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Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Thu Apr 04, 2013 9:25 pm
by metamorphosis
waa dad wada xanuunsanaya wallahay! A person who cheats doesnt deserve a second chance period!
Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Fri Apr 05, 2013 1:48 am
by Negritude
salool wrote:What the hell is emotional affair?
if sex is not involved that cant be considered as cheating.
Of course you wouldn't consider anything non-physical to be cheating. You don't think with your head, salool.
Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Fri Apr 05, 2013 4:38 am
by salool
^^Do i know you horta?
Why are you adressing me like you know everything about me?
Whoever end his marriage over a few phone calls and messages is an idiot! There are women who run after married men who try everything to destroy their marriages, that actually happend to a friend of mine.This woman even made up stories how she was having lunches with my friend husband, sending emails and shit and made up lies.
People should be 100% sure before they accuse their husbands and wives for cheating.As for that site fah posted, it's ful of gaalos with no moral, cheating is like drinking coffe for them and we should't compare them with muslims.
Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Fri Apr 05, 2013 7:59 am
by Negritude
Is that not what you did, in a more extreme form, with this comment "Cheating is like drinking coffee for them and we shouldn't compare them with Muslims"? Irony is a bitch that did not bother to explain himself to your presumptuous, patronizing ass.
Now, let me really get into it.
Posts ago you stated this:
salool wrote:What the hell is emotional affair?
if sex is not involved that cant be considered as cheating.
Now you're singing this tune?
salool wrote:^^Do i know you horta?
Why are you adressing me like you know everything about me?
Whoever end his marriage over a few phone calls and messages is an idiot! There are women who
run after married men who try everything to
destroy their marriages, that actually happend to a friend of mine.This woman even made up
stories how she was having lunches with my friend husband, sending emails and shit and made up lies.
People should be 100% sure before they accuse their husbands and wives for cheating.As for that site fah posted, it's ful of gaalos with no moral, cheating is like drinking coffe for them and we should't compare them with muslims.
All the examples you used as to how a marriage could've been destroyed were not physical and did not involve sex. While 'having lunches, sending emails and shit' are not dependent on sex or sexual attraction, if there is emotional chemistry between the people involved it would be considered emotional cheating. Something you denied the possibility of and threw a hissy fit at my highlighting of it. Your outrage and condemning tone confirms that you acknowledge it too, if on a subconscious (and more rational) level.
Regarding all your egotistical, rhetorical questions trying to make me out to be insignificant: This is the internet, honey. When you post something, you put it up for reading, response and reaction. Whether you like it or not.
From the posts of yours I have skimmed, you seem unhealthily focused on sex. You have been bringing it up in irrelevant contexts such as urging men who make threads expressing stress or anxiety to fuck teenage girls in third world countries as a form of relief, or randomly saying everything comes down to the size of a man's penis. These are just examples from the top of my head that have informed the view that you think with your genitalia, and not your brain. I'm just saying.
Your scatterbrained posts in this thread alone confirm this.
Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Fri Apr 05, 2013 8:25 am
by waryaa
lol - I ended up reading two very, i mean real long threads last nite and went to bed laughing... To make it shorter, I read posts from topic starters and skipped the rest...
Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Fri Apr 05, 2013 8:30 am
by InaSamaale
I do not get what is funny about other people's misery.
Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Fri Apr 05, 2013 9:37 am
by FAH1223
Lillaahiya wrote:I caught my wife searching some guy on the internet one month or so before we were married.
I personally spent 25k on the wedding. Now understand very clear. when I say I personally, I mean ME.. Not her.. Not her family.. ME.. I saved 25k for our wedding.
She cried and I sucked it up at that time I thought WTF am I going to do. I made myself believe she never met him.
About 2 years later after our first son was 1 years old. I caught her trying to hook up with the I.T. guy from the brotherhood of sisters of saint joseph of boston. He was basically gonna fly in and fvck her in a motel room 1 week before our wedding anniversary. I even found the cloths she was going to wear to meet him.
