The kiss that blew it

[CasualFarah]

very good read

cant wait for part 4.


make sticky, it will attract more readers that way.

[Tuushi]

Great read.

Cant wait to read the 3rd part later today.

[Lamagoodle]

Part IV; Sabeen and Xaal


Coincidently, both the in-laws took the same decision; to engage in conflict resolution using what is decreed by the Xeer. Any other thing will be absurd since all the parties know the mechanisms of conflict resolutions.

The problems will be sorted out and a solution would be reached.

Inventions are considered dangerous to this legal process which has its own methodology.

The procedure for these kinds of issues is simple and ubiquitous ; The sabeen giving/taking events and the xaal bixin contrivances have been put in place many centuries ago and everyone knows them.

At daybreak, the two families will get in touch to sort things out: the women have a primary role to play in preparing for the events. Through them impending visits will be known so that families are not caught off guard.

The family of the wife will be hosting the “sabeen xer” meeting because they are officially the wronged. They will prepare the gogol , make and serve tea.

The family of the husband will bring the sabeen (consisting of words of apology, a few kilos of sugar and tea; and some symbolic amount of money. They are the guilty lot.

The wife’s family will accept the sabeen as the first move. It is required by tradition. Refusing sabeen is a crime punishable by banishment from all social activities.

After the “sabeen” is accepted ,there two ways of proceeding;

1.If the issue is a minor one, the “sabeen” carrying group will accept responsibility and the whole issue is solved by afar faataxo.

2.If the issue is a serious one, then a new assembly, the gar qaad assembly is needed. This assembly will give the warring parties an opportunity to express themselves.

An independent group of elders will give the final verdict.

The verdict rendered by the “garqaad” assembly cannot be appealed against.

A unanimous decision and abiding decision is always taken.

In most cases, the verdict will involve some form of retributions which eventually will be reduced by the “victims(s)” as a gesture of goodwill.

A mini—xeer in other words.

Geele prepared for the Sabeen ceremony. He asked one of his sons’s to call two male family relatives

The three men went to the house of Mumin where they found three men from the bride’s family sitting under a qurac tree.
Greetings, jokes and laughter were exchanged.

Tea was served by the womenfolk of the reer Muumin.

Maleele’s uncle starts the conversation with the following carefully chosen word;; we are here to thank you for giving us the bride and to apologise for the tension caused by our son, Maleele while handing the kilos of sugar, tea and a few shillings.

Meymuna’s uncle praises the traditional pedigree of the sabeen and says “horta sabeenta waa idinka qaaday, laakin xaalku intaasi wuu ka weynahay!”

Normally, Uncle Makaraan was a man of few words. He was the quite guy who does not raise his voice. But, this time Geele and company knew that something was brewing.

The issue is not a simple one.

According to tradition, to avoid people speaking in tongues, the speaker directs his speech to only person, whose task is to say “haye” (sometimes repeats what the speaker is saying to convince the speaker that he is being listened to).

Haye, said uncle Jimcaale. Oo maxaa dhacay?

The issue is a serious one! Retorted Makaraan. It is bigger than the normal gabar soo carootey phenomenon!

“We gave you a young fine, well brought up muslim lass, but you gave us an irdaal” he said with seriousness in his voice .
Maleele’s relatives were caught off guard. They never predicted this. To them, after the sabeen everything will be sorted out and the bride will go back to her home.

By now, they knew something had terribly gone wrong the previous night. That their son Maleele was a shadow of what they thought he was. He was probably living as a gaal.

What they did not know was that Caraweelo was at work. She had informed a few women of her encounter with Maleele. She salted what Maleele told her.

Caraweelo had also talked to Meymuna. Being a baleful person, she claimed that Maleele had told her everything. “Naayaa, ileen gabar xun baad ahayd! “ she screamed so that all the neighbours could hear.

“Maya habaryare! “Shouted Meymuna, aware that her reputation and that of the whole family and toll were at stake.
Caraweelo knew by now that she achieved her goal; that her tabloid had some material. She had cornered Meymuna into telling her what transpired the night before.

“oo hadaba ma been buu ii sheegay?” asked Caraweelo unflappably

“Habaryareey, calafkeeyga wuu xumaaday, nin gaal ayaa laigu daray” answered Meymuna with a bothered voice .
“Ragga lama aamino beryahaan” said with a distinct reassuring voice.

She pulled Meymuna aside and asked her for more details- more material for the village talkback radio.

For the first time, Meymuna had someone to confer to.

