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Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 10:46 am
by SavySallySupersedes
STARKAST wrote:Don't let your father/mothers problems influence your life.
What Sir-Luggoyo holds importance, find Allah and a devout man will come.
Also men just don't up and leave.....These days Somali women bare part of the brunt of the rise of divorces and separations in our community specially in the Canada - home of assimilation into gaalo culture..
You can't possibly think that's an actual solution. The attachment, involvement and presence of our parents is the common dominator in every other relationship we choose to build later in life. This is the only bond in which we carry with us for the rest of our lives. It affects the decisions we make, our childrearing patterns, (un)healthy attachment to our significant others. This is who defines who we are. Our willingness to be consistent, loyal, and committed.
Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 10:56 am
by SavySallySupersedes
BigRedBook wrote:
Give it a rest. This ridiculous logic would never be accepted anywhere else other than your cushy western world. It isn't a problem. You are making it a problem by blaming your present, personal shortcomings on things that don't matter. Personal responsibility; ever heard of it? You seem like the type who would make excuses for criminals, and blame their criminality on their parents, environment or society. I read your posts and all I see are a bunch of excuses for your failures and buzzwords to back them up. It is weak and disgusting.
Did I hit a nerve? Why don't you post under your real username? You're all over the board. I'll try to be concise.
1. Yes, I do engage in personal responsibility. Being punctual, abiding by traffic laws, and meeting deadlines is personal responsibility. What I'm talking about isn't personal responsibility on my part, it's on my father's. Children have obligations over
both of their parents. Somali fathers aren't exempt.
2. We don't have control over our beginnings. Our race, gender and socioeconomic status are predetermined in the first 5 years of our lives--the most crucial in development.
3. We are not self-made success stories. We are indebted to our teachers, our parents, our neighbors, our peer group. We can't build ourselves alone. It's not only impossible but it's a detrimental concept when internalized.
4. Yes, I have grown up privileged enough to talk about issues like this so openly. I've had all of my needs met, to have the means to work towards a college degree, and friends who create space to talk about the importance of everyone's lived experiences.
Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 12:06 pm
by STARKAST
In the kindest of terms your psychologically balanced but emotionally wretched.
Men take note, as the saying goes when you marry, you're actually marrying the family. In other words your actually marrying the problems or the wealth.
BigRedBook has a valid point(S) how ever you refute, you can't dispute life experience.
I'll take a deduction that you've never visited and stayed in Somalia for a period of time ?
Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 12:13 pm
by Sheikh Mustafa
STARKAST wrote:In the kindest of terms your psychologically balanced but emotionally wretched.
Men take note, as the saying goes when you marry, you're actually marrying the family. In other words your actually marrying the problems or the wealth.
BigRedBook has a valid point(S) how ever you refute, you can't dispute life experience.
I'll take a deduction that you've never visited and stayed in Somalia for a period of time ?
Adeer waaad Sheegayso Luguma Fahmaayo. Hadii aadan Englishka aqoon waxaad tiraahdaa Afsoomaali hala iigu qoro.
Gabadhu waxay kuleedahay, aabaheey ayaa masuuliyadiisii gabay. Xaqii aan kulahaa mahelin. Hooyadeey ayaa ila soo rafaaday. Arintaasi cabsi ay igu abuurtay in aanan raga aaminin lacala in uu Ninkaygu iska dhaqaaqo sidii abaheey isaga dhaqaaqay. Ofcourse Child's experiences ( Horrific or pleasant) plays abig role in the Child's future life. You know what is bad and good because you have been taught when you were young. You fear snakes because you got bitten as a child. And So is Fathers walking out of their Child's life. I don't think I can explain better than that. Maybe one of the Qaldaan Forumers can chip in Qawdhan Dialect.
Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 12:22 pm
by STARKAST
Says the person who only speaks Somali and
broken English ? I don't take orders.

Baax
I don't need your version of Social learning theory, its been explained 2 centuries ago.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_learning_theory
No I don't think you can explain anything Xaji. Not my fault if your emotional too...Most successful people had a less than ideal childhood !
Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 12:33 pm
by Sheikh Mustafa
STARKAST wrote:Says the person who only speaks Somali and
broken English ? I don't take orders.