We did some crappy counseling and just rug swept it.
About 7 years ago I caught her emailing her old boyfriend that she went out with before me. Longstory short he was a drug addict that is now a drug counselor in Florida.
So I guess I have been lucky that I caught her having or trying to have 3 Emotional Affairs but nothing physical.
This time I snapped. We went to a very good therapist / MC. As a friend said to me, He felt we came out of that episode much stronger. I felt it too. We connected much better after that.
Fast forward to Sept 25, 2012. I caught my wife having an Affair both EA and PA. She lied about trying to work it out.
BTW we have 2 kids now. 13 and 8.
On Dec 30, 2012 I caught her buying the Other man a Xmas present. I had to grill her though to get her to confess. Nothing ever came straight out.
Today we are almost done with the divorce.
19 years ( 5 years dating, 3 years before engagement, 2 years of putting her through college and paying for it. 14 years of marriage ) down the fvcking tubes except for 2 great kids. If anything this divorce had made me closer with my kids. Go figure.
http://talkaboutmarriage.com/coping-inf ... ouses.html
This site is horrible. Horrible.
he threw her to the bushes
Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Sun Apr 07, 2013 11:57 pm
by FAH1223
I'm a 26 year single male and this forum kind of cements my choice to not get married. There is over a 50% chance your relationship will end in divorce and a somewhat recent study showed that in college educated couples the woman will file for divorce 90% of the time. Yes, 90%. My close friend married his college sweetheart two years ago. Great career (CPA), smart, funny, and just an overall good guy. Long story short she got bored playing house and decided to go out to clubs with her single friends and hook-up with random men. On top of that I just witnessed my best friend's parents go through a divorce not too long ago. They were my next door neighbors growing up and were basically my second set of parents through grade school and college. I've never seen a better couple in my life. Well not too long ago his mother started hanging around her divorced friends. After a few years she decided married life wasn't for her anymore. Now she is going out, getting hammered drunk (she rarely drank prior to this), and hooking up with men my age. All on his father's dime. He's absolutely devastated. It scares the **** out of me someone can change like that. She even admits his father didn't do anything wrong but that she didn't want to waste what "youth" she had left (she's late 40s/early 50s). Wtf. Why are there so many shameless ****s out there now? Is this a phenomenon in the Western world? I've dated around plenty and have had a few long-term relationships. I just don't think I'll ever take the plunge.
http://talkaboutmarriage.com/coping-inf ... rried.html
Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 3:38 am
by qoraxeey
Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 12:03 pm
by BlackVelvet
It was funny at first (Mr. chicken legs
) but after a while calool xanuun waaye.
Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 12:17 pm
by grandpakhalif
FAH perhaps it shows that marriage is incompatible with western hedonistic lifestyle. Marriage is a pure institution, don't blame marriage, blame the West.
Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 12:31 pm
by BlackVelvet
grandpakhalif wrote:FAH perhaps it shows that marriage is incompatible with western hedonistic lifestyle. Marriage is a pure institution, don't blame marriage, blame the West.
Only westerners cheat? Tell that to all the Somali women who have no idea their husband has a "halal" bit on the side
Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 12:40 pm
by grandpakhalif
I don't consider that infidelity. There's no legal precedence in Islam for a husband to tell his 1st wife about his other wives. The only way this can be done is to record a clause in the initial Nikaax agreement that restricts the husband to his 1st wife. Other than that, it is not cheating at all since it is sanctioned by God.
Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 12:46 pm
by BlackVelvet
lol typical Somali man. Talk to your local sheikh (the non Somali one) and see what he says.
Re: This topic will end any thoughts of marriage on this for
Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 12:58 pm
by Hyperactive
cheating nothing to do with nationality, some times is environmental. while in conservative men most cheat or where allowed a second wife. but seems in the west both are equal cause less stricken for women to cheat as men do.