She recounted the events of the previous night. Caraweelo- the mother of all xan- was reassuring her by uttering words such as “ saqajaan” “nijis” “gaal gaal dhalay” “ bismilaahi” “inaalilaahi” “ subxaanalahi” etc

When she got the information she wanted, Caraweelo immediately went to the hoori of Meymuna’s mother ; “Naa Cambarooy, masiibadaan reerka heshay maxaay ahayd?” she asked.

Mamma Cambaro knew that this devious woman knew everything. Camouflaging what surfaced will prove to be futile . Her son in-law was a gaal in this muslim village. Her daughter had the misfortune of marrying a gaal, gaal dhalay.

Ceebey tacaal!

She informed Mumin..

So, there was a need for a fadhi after the sabeen.

“arrintu waa arrin sabeen ka weyn” said Uncle Makaraan, who, by now was the family spokesman. “Nin gaal ah ayaan islaan noogu dhigteen” he added .

Uncle Jimcaale and the sabeen bringing relatives were taken aback. The issue was a serious one. There should be some kind of damage limitation. There should be a “xaal” qaadasho event.

This is a matter of urgency that should be addressed as soon as possible. It should involve independent actors. The sabeen giving and taking affair does not usually involve other actors than the immediate family members of those involved. The “xaal” “gogol dhig” does. Usually, the members of the jury involve the senior elders and religious leaders. The two tolls will also be represented.

“Waa hagaag! Annu isu imaanyo caawa salaada maqrab kadib” said Uncle Jimcaale with a guilty voice; sheikh Macow, macalin Jaamac, Guleed, Aweys iyo odoyaal kale ayaan u yeereeynaa” he added.

“ Faataxada noo mara” said Makaraan and after a few minutes, the guests left.

After the Maqrib prayers, the Mumin family was invaded by the who is who of the village. If you had grey hair, you were there. If you had passed Juz Cama, you were there.

Mumin and Geele were there as observers and hence were not to utter a word. The two uncles were the lawyers for the respective families.

Greetings, jokes and short anecdotes were exchanged to kickstart the Xaal event. Faataxo was recited and duco was said.
Before the xaal-event, a new sabeen which signify guilt is given.

“ Walalaayaal, inta aanan arrinta u guda galin, bal sabeentaan naga guddooma” said Makaraan humbly while laying some money, some kilos of sugar etc on the dirin.

Spontaneously, Jimcaale and Meymuna’s other relatives, replied “waan idinka qaadanay”.

Any other answer would have been against the xeer.

Sabeens are taken. It is decreed by the xeer. So is Xaal. Rejecting them is breaking the rule of social cohesion and conflict resolutions.

“Faataxada noo mara” busted Sheikh Macow, who by now had assumed the role of the chairperson.

“Bal wax jira noo sheega?” he decreed after wrapping off the faataxa.

“bismilaahi raxmaani raxiimi, waa nala xumeeyey. Soomaaliddu waxaay ku maahmaahda “ sidaan kuugu lisay iiguma aadaan
hambeeynin”. Reer Geele gabar ayaan sharaf ku siinay. Hase yeeshe waxaay na siyeen wiil gaaloobay” said uncle Jimcaale.

Bismilaahi raxmaan raxiim, inaa lilaahi wa inaa ileehi raajicuun could be heard from the gogol.

“walaalayaal, horta xaal qaata” waa la idin xumeeyey replied uncle Makaraan in a voice that was filled with guilt.

“ wiilkeena Maleele, waa nin islaan ah” said Makaraan adding that he is xaafidul quraan to assure the audience that he was a true muslim.

“wixii dhacayna waxaa sabab u ahaa is af garansha waa”.

“ dhallinta manta waxaay sameeyaan waxyaabo la yaab lah” and added “bal fiiri siin (telephone) ayaay wada wataan.

The conversation continued late into the night; jokes about how the dhaqan is changing were exchanged.
How the reer magaal’s are embracing weird cultures.

It was time for Sheikh Macow in his capacity as the chairperson to decree; Bal faataxada noo mara. Sala calaa nabi”
After the faataxo Sheikh Macoow continued; “walaalayaal, gari laba nin kama wada qosliso. Wixii dhacay waa dhaceen; Maleele ma aha nin gala ah. Misaajidka kama maqnaado. Maalin dhoweyd dirimo cusub ayuu misaajidka keenay”.

Sheeydhaan ayaa maray.

Meymuna waa gabar suubaan oo ayada iyo dadkii soo koriyeyba wax qalad ma aaysan sameeynin.

