misconception of boyfriend/girlfriend in our community

[Nomand]

there is no such thing as boyfriend/ girlfriend in somali culture. we have something called hit and run.

[KingMJ]

Good topic that brings up a good point:

Is it better for a Hijabi that dates and has a boyfriend to take off her hijab on dates? Or to date in public where everyone can see a hijabi dating/having a boyfriend?

TBH I think its probably better if a hijabi dates in private as once a female wears hijab she represents all muslimahs...

What do you think?

Date in private? Better? What?

If a chick is bar-hopping and going home with a guy at the end of a night, then yeah, maybe a hijab wouldn't be best. How about a guy? Is he free to date as he wishes? Free to go to bars and clubs?

But that isn't what the discussion should be. What should be asked is what "halaal dating" entails, and if it's even possible.

I was just asking whether she should wear hijab or not. Imagine if in a few years we see hijabis in every cinema, restaurant and venue with a boyfriend in tow thats not a good look..

[Alphanumeric]

The question should be whether not going to a restaurant with someone of the opposite gender is haram. If we're shunning them into privacy, we're only guaranteeing something haraam. Whether or not it's a "good look" shouldn't even be in the discussion.

[VeiledGarbasar]

i talked about this before...and i bring up the subject again only to re-address this constant misconception about "dating" and claiming to have boyfriends/girlfriends in our community....specially when girls in full hijab claim to have boyfriends and in a "committed relationship"...what does that mean?

unless you've gone past first base...you don't have a boyfriend...so these hajabis need to stop loosely throwing around these terms as if it applies to their situation...and if so...please stop wearing the hijab.

there's a difference between talking to someone for marriage prospects and "dating" someone.

my advice for the day!!

I agree with your advice for the day yarta!

I think people are scared of being 'single' when all those around them are not. We tend to have sheep mentality.

[hipsterrunoff]

Isn't zina third base, and or am I getting my bases mixed up?

1st base- kissing
2nd base- touching/fondling
3rd base- actual intercourse ie: home run

[hipsterrunoff]

so answer your question...yes its better not to wear the hijab if one is leading a lifestyle which defeats its very purpose...why bother??

You saying this is a sin in itself. Live and let live. And, please leave the rest up to Allah!

[TeAmo]

Nowadays even hoyos r dating I went to movies Friday nite n some hoyo 40+ wit her boyfriend another old abo wtf!! I new dat lady divorce her husband about 3 months ago now she's dating likes she's 25 wtf!!!

Astaqforolah she was 40 something . Maybe they were getting to know each other Somalis do get to know each other before marriage you know. It's not in their culture to just marry before knowing the person, my parents encourage me to know/talk to the person for atleast a year before marrying them.

[DayaxJeclee]

yaah yaah, see qof u baranee haddii uu la kulmin. wax furiinka u batay waaye. labo qof oo aqoon dheer is ku leheen is guursanaayo. af garasho la'aan u danbeyso iyo furniin.

[Colonel]

there is no such thing as boyfriend/ girlfriend in somali culture. we have something called hit and run.

come to think of it I haven't seen many cases of Somali bf/gf
perhaps I just keep good company

[AhlulbaytSoldier]

Some people pretend as if hijabis are robots deprived from sexual needs.
Lets not kid ourselves.

[FarhanYare]

Nowadays even hoyos r dating I went to movies Friday nite n some hoyo 40+ wit her boyfriend another old abo wtf!! I new dat lady divorce her husband about 3 months ago now she's dating likes she's 25 wtf!!!

its doesn't surprise me at all reer canada are on their own league

[FarhanYare]

i agree with zulaika 100% hijabi's that are dating/sinning are mockering the religion and i dont see why they should pretend they are religious just to make their family happy at all, when they've neglected their own creater's commands.

[Keyblade]

Isn't zina third base, and or am I getting my bases mixed up?

1st base- kissing
2nd base- touching/fondling
3rd base- actual intercourse ie: home run

See, I knew I had my sexual bases down pat. Alpha's on some baseball ish .

[salool]

I have come to a point in my life that i dont give a damn about other people's livs walle.Amba ha sineystan amba ha is qaawiyan, qof kasta noloshiisa aya la raacshey ee taada uun ka adkow.Nin kasta xisaab ba ka danbeysa aduunkan lagu waari maayo.

[miskeen86]

Isn't zina third base, and or am I getting my bases mixed up?

1st base- kissing
2nd base- touching/fondling
3rd base- actual intercourse ie: home run

-1 base - chatting via IM or texting on cellphone
0 base - talking on phne
1st base- kissing
2nd base- touching/fondling
3rd base- actual intercourse ie: home run
4th base - girl gets pregnant
5the base - girls delivers bastard kid