InaSamaale wrote:Lamagoodle wrote:Yes, it does. You cannot imagine the number of poems composed on love bugs, longings, lust and much more. SOmali love is expressed differently- subtle; idioms, metaphorical ...
As the love Guri of these boards, I have written on the subject; check some of my posts.
Fair point Lam, about being expressed differently (for instance public displays of affection isn't our thing)
I always thought that was the case, but when y
ou see a wife running after 6 + kids on her own, cooking/cleaning, being responsible for all aspects of their life and the husband not having the compassion to help her, how can that be a home built on love?
Maybe, the older generation were good at the initial wooing of women, the few Somali songs I know only glamourise the infatuation stage of a relationship and never anything deeper.
Inasamaale,
That we somalis men are bad at helping our wives should be seen in the light of "learning" and the historical context. We are creatures of our history. BTW; in most of the cases, the somali woman knows that history dictates our gender roles. They view household activities as a monopoly. Even if the somali tries his best to clean, cook and do other activities, the wife will always think that these activities lie within her domain.
We share this with a large majority of other societies.
I don't think the above has anything to do with love by the way.
Back in Somalia, the man was the provider. Paid work for Women came to large towns in the 1970s . Even here the somali wife had a herd of female family members and maids to help them. Most of the older generation of somalis were born (or their parents were born) in rural areas.
As we get urbanised, as we build diasporas in the west, our institutions are redefined, challenged and questions. But we are still creatures of our history and it will take generations to change this. I would argue that many women do not want a revolution to happen in this area.
Maybe, the older generation were good at the initial wooing of women, the few Somali songs I know only glamourise the infatuation stage of a relationship and never anything deeper.
Isn't this a global phenomenon?
I have some difficulties in how "love" is defined here - the tone at least-. It seems that some members equate "love" with public display of affection. Love is a feeling and expressing it could take several dimensions. You do not need to hold hands in public nor do you need to kiss/hug in public. Love is good when it is expressed internally.
And more importantly, is there a global yardstick to measure love? I don't think so.
Somali songs are filled with lyrics on love. Most of these are on the theme of lust/longing, a precursor to love. Yes, the focus is on the journey.. Kadib waa sheeko kale