Baax
I don't need your version of Social learning theory, its been explained 2 centuries ago.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_learning_theory
No I don't think you can explain anything Xaji. Not my fault if your emotional too...Most successful people had a less than ideal childhood !
and Wikipedia is your Intellectually Trusted Source? Do you know anyone can edit and add shit to it . We still need some qaldaan percifier.
Englis iyo Somali Kulahaa. I speak 4 languages.
1) Somali - waan kusalaamay sxb Qawdan
2) English- I salute you in the name of the her highness the khat addict
3) Nina Kusilimia kwa Jina la Miraa Iliyowamaliza Meno
4) Atindonikab Kalenjin Achame Kutinyon Miraa Chemuge
Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 12:34 pm
by Rabshoole
Is it bad that, I never made love?
No I never did it
But I sure know how to fuck
I'll be your bad girl, I'll prove it to you
I can't promise that I'll be good to you
Cause I have some issues I won't commit
No, not havin' it
But at least I can admit
That I'll be bad no to you (to you)
Yeah I'll be good in bed
But I'll be bad to you
Bad that, I never made love?
No I never did it
But I sure know how to fuck
I blame the new trend of music that's corrupting your head.

Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 12:39 pm
by Basra-
Armaan wrote:
Is it bad that, I never made love?
No I never did it
But I sure know how to fuck
I'll be your bad girl, I'll prove it to you
I can't promise that I'll be good to you
Cause I have some issues I won't commit
No, not havin' it
But at least I can admit
That I'll be bad no to you (to you)
Yeah I'll be good in bed
But I'll be bad to you
Bad that, I never made love?
No I never did it
But I sure know how to fuck
I blame the new trend of music that's corrupting your head.

''

Did Geo write this?

Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 12:40 pm
by STARKAST
Just as Grant said Wiki is a convenient and fairly up to date source. Its 2013 not 2008 Wikipedia.
Also i don't converse with males with problems just females because their the ones i expect need help not 33 yr old grown men.
Yes Music and even Pornography are facets that have misguided minds among youth in the diaspora and the west (natives).
Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 12:42 pm
by SavySallySupersedes
STARKAST wrote:In the kindest of terms your psychologically balanced but emotionally wretched.
Men take note, as the saying goes when you marry, you're actually marrying the family. In other words your actually marrying the problems or the wealth.
BigRedBook has a valid point(S) how ever you refute, you can't dispute life experience.
I'll take a deduction that you've never visited and stayed in Somalia for a period of time ?
Gee, thanks? Being in college, I've learned that life can come full circle if you allow it. However, that takes a lot of insight, patience and genuine compassion.
I'm not sure what valid points he has? I was actually born in Somalia in '91. Arrived in America in '96.
Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 12:53 pm
by STARKAST
Too many variables, not enough time specially with your uncomfortable wages/salary.
No sorry, you yourself are not seeing them as Valid but to me they are somewhat concrete.
Marriage is half of your deen, then at that time i believe you may be most happy.
Spend 1 year in Somalia with your family there, and you'll come back as Biir as they say, with a serene state of mind.
Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 12:58 pm
by SavySallySupersedes
STARKAST wrote:Too many variables, not enough time specially with your uncomfortable wages/salary.
No sorry, you yourself are not seeing them as Valid but to me they are somewhat concrete.
Marriage is half of your deen, then at that time i believe you may be most happy.
Spend 1 year in Somalia with your family there, and you'll come back as Biir as they say, with a serene state of mind.
You can't possibly make any assertions about the person I am based on what I post under a pseudonym. Lolz, srsly.
Thanks, but no thanks. I like my comfortable, safe life here in the States.
Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 1:30 pm
by STARKAST
Thanks, but no thanks. I like my comfortable, safe life here in the States.
This one comment says alot. Somala is actually extremely safe above Galkayo. Think about it if you from below there plan for 5 years.
Not my fault you hate yourself aka Somalia aka Somali.
Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 1:37 pm
by SavySallySupersedes
STARKAST wrote:
This one comment says alot. Somala is actually extremely safe above Galkayo. Think about it if you from below there plan for 5 years.
Not my fault you hate yourself aka Somalia aka Somali.
So, why do you think my mom is Hawiye? Don't inbox that kind of shit, you fucktard.

I didn't look to men who didn't care about me for love and comfort? That I'm extremely close to my family?

I've never spent a night away from home?

I turned out to be a well-adjusted, intelligent and wonderful young woman without my father?

I'm waiting until marriage?

Re: Am I the Only Person Who Has a Fear of Commitment?
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2013 1:55 pm
by STARKAST
Another Somali woman hating Somali men. Whats new, can someone tell me that ?