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Meta hasn't even explained it properly. Does the man want to be in the child's life? Is the mother refusing that? Is she holding the child for ransom? Does he want to pay for the child? Is she on benefits?

Insomniac wrote:Meta hasn't even explained it properly. Does the man want to be in the child's life? Is the mother refusing that? Is she holding the child for ransom? Does he want to pay for the child? Is she on benefits?

metamorphosis wrote: Her ex husband did not pay for her mehrr and when she asked he said he will pay her meher when he claims the baby on taxes and she said never. And they said he wont claim the baby ever.

I'm guessing he would only claim the child if he could get benefits from it.

CushiticReflections wrote:

Insomniac wrote:Meta hasn't even explained it properly. Does the man want to be in the child's life? Is the mother refusing that? Is she holding the child for ransom? Does he want to pay for the child? Is she on benefits?

metamorphosis wrote: Her ex husband did not pay for her mehrr and when she asked he said he will pay her meher when he claims the baby on taxes and she said never. And they said he wont claim the baby ever.

I'm guessing he would only claim the child if he could get benefits from it.

Yikes! Sad case.

The guy is baiscally saying, let me claim that I support the child financially entitling him to get a few thousand in his tax return. Once he gets that money, he will allegedly use it to pay the dowry. Now, the guy doesn't even support the child financially so to the girl he is saying, let me give you less than you deserve. She sees it as, he owes 5k (just a figure), and I still deserve 2k from the tax return (just a figure), and he wants me to pay for part of my mehr since I deserve the tax return. Funny guy. He should just pay the mehr and forget about the tax return, otherwise he needs to pay more 50% of the childs expenses.

Ofcourse he would pay for his childs upkeep infact the government would make sure he pays this if he is able.

saacJabshee wrote:Ofcourse he would pay for his childs upkeep infact the government would make sure he pays this if he is able.

Thats if she goes to court to force him to pay childs support.

Well am saying either way he would end up paying for the child support.

Walle divorces are so ugly. One of the things that scares You about marriage.

@ him not supporting his child

@ him not paying the meher from the get

@ her asking for her meher after getting a divorce

@ her using the kid against the ex

Overall ugly situation.

Perfect_Order wrote:The guy is baiscally saying, let me claim that I support the child financially entitling him to get a few thousand in his tax return. Once he gets that money, he will allegedly use it to pay the dowry. Now, the guy doesn't even support the child financially so to the girl he is saying, let me give you less than you deserve. She sees it as, he owes 5k (just a figure), and I still deserve 2k from the tax return (just a figure), and he wants me to pay for part of my mehr since I deserve the tax return. Funny guy. He should just pay the mehr and forget about the tax return, otherwise he needs to pay more 50% of the childs expenses.

That's despicable and unbecoming of a father. She should just let it go if that is the case. I doubt this matter could be brought to court.

Lillaahiya wrote: @ him not supporting his child

@ him not paying the meher from the get

@ her asking for her meher after getting a divorce

@ her using the kid against the ex

Overall ugly situation.

Makes you think about the kind of men she is attracted to.

Ironic to fight over Mehr when they're divorced. She should have requested an upfront Mehr payment but since she didn't she should try find a solution that keeps everyone happy even it means letting go of her entitlements to a Mehr altogether. Perhaps consult a local scholar with regards to advice on the matter. Money comes and goes. She is stuck with this douchebag sounding guy as the father of her kid forever, might aswell try getting along with him.

They both need to get out of the gene pool and stop having babies.

meta, needs to explain more. cause i do t understand why she wasn't given the mahr to begin with or was "makhar/ mo'jal" and why not worry more the child support, which is he is accountable in front of Allah.

i dont understand, is this some sort of somali culture?

lillahiya, you just said what i was thinking of it!

Insomniac wrote: Makes you think about the kind of men she is attracted to.

There are shitty husbands who make good dads though. In this case he was prolly a shitty husband and how a douche of a father.