lol refer to one of my previous posts) are also 7alal and should be done if the husband miyoola chithe ba3ad shinsawi ya3ni! Razz

Q2: How do we turn on a man? LOL
A: Likul rajul 6areeqa mo3ayana and that we should ask the guy we're with 'what turns you on babe' and then use it. Oh and we should talk during sex to understand what our spouse likes and to make him understand what WE like.

Q3: My husband likes to show public affection and likes to touch me in public and I always try to avoid it so will this affect our sex life?
A: Yes, and that we shouldn't avoid it we should EMBRACE it. Nirja3 win3eed ina i7na 7idoodna il 7aram and as long as we're both enjoying it and it's not 7aram, mako moshkila.

Q4: How many sex positions are there? And what are they? LOL
A: Jawabha was that there are sites that illustrate them and that they are too many to mention or count. They depend on physicial fitness, height and weight. Also, some of them may be 7aram so we should always make sure to check what goes where! Oh and for the first 6 months of marriage we shouldnÂ’t experiment with sex positions (this was new and helpful information to me) because the vagina at the beginning isnÂ’t flexible and it might get ruptured or something. It needs practice and we should stick to 'missionary' and 'cowgirl' (lol her words)

Q5: How do we know if our fiance is sexually challenged? <- poor thing. A: She said that it is impossible to know before marriage laken after marriage it's itha makan feeh iqbal 3al jins and if (well obviously) it's bad and you don't orgasm most of the time if not all of it. Also, reasons of failure 3ind men are: khalal watheefi, khalal 3ithwi, khalal nafsi.

Funny questions were:
1) How do we have sex in a swimming pool?
2) Are there certain sex positions that determine if our baby will be a boy or girl?
3) I once peed right after having sex in front of my husband. Will this affect our sex life?

There was actually an interesting answer to number three
___________________________________________
Last edited by COSTA on Tue Oct 17, 2006 1:28 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Post by Steeler [Crawler2] »

I would never marry a woman I did not have the opportunity to test drive.
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Post by COSTA »

""Bas by qademu it means foreplay and ina kither ma zad il foreplay kither ma zad min the pleasure of the woman ooh fee hal 7ala yizeed min the pleasure of the man himself fa thatÂ’s what qademu li'anfesekum means.""


foreplay is the one thing women can't get enough of., there are a few other things as well, but foreplay is an important one.

""
3) I once peed right after having sex in front of my husband. Will this affect our sex life?""

Thats disgusting
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Post by Cawar »

^^You are posting the disgusting things, so what does that make you??
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Post by Steeler [Crawler2] »

And she didn't talk about oral sex at all. Women love it!
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Post by Suga_lumps »

im sorry 2 say but with the mixture of arabic and english i hardly understood a thing!! Laughing Laughing

i have a question though! did she mention anything about oral sex in muslim marriages..or does anybody here know, cos i've heard so many points about it being alrite from sum ppl and it being haram from others?
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Post by smooth »

^

Its permissable! hope that made your dream come thru Laughing Razz

for god sake "foot fetish" permisable? Laughing Laughing unbelievable!
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Post by Cawar »

[quote="Suga_lumps"]im sorry 2 say but with the mixture of arabic and english i hardly understood a thing!! Laughing Laughing

i have a question though! did she mention anything about oral sex in muslim marriages..or does anybody here know, cos i've heard so many points about it being alrite from sum ppl and it being haram from others?[/quote]

You probably heard it from a boy friend that its permissible. Laughing


However, there is no clear ruling on that as far as I know, eventhough one could assume it would probably fall under the category of Haram/makrouh actions.
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Post by smooth »

^

most sheikhs say its permissable aslong as u dont bust in her mouth Laughing
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Post by Steeler [Crawler2] »

It's Makruh. The Prophet simply never talked about it.
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Post by BLUE RUSH »

costa why are you going to women websites Confused its been proven your pathetic Rolling Eyes ..!!
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Post by COSTA »

[quote="Suga_lumps"]
i have a question though! did she mention anything about oral sex in muslim marriages..or does anybody here know, cos i've heard so many points about it being alrite from sum ppl and it being haram from others?[/quote]

You dont need to ask that any sheekh its Haraam
and its disgusting too Shocked
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Post by COSTA »

[quote="BLUE RUSH"]costa why are you going to women websites Confused its been proven your pathetic Rolling Eyes ..!![/quote]
Naaya ilka cas its not women only website

its for everyone even af-dheer´s sister like you
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Post by BLUE RUSH »

so what made you go into a womans article u idiot Rolling Eyes

BTW i don't have ilko cas Confused
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Post by Steeler [Crawler2] »

Costa
Where is your evidence?

It is not haram, it is Makruh
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