Have u been 2 Somalia of lately, have u been bothered by

[flyWOODY]

I was thrown off by the awkward staring and the never ending eye balling at first, but then I got use to it, I guess for them staring is not perceived as an act of rudeness, only place where people would not be staring is inside the masjiid, everywhere else they would be eye balling me like I killed their hooyo or abo, the milk ladies and the khat sellers being the worst ones.

Hortaa the xawalado are the worst ones, I remember first time I went to pick up money, my brother added the family nickname to my name and so the clerk asked me "ma hebelki reer hebel baa" and I must of said yes thats my awoowe and some dude standing next to me got excited and said " Waa kee kaas? arman aqaana?" and then he went on telling me that he's entitled to some of the money, I thought he was gonna say that we are related(thats normal, people claiming family bond for some shaaxad money), but the dude wanted money just because he thought he recognized my family.

You kidding right, I'm serious

[Jove]

Borrowed a pen from a staff lady at the Mogadishu airport and she demanded payment afterward. Was staying at a hotel before that and when I began checking out, older man who had been acting like my long lost uncle pulled me aside and recited a tale of misfortune that ended with a plea for $100.

[flyWOODY]

Borrowed a pen from a staff lady at the Mogadishu airport and she demanded payment afterward. Was staying at a hotel before that and when I began checking out, older man who had been acting like my long lost uncle pulled me aside and recited a tale of misfortune that ended with a plea for $100.

Did you hand over the 100

[Jove]

Borrowed a pen from a staff lady at the Mogadishu airport and she demanded payment afterward. Was staying at a hotel before that and when I began checking out, older man who had been acting like my long lost uncle pulled me aside and recited a tale of misfortune that ended with a plea for $100.

Did you hand over the 100

Nah, but I gave him a big wad of Somali shillings since I was leaving the country.

[Julkimi]

People think just because you're from west you're loaded with cash. I remember back in high school when I went to Puntland, my uncle took us to this restaurant and the waiters were shocked that my uncle was paying the meal, he even had the audicity to tell my uncle, why are you paying? Let them pay I know they're loaded with money. My uncle stood up and gave him the I am going to body slam you on this cement if you don't get out of here look.


And randoms guessing your grandfather's name and when they guess it they claim to be related to you, therefore you must pay up smh.

And don't get me started on chicks giving you attitude because they think you will take their men smh

[AgentOfChaos]

I went back home a while back, I remember feeling excited by mere thought of standing at motherland's amazing sunny beach with beautiful blue open sky and basking in the calming ocean breeze, but all that evaporated away when my plane landed in middle of a desolate dry post apocalyptic plain with no trees as far as the eye could see, and in the horizon I saw what appeared to be a horde of hungry wolves moving towards me ready to devour me limb from limb, but as they come closer turns out it wasn't bloodthirsty wolves but rather just my relatives seeking shaxaad.

[Julkimi]

I went back home a while back, I remember feeling excited by mere thought of standing at motherland's amazing sunny beach with beautiful blue open sky and basking in the calming ocean breeze, but all that evaporated away when my plane landed in middle of a desolate dry post apocalyptic plain with no trees as far as the eye could see, and in the horizon I saw what appeared to be a horde of hungry wolves moving towards me ready to devour me limb from limb, but as they come closer turns out it wasn't bloodthirsty wolves but rather just my relatives seeking shaxaad.

Looooooooool. I can't breathe.

[KnowThySelf23]

LOL i really want to go, but your stories are making it seem like a mess. what are some good things you guys experienced there?

[flyWOODY]

I went back home a while back, I remember feeling excited by mere thought of standing at motherland's amazing sunny beach with beautiful blue open sky and basking in the calming ocean breeze, but all that evaporated away when my plane landed in middle of a desolate dry post apocalyptic plain with no trees as far as the eye could see, and in the horizon I saw what appeared to be a horde of hungry wolves moving towards me ready to devour me limb from limb, but as they come closer turns out it wasn't bloodthirsty wolves but rather just my relatives seeking shaxaad.

