Sisters, Islam Has Honored Us !

[Enlightened~Sista]

surrender that hadeeth seems to contradict the spirit of Islam. Prophet Muhammed peace be upon him exhorted us to pay visits to the sick.

[*Nobleman*]

ES the husband has the right to refuse he's wife from visiting her ill parents. there was hadith about i dont remember which one but it was sahiihi. a women who's father was ill asked her husband if she can visit him, he said no- he has got a reason, you just dont say no to someone for no reason. he said the house, the children and i need you. she stayed, the next day she was told her father is seriously ill and might die, she asked him again he said the same thing-no the third day she was told her fater passed away and is been burried today she asked him if she can visit him and finally he said yes. she went and as she visted the grave she cried, her tears reached he's grave of her father and prophet muhammed who was told (via waxyi) that that lady's father is ehlul jannah, when the ashaba who he (prophet scw) was telling story asked why he (the father) was ehlul janah? prophet muhammed scw said becuase he's daugther was so patient with her husbad tho she wanted to see him at he's death bed but she didnt break her husbands' orders, and for that reason, ilaahy asaguu unaxariistay. ilaahay waa qafuuru rahiim.

so yes husbands do have the right to say you canot visit so and so even you ill parents, providing they have reason,, so please stop arguing for the sake of it. diinta soo baro, ama iska aamus just like many snetters here.

ps: is for your own good to learn the corect sunnah before you marry, because is the only law that can unite you and your hubby, when he's doing something wrong you can say to him, xabiibti itaqilaah, didnt the prophet scw say so and so. believe me he will be great shock and have hell lot of respect for you, than if you say, so what, i can do whatever i want, i can go whatever i want, i can wear whatever i want.

Surrender and lil cutie for actually explaining this issue and citing hadith.

ES- You love to argue for the sake of arguing, They have bought proof, now its your duty to debate based on this proof

[Enlightened~Sista]

Nobleman am I not debating this based on this ''proof'' ? What do you want me to do?

[*Nobleman*]

Nobleman am I not debating this based on this ''proof'' ? What do you want me to do?

No but your arguing just for the sake of arguing. You refuted what they said, they bought proof, now refute their proof or question the authenticity of their proof. But your response comes across as if your arguing based on your beliefs.

[Enlightened~Sista]

Nobleman am I not debating this based on this ''proof'' ? What do you want me to do?

No but your arguing just for the sake of arguing. You refuted what they said, they bought proof, now refute their proof or question the authenticity of their proof. But your response comes across as if your arguing based on your beliefs.

I did & I'm doing just that, based upon the teachings of Islam namely

1) Importance of Silat Ar Raxam, maintaining the ties of kinship.


"And We have enjoined on man (to be good) to his parents. In travail upon travail did his mother bear him, and in two years was his weaning. Show gratitude to Me and to thy parents; to Me is thy final goal." (Chapter31: verse14)

According to the above verse, gratitude to God and to parents go hand in hand. Gratitude to God is incomplete without showing gratitude to one's parents. Since being grateful to God is a form of ibadah (worship) which earns heavenly rewards, it can therefore be said that being grateful to one's parents also earns heavenly rewards.http://www.islamfortoday.com/akhtar01.htm

"Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none but Him, and that ye be kind to parents. Whether one or more attain old age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honor. And out of kindness, lower to them the wing of humility, and say, "my Lord! bestow on them Thy Mercy, even as they cherished me in childhood." (Quran 17: 23,24)

Countless authentic ahadeeth about the importance of joining the ties of kinship.

"Worship Almighty and do not associate anybody with Him: establish Prayer; pay Zakat and join the ties of kinship." -(Bukhari and Muslim)

"He who just returns the visits of his relatives does not completely fulfill the obligation of relationship. But he who ignores the mistakes of his relatives, forgives them, and visits them in order to bind the ties of relationship when they are broken does fulfill the obligations of relationship.' -(Bukhari)



2) Virtues of Visiting sick people


“The rights of one Muslim over another Muslim are six… When you meet him, you greet him with the salaam (i.e. to say: “As-Salamu alaykum”), when he invites you, you accept his invitation, when he consults you in a matter, you give him sincere advice, when he sneezes and praises God, you ask God to have mercy on him, when he is sick, you visit him, and when he passes away you accompany him (through his funeral).