Gabartu waa inaay gurigeeda ku noqoto oo aay dhaqato. Maleelena waa in quraan la saaro. Todoba marro waa in la saaraa.
“ waa siduu sheikh sheegay; Maleele waxaa qaaday sheeydhaan. Waxaan saareeynaa quraan. Xaalna waan bixineeynaa” said Makaraan putting his hand into his shirt pocket and taking out some money.

Admitting guilt even if one feels he/she is innocent is a virtue. It kills all hearsays. It puts an end to a confrontation. It contributes to conflict resolutions.

The xaal was put on the dirin. Sheikh Macow gave it to Jimcaale, who immediately divided the money into three bundles; one to the sheikh to be given to the independent jury, one to be given back to Maleele’s family and the rest to another uncle of Meymuna.

As custom has it, the money was pushed around a few times,with the words “waa idinka guddooney, laakin ma rabno lacag” “ wax kalama qaadano” etc meant to show that it was not about the money.

Afar faataxo noo mara said sheikh Macow.

Afar faataxo kale ayaa loo maray reerka cusub . Jokes were exchanged once again. The womenfolk and the kids could hear the laughter and knew that the issue was resolved.

An hour or so later Meymuna was back to her hoori. Maleele was sitting on the edge of the bed careful not to say a word which might anger Meymuuna.

No more “macaaney” “abaayo” and other softie words of urbanisation he told himself.
“ ii waran? Soo ma fiicanid” he said in a voice that carried authority.
“Nabad” she replied in a low voice.

“Faatax aan marno inuu ilaahey na cafiyo, qoyskeenana ka dhigo kii isku waaro; wiil iyo caano, bash iyo barwaaqo” he continued…

The events of the last 24 hours has made him realise “Faataxo and duco” works.

After the faataxo he looked at Meymuna and realised she was smiling….

[Twist]

“saqajaan” “nijis” “gaal gaal dhalay”

PS: You ended it a good, smooth way. I was expecting some unexpected twist (just for cusbo and xawaash) and shit hitting the fan etc. lol

But most importantly the story carries a very important lesson about our dhaqan & xeer and stuff we almost entirely forgot of how our folks do our traditional laws back in baadiyaha. Thanks, duqa.

[Lamagoodle]

Twist, mahadsanid.

I had another ending; that Meymuna on coming back home will jump on him; kiss him on the mouth, ears and ask him "hadaad wax isku haayso soo daa" but I opted for this ending.

Thanks for the review mate

[BlackVelvet]

sometimes repeats what the speaker is saying to convince the speaker that he is being listened to

So that's why they do it! I witnessed this phenomenon a little while back, one of my habar yar does it all the time. I thought she was trying to annoy the other person or get them to shut up.

Twist, mahadsanid.

I had another ending; that Meymuna on coming back home will jump on him; kiss him on the mouth, ears and ask him "hadaad wax isku haayso soo daa" but I opted for this ending.

Thanks for the review mate

This ending is better, it's more authentic and ties in with the rest of the story


ps Learnt a lot about Somali dhaqan in this piece, we have a nice conflict resolution model (even if it's a bit of an oxymoron that in our society the husband is always assumed to be on the wrong during the "xeero"?).

Looking forward to your next story

[Lamagoodle]

Jasmine, good to know that you learnt one or two things.

[Lillaahiya]

It's done?

[Twist]

It's done?

Waa bar go', innit? I was looking forward to some messed up shit ending. But at least he put some valuable lesson about Soomaali xeer in the whole story, and particularly in this last part.

[SultanOrder]

Terrible ending smh

[Marques]

Terrible ending smh

Dont hate on my adeers story, it was awesome.

LamaG, for once it was a good ending and as cliche as it sounds i love a good ending. It closes a chapter well and installs a lesson of life into our minds, in this case the xeer.

After the Maqrib prayers, the Mumin family was invaded by the who is who of the village. If you had grey hair, you were there. If you had passed Juz Cama, you were there.

[SecretAgent]

Dis story should be turned into a movie I would pay to watch it

[DisplacedDiraac]

If you had passed Juz Cama, you were there.

Loved that bit.. Made me giggle..

I wish the story was longer..
You should definitely publish these stories.. I would turn up to your book signing just to get my copy signed..

[SultanOrder]

Abakar your adeer writes like a sociologist not like a storyteller. He gave us a commentary of how problems are solved using xeer laws and customs, he just decided to use two characters to illustrate that point. It was informative.

[QaaliDumar]

It's done?

Waa bar go', innit? I was looking forward to some messed up shit ending. But at least he put some valuable lesson about Soomaali xeer in the whole story, and particularly in this last part.

Yes laakin kanaa ending macquul ah.