Loooooool walahi reminds me my first time back home as a grown man..I was elated to be heading home..my family called my uncle to get me through the airport..as soon as entered the airport lobby some dude approached and me thinking this is one of my cousins I hugged him hard bc he called out my name nd surname ..I immediately found out ileen dude was an airport worker ordered my uncle to bring me outside..that's not it..I came outside and a man that looked identical to my father gave me a very. Affectionate hug and it was uncle..then he held my hand and amazingly he lined up 10 cousin dudes to introduce me to one by one, like how they do with the president when he comes back from overseas..one thing I remember the most was how my image of my cousins was forever ruined, I thought all my cousins would be great looking people but they were the ugliest man alive with protruding teeth and a terrible odor.. But guess what.,I come to love them bc they were in their natural state and they were the coolest people ever.,I've made friendship with some of them that I love them to death..one of them is very close to me that I even paid his wedding..I even send him money unexpectedly..I always send money to him .l I can forget the love he showed me when one of my little brother got beat up by kids from the UK and he went to war with me..oh btw I taught him to dress well, I gave my clothes and cologne ..I send him phones whenever someone was heading to the motherland..I opened social media's for him..I took him around my diaspora friends ..I always told him to order anything and I always paid..I even attempted to hook him up with them diaspora chicks around us in hopes of getting him a passport but the language barrier made impossible.

[MujahidAishah]

Meance you just spoke the truth espeacially about the hook ups

PREACH

[BlackRain]

One thing I hate about Africa is lack of public bathrooms. I once did the unthinkable and had a lot of camel milk and went to Eastleigh mall. After like an hour walking around, i felt that sharp pain of talking no 2 and I started scrambling around like a mad man asking random strangers about bathrooms. I ended up shitting on my self and then had to go back to the hotel without talking to nobody.

[KnowThySelf23]

One thing I hate about Africa is lack of public bathrooms. I once did the unthinkable and had a lot of camel milk and went to Eastleigh mall. After like an hour walking around, i felt that sharp pain of talking no 2 and I started scrambling around like a mad man asking random strangers about bathrooms. I ended up shitting on my self and then had to go back to the hotel without talking to nobody.

no public bath rooms anywhere??? wow that sucks

[AbdiJohnson]

1)Excessive staring
2) Picking noses and handling food
3) People coming in 5 in the morning to your house
4) People laughing that you got big shoes (I'm size 10 ffs)
5) The guy who makes the cakes and ice cream at the restaurant "is at home"
6) Rolling blackouts
7) Water coming in jugs from donkey carts
8) White people getting better service than Somalis
9) No personal space is given
10)Cats are kicked instead of shooing them. Animal abuse is rampant

I am,

Abdi "Its a crazy place" Johnson

[TheGrumpyGeeljire]

1)Excessive staring
2) Picking noses and handling food
3) People coming in 5 in the morning to your house
4) People laughing that you got big shoes (I'm size 10 ffs)
5) The guy who makes the cakes and ice cream at the restaurant "is at home"
6) Rolling blackouts
7) Water coming in jugs from donkey carts
8) White people getting better service than Somalis
9) No personal space is given
10)Cats are kicked instead of shooing them. Animal abuse is rampant

I am,

Abdi "Its a crazy place" Johnson

11) Crazy driving on roads filled with potholes.

[EvolSyawla]

loll All these bad stories have their own charm. You learn to live around the short-comings, and appreciate how fRIKIN fun and amazing it is to be home!

I love it here walahi.

Im going to buy a car when I come back from Toronto inshaAllah. I thought I would be scolded, but aabo even said he'll double what I save and get me a little 4x4 to keep me safe if someone wants to browbeat a little girl on the road lol

I have seen more and more ladies driving, it's awesome!