“A visitor walking to visit a sick person will be wading in the mercy of God. When the visitor sits with the sick one, they will be immersed in mercy until his or her return.”


“On the Day of Resurrection, God the Mighty and Majestic will say: ‘O child of Adam! I became sick and you did not visit me!’ The person will say, ‘O Lord, how can I visit you and you are the Lord of all that Exists!’ God will say, ‘Did you not know that my slave ‘so and so’ became sick, and you did not visit him? Did you not know that if you visited him, you would have found me with him?’” (Saheeh Muslim)





As if those teachings werent clear, we have Scholars who come and say stuff like this,

The husband has the right to prevent her from going out of his house for something that she has to do, whether she wants to go and see her parents, or visit them when they are sick, or attend the funeral of one of them. Ibn Qudaamah

[abdalla11]

Enlightened Sista, were are not 'debating' silatul arraxim, but the obeydience of the wife to her husband.


Question:
how important is a husband to his wife, are her sisters more important than husband, who should she listen to, how up on the importance ladder does husband comes. is husband more important than her own parents and sisters.

Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.

The Qur’aan and Sunnah indicate that the husband has a confirmed right over his wife, and that she is commanded to obey him, treat him well and put obedience to him above obedience to her parents and brothers. Indeed, he is her paradise and her hell. For example, Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allaah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means”

[al-Nisa’ 4:34]

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “It is not permissible for a woman to fast when her husband is present except with his permission, or to allow anyone in his house without his permission.”

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 4899.

Al-Albaani (may Allaah have mercy on him) said, commenting on this hadeeth: Since it is obligatory for a woman to obey her husband with regard to his satisfying his desire, it is more appropriate that it be obligatory for her to obey him in that which is more important than that, namely raising their children, guiding the family, and other rights and duties.

From Adaab al-Zafaaf, p. 282

Ibn Hibbaan narrated that Abu Hurayrah said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If a woman prays her five (daily prayers), fasts her month (Ramadaan), guards her chastity and obeys her husband, it will be said to her: ‘Enter Paradise from whichever of the gates of Paradise you wish.’” Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, no. 660.

Ibn Maajah (1853) narrated that ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Abi Awfa said: When Mu’aadh came from Syria, he prostrated to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) who said, “What is this, O Mu'aadh?” He said, I went to Syria and saw them prostrating to their archbishops and patriarchs, and I wanted to do that for you. The Messenger of Allaah (S) said, “Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allaah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman can fulfil her duty towards Allaah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.”

Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Ibn Maajah.

Ahmad (19025) and al-Haakim narrated from al-Husayn ibn Muhsin that his paternal aunt came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) for something and he dealt with her need, then the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Do you have a husband?” She said, “Yes.” He said: “How are you with him?” She said, “I do not neglect any of his rights except those I am unable to fulfil.” He said: “Look at how you are with him, for he is your paradise and your hell” – i.e., he is the cause of you entering Paradise if you fulfil his rights and the cause of your entering Hell if you fall short in that.

Al-Mundhiri classed the isnaad of this hadeeth as jayyid in al-Targheeb wa’l-Tarheeb; it was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb wa’l-Tarheeb, no. 1933.

If there is a conflict between obedience to one’s husband and obedience to one’s parents, then obedience to one’s husband takes priority. Imam Ahmad (may Allaah have mercy on him) said concerning a woman who has a husband and a sick mother: Obeying her husband is more obligatory upon her than (taking care of) her mother, unless he gives her permission. (Sharh Muntaha al-Iraadaat, 3/47).

In al-Insaaf (8/362) it says: She does not have to obey her parents with regard to leaving her husband or visiting etc., rather obedience to the husband takes priority.

There is a hadeeth concerning this issue which was narrated by al-Haakim from ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) who said: I asked the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), “Who has the most right over a woman?” He said: “Her husband.” I said, “Who has the most right over a man?” He said, “His mother.”

But this is a weak (da’eef) hadeeth, which was classed as such by al-Albaani in Da’eef al-Targheeb wa’l-Tarheeb, 1212, and he criticized al-Mundhiri for classing it as hasan.

And Allaah knows best.

www.islamqa.com

[HELWAA]

be sure to get married to a good guy who has a good heart and will allow you to see your family anytime you wish.

