when she makes more money than him...

[precious_dyme]

Marriage life would be much more easier if every men think like Gedo_Boy

[zulaika]

[quote="#1baller"]Zules,

I see things ain't never change. You still enjoy the battle of the sexes.

Anyhow boo..y'all females gotta earn some bread in this world we live in. Contrary to what some of these guys think I think its a good thang for a female to work so I can spend some of her money too.

After all she spends mine, then why can't I spend hers. 8)[/quote]

baller,

true, but what some around here fail to see that is that my spin on the “independent woman” idea is one that actually benefits the faraxs in our lives. If I do this, it is because I want to strengthen our income, to improve the quality of our lives, etc. etc., but I don’t necessarily have to do this…u see our culture and faith is one that permits me to say “what’s mine is mine…and what’s yours is mine” and any farax in short supply of this demand, I can prosecute him to the full extent of the sharia law. cuz he’s supposed to provide for me and not touch a penny of my money.

[Niya]

Zulaika, it will not be an issue if the man is secure. However, if he is a dude who lives for what his friends at the corner coffee shop think of him, then it will be a huge problem.

Some claim that one of the reasons for the high divorce rate in our communities is due to women having access to andcontroling income from welfare. Role reversal has psycholgical effect on some men who have been used to leveraging the only thing going for them i.e. d#*k privelege

[Gedo_Boy]

Niya,

For every man that is irresponsible or insecure, there is a stupid b!tch who is a no-good mother & no-good wife so let's not frame the conversation in terms of absolutes like the women are so great and the men are so irresponsible/insecure.


I have seen a lot especially when I got serious about marriage so don't tell me about useless Faraxs b/c I can bring up a lot of useless Xaliimos.

2 way street dear.

[Gedo_Boy]

[quote="MJ-Pride"]My women making more money than me is an insult to me period. I can't imagine for the life of me sharing a bed with a female that makes more money than me. Her ego will tremendously skyrocket and an aura of invincibility will consume her one-dimensional brain.I recommend the Faraxs in here to run the min you face this situation. [/quote]


There are some mature woman that can handle this situation, but I don't think it would be the majority.

[zulaika]

[quote="Gedo_Boy"]


Do you girls realistically think you have TWICE the capability of men?

I can't ever be mother, be pregnant, take care of children like a mother can. I can help around and make it easier on her but it is entirely UNREALISTIC for her to work like a man and work like only a woman can.

I hope I am never IN NEED of my wife's money.......I would appreciate anything she spent on me though.

IF she makes money, her 1st obligation should be OUR kids.[/quote]


Gedo,

walalo this day and age, wealth building isn’t necessarily confined to the number of hours u put in. sure as a female I’m expected to miss x number of days from the office to attend to my biological callings, having kids, and in some cases severe red weeks. however some of those lost work times are already a gratuitous feature in mine and other successful famale’s employment contract, and with that, we still manage to generate more income than some of our male counterparts. I know current stats claim that men still earn more than women, I am not objecting those stats…but my point in this topic is in reference to the women who still manage to earn more than their male coutnerpats….marka join me in that regard hadaba.

[Niya]

Lol!! Okay Gedo-boy, point well taken even though I suspect there are more men at fault then women.

[zulaika]

[quote="Ina Baxar"]In all of the latest threads I have seen her post , I come 2 realize that Zulaika is sincerly a team oriented person . She's got great leadership skills .[/quote]

Thanks huuno… u sooooo sweet.

lakin I wouldn’t call myself a great leader. I’m only a captian of my own ship. 8)

[Naaima]

Salam alaikum

keep religion and daqan somali outisde but our somali men need to realize that in the modern social and political environment they have no advantage over women...women are being educated to higher degrees, more qualified and being on the same level almost higher.. so from the pritical point of view it would be totally chavanistic if not idiotic for rejecting xaaskaga’s ability to earn more just because the you can't... well whats good for one is good for both and two payslips are better than one..

[Gedo_Boy]

zulaika,

I know what you're saying and I have no qualms with your concerns b/c you are somebody on the verge of marriage and you are employed.......If my wife were to make more money than me, it wouldn't bother me b/c it's her money....... that's like having a rich father in law, you are tied to money but it's money you would rather do without

Like I said, I don't want my wife to be forced to work b/c of circumtances like I don't provide enough money or we want to live a more material lifestyle.

It depends too much on the individual context. If my wife was the only female gynecologist in my Somali community, it would be very stupid for me to ask her to stay at home.......if she's a Customer Service Representative that's another story.

If we are not surviving, yes she would have to help out....but if we just want to live a more materialistic life & get a Mercedes instead of a Honda then I think a mother/wife is a more noble profession.

[Ina Baxar]

Zulaika , I 've never said you're a" great leader" but you have great leadership skills , in my opinion , having leadership skills= being a uniter .

[zulaika]

[quote="Ina Baxar"]Zulaika , I 've never said you're a" great leader" but you have great leadership skills , in my opinion , having leadership skills= being a uniter . Sheekadu rag iyo dumar baa loo kala baxoo , had iyo jeer dhinac uun ba loo bata ee [/quote]

baxar,

true u never said I was a great leader, u said great leadership skills…call me crazy but I often equate the 2.

anyways, waryaa stop acting like a typical farax, giving compliments and then askig back 50% of it. ka bax badahaas baan ku idhi.

[HELWAA]

cajiib.

[zulaika]

Cajiib indeed....helwaa confined to one word. naa warka soo daa, I know u itchin’ to say some’

[Gedo_Boy]

zulaika,

Sometimes it seems to me like the girls get riled up in all this not because it's a likely scenario, but because there is this competition against men. Also, they are just infatuated with the 'Miss Independent' ultra modern lifestyle that ironically leads to growing numbers of depressed and emotionally stressed women.

However, at the end of the day even if the women is working and it's stressful, she can always throw in the towel and say: "I want to stop working for a few years." ....Men can NEVER have that luxury. They can't quit providing b/c "they want a break"

TECHNICALLY, if the man can meet the needs the wife has to ask permission from her husband to work. If my wife was considering work I would have to consider what kind of job it is. Is she working just to become a receptionist?

I already said before that I would encourage my wife to pursue her education with all of my resources. Does that sound like I'm insecure of what she might accomplish?

As a matter of fact, if I put her through school or graduate school and she developed skills that landed a really professional, rewarding, challenging position in a career she likes.......do you think I wouldn't be walking around w/ a smile like: "Man I really built her from the ground up"