Can a man love/care for a woman and hate her people?

[BlackVelvet]

its just hatred and bitterrness

You say that like it's nothing. Harbouring such feelings can't be healthy for the person or the marriage. Ultimately that's your children's reer abti/adeer

Why not just stick to your own qabiil?

[James Dahl]

Lots of slave owners had sex with their slaves, and that didn't stop them from keeping them as chattels.

One important point is Sterling never would have married his girlfriend, he just wanted to sleep with her.

[SecretAgent]

Sterling has a wife whos the current ceo of clippers shes now suing his girlfriend

[Murax]

its just hatred and bitterrness

You say that like it's nothing. Harbouring such feelings can't be healthy for the person or the marriage. Ultimately that's your children's reer abti/adeer

Why not just stick to your own qabiil?

I prefaced My statement with "right or wrong" meaning thats the reality unethical as it may be. As for Me saying it like its 'nothing' for Me personally I would rather someone hate me and be bitter towards Me than to think I'm property and the women of My race are just sex objects. Furthermore I don't know why You're attacking Me personally for simply stating what the reality is about how society is all about.

[YummyMummy]

This question is similar to ones I have answered before about "would you marry outside of the qabiil/outside of Somalis" etc. Answer is I prefer to marry within my larger qabiil, simply to avoid all these issues. Not that it makes a huge difference to most parents this day & age but if it came to it, I would side with my parents as they existed longer and are more 'guaranteed' than any relationship with any man could be. Simples.

[BlackVelvet]

its just hatred and bitterrness

You say that like it's nothing. Harbouring such feelings can't be healthy for the person or the marriage. Ultimately that's your children's reer abti/adeer

Why not just stick to your own qabiil?

I prefaced My statement with "right or wrong" meaning thats the reality unethical as it may be. As for Me saying it like its 'nothing' for Me personally I would rather someone hate me and be bitter towards Me than to think I'm property and the women of My race are just sex objects. Furthermore I don't know why You're attacking Me personally for simply stating what the reality is about how society is all about.

I wasn't doing it consciously

Now that I read back it does seem confrontational. I guess I can see you marrying some unsuspecting Hawiye girl who hasn't realised there are angry and bitter people out there. I really wish you wouldn't but not like I can stop you or protect her

My apologies for snapping at you

[Murax]

Jasmine,

The fact that You analyzed My post where I was talking about society at large globally, looked at My clan and then started looking at the possiblity of Me marrying Your clan and what My mindset is. The fact that You were able to divert from the topic at hand in such a manner shows that You have a bigtime clan disease.

[BlackVelvet]

Murax, you and I have been on this forum for a long long time. We know each other as well as any two people can on a forum so you know my reasons for saying what I did.

[Murax]

Murax, you and I have been on this forum for a long long time. We know each other as well as any two people can on a forum so you know my reasons for saying what I did.

Thats true. However Somali politics is clan politics and Somalis are not politically mature enough to seperate the two. So there may have been times I went down that road in discussions on Somali politics but for several months I have completely removed myself even from Somali politics. However never, when it comes to My dealings with Somalis has clan been something existent to Me. Not in friendships, marriage, etc. My best friend is Isaaq, he bashes MSB, Marehans to My face yet we're best friends, I don't even care about that. For You to attribute things I said on this forum in the past to My life outside this forum is a insult. The fact that You would think that if I married a Hawiye girl I would hate her family and people and subconciously resent Her for that is just absurd.

[BlackVelvet]

Murax, you and I have been on this forum for a long long time. We know each other as well as any two people can on a forum so you know my reasons for saying what I did.

lol: Thats true. However Somali politics is clan politics and Somalis are not politically mature enough to seperate the two. So there may have been times I went down that road in discussions on Somali politics but for several months I have completely removed myself even from Somali politics. However never, when it comes to My dealings with Somalis has clan been something existent to Me. Not in friendships, marriage, etc. My best friend is Isaaq, he bashes MSB, Marehans to My face yet we're best friends, I don't even care about that. For You to attribute things I said on this forum in the past to My life outside this forum is a insult. The fact that You would think that if I married a Hawiye girl I would hate her family and people and subconciously resent Her for that is just absurd.

Fair enough politics can be clannism but it doesn't have to get personal. However I'd argue that can only be true if there is no hatred or bitterness. If you can blame an entire qabiil for something I think it would be impossible to separate even your own spouse from that generalisation. That's the point I was trying to make, you can't hate or be bitter towards a qabiil and argue that it has nothing to do with your wife/husband who's from that qabiil. Somewhere deep down or very much on the surface you are holding it against them the same way you're holding it against the X number of other people you've never met.

[theyuusuf143]

rivals intermarry, it feels cool when you f.... with the enemies women, i prefer marrying dhuloos wiman than Hj its so sexy isnt it.

[SummerRain]

This Donald sterling guy is clearly racist towards blacks and minorities but he can't seem to stay away from their women. And he is not alone it seems, even as far back as the days of slavery, there were masters who took black females as lovers and some even loved them more than their white wives.. And in our culture, you'll see a man married to a woman of different qabil, he will love her and take care of her and at the same time loath her family. So do men see women without affiliation?..she is with him, she is for him and him alone? The women who are with such men have their reasons I suppose.. blind love or bottom line. I am not knocking either of em'

But I will say this V. Stiviano character is one bad gold digger

Habeen wanaagsan reer Snet!

Culturally I have seen plenty of inter-qabil marriages that have fallen through the cracks because of hate/ bitterness for each other's families. I think those people deserves each other for their diseased hearts and ignorance. People have different notions of what happy marriage is and and should be and I'm of those who believe having a healthy relationship with in-laws strengthens it. I couldn't possibility marry a man who harbors any ill feelings for those I love, there is no way he would make me happy or I would respect him. Luckily, i have no associations with such folks.

[greenday]

also, can person love their mother and hate her people, i heard from somalis all the time.

This is the worse case ever, how anyone can hate their abti, ayeeyo, awoowe is beyond me. They must not really love their mother.

[ManD333q]

Get married to the enemy sistahs and become an object for ciil iyo cadho bax

[Marques]

Get married to the enemy sistahs and become an object for ciil iyo cadho bax

You got banter cuz.