Right there ladies, dont marry an asswhole who u cant get along with, You have that choice to begin with, besides what kind of a retard will not let u see ur love ones when they're sick?

Waaba xaywaan ka naagta reerkooda oo diida.

[Ka darag]

In college like yday..i was walking behind 2 dudes and they were talking about girls who wear abaayas...they were like i feel sorry for them .....walahi these ppl r so confused whats to feel sorry for?? they chose to wear it wtf

[Paddington Bear]

The title makes it sound like an evangelical sermon. Oh, it's a QA topic...carry on.

[Ni Hao]

[Lil_Cutie..]

Enlightened Sista, were are not 'debating' silatul arraxim, but the obeydience of the wife to her husband.


Question:
how important is a husband to his wife, are her sisters more important than husband, who should she listen to, how up on the importance ladder does husband comes. is husband more important than her own parents and sisters.

Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.

The Qur’aan and Sunnah indicate that the husband has a confirmed right over his wife, and that she is commanded to obey him, treat him well and put obedience to him above obedience to her parents and brothers. Indeed, he is her paradise and her hell. For example, Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allaah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means”

[al-Nisa’ 4:34]

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “It is not permissible for a woman to fast when her husband is present except with his permission, or to allow anyone in his house without his permission.”

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 4899.

Al-Albaani (may Allaah have mercy on him) said, commenting on this hadeeth: Since it is obligatory for a woman to obey her husband with regard to his satisfying his desire, it is more appropriate that it be obligatory for her to obey him in that which is more important than that, namely raising their children, guiding the family, and other rights and duties.

From Adaab al-Zafaaf, p. 282

Ibn Hibbaan narrated that Abu Hurayrah said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If a woman prays her five (daily prayers), fasts her month (Ramadaan), guards her chastity and obeys her husband, it will be said to her: ‘Enter Paradise from whichever of the gates of Paradise you wish.’” Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, no. 660.

Ibn Maajah (1853) narrated that ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Abi Awfa said: When Mu’aadh came from Syria, he prostrated to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) who said, “What is this, O Mu'aadh?” He said, I went to Syria and saw them prostrating to their archbishops and patriarchs, and I wanted to do that for you. The Messenger of Allaah (S) said, “Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allaah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman can fulfil her duty towards Allaah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.”

Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Ibn Maajah.

Ahmad (19025) and al-Haakim narrated from al-Husayn ibn Muhsin that his paternal aunt came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) for something and he dealt with her need, then the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Do you have a husband?” She said, “Yes.” He said: “How are you with him?” She said, “I do not neglect any of his rights except those I am unable to fulfil.” He said: “Look at how you are with him, for he is your paradise and your hell” – i.e., he is the cause of you entering Paradise if you fulfil his rights and the cause of your entering Hell if you fall short in that.

Al-Mundhiri classed the isnaad of this hadeeth as jayyid in al-Targheeb wa’l-Tarheeb; it was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb wa’l-Tarheeb, no. 1933.

If there is a conflict between obedience to one’s husband and obedience to one’s parents, then obedience to one’s husband takes priority. Imam Ahmad (may Allaah have mercy on him) said concerning a woman who has a husband and a sick mother: Obeying her husband is more obligatory upon her than (taking care of) her mother, unless he gives her permission. (Sharh Muntaha al-Iraadaat, 3/47).

In al-Insaaf (8/362) it says: She does not have to obey her parents with regard to leaving her husband or visiting etc., rather obedience to the husband takes priority.

There is a hadeeth concerning this issue which was narrated by al-Haakim from ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) who said: I asked the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), “Who has the most right over a woman?” He said: “Her husband.” I said, “Who has the most right over a man?” He said, “His mother.”

But this is a weak (da’eef) hadeeth, which was classed as such by al-Albaani in Da’eef al-Targheeb wa’l-Tarheeb, 1212, and he criticized al-Mundhiri for classing it as hasan.

And Allaah knows best.

http://www.islamqa.com

[Crazy Cat Lady]

This whole thread makes me wanna throw up a la Linda Blair in The Exorcist.

[Lil_Cutie..]

Erm...Why?

[Crazy Cat Lady]

When women are viewed as chattel, I start to feel a little queasy

[Enlightened~Sista]

Crazy Cat Lady lol


It's not only men who look at women as chattel many women see themselves and talk about themselves that way too.