The phone call

[Lamagoodle]

Chapter IV; Learning from the past

Jeele was convinced that there was something fishy about the events of the last two weeks.

He had prematurely ended the two previous phone calls because Jamiila had insinuated that there was something more than two neighbors who found each other.

There was something in Jamiila’s voice which sounded suspicious; macaano, examore and the general tone of the brief conversation reminded him of an episode in Toronto years ago.

Jeele had accidently ran into Ruqiya, one of his former primary school teachers. She was a young BB teacher (the general term for primary school teachers on training). She was not that old but relatively speaking should have been a wife to someone else when Jeele was attending primary school.

Rukia lived with her parents. She was an ambitious young woman who viewed educating others as her mission in life. She graduated from 15 May school near the presidential residence and her classmates included children from the who is who of the political elite.

Most of the kids in the 15th May School ( 15th may is communism’s youth day) came in expensive cars. Rukia herself was from a middle class family. Her father became a minister following somalia’s independence in 1960. He was spared the wrath of the 21st October revolution because he was viewed as an asset to the revolution.

In 1970 , Rukia’s father, was named the director general/permanent secretary to the ministry of Planning but two years later he died in a road accident. Her mom- Arliyo- was a medical doctor who worked at Muqdisho’s mental hospital – Maano koobyo – and later on the TB hospital.

At home, Rukia’s parents and siblings embraced the doctrines of the revolution. In due time, they became die hard Marxists who believed in the emancipation of the mind; gender equality, classless society and other ideas of the proletarian revolution despite being from the bourgeoisie class.

Secularism reigned at home. However, although religion took a back seat, there were occasional quran reading/practicing through “Subac” and on Fridays a goat was slaughtered for duca for the deceased Warfaa . Although spotting Ala tubo ( hairstyle) occasionally Mamma Arliyo always dressed in the fashion of that time; gown, shirt/blouse , high heeled shoes and big sun glasses.

Rukia’s brother , Guleed, attended a university in Bulgaria to study medicine. In the 1980s, while on leave he eloped with the local sheikh’s daughter - to Cagaaran ( a love nest on the outskirts of Marka). It was common for lovers to travel to Cagaaran in the 1980s; all you needed were two lovebirds, two young men from the ciyaalka xaafada and a car to take you to Cagaaran. Just like drive in weddings in Las Vegas USA, Cagaaran had many entrepreneurial wadaads who executed marriages in a few seconds. No tough questions were asked. Once, the engagement (Meher) is done, there was nothing much that could be done by the families of the bride and the groom. In most cases, the forbidden fruits have already been tasted.

Travelling to Cagaaran was simple. it was walking distance from the famous shrine of the Aw Cismaan. One week every year, somalis from every region congregated on this Marka; witch doctors, fortune seekers, lovers, government officials, curious tourists and entrepreneurs came to be seen and see .

The people of Marka – at least in the town centre- were often not like the Lamagoodles; although they were somalis they did not assimilate; they intermarried among themselves. They created their own dialect and embraced a culture that was far from the secular somali one; their females wore a black “cabaayo” in public and “alindhi” at home and were generally married off before they hit puberty.

The Marka girls did not interact with Lamagoodle boys and girls who they dubbed as being “reer koraad”. The Lamgoodles called them “Maqabiyos” so there was mutual understanding that the two societies were dissimilar. The Maqabiyos only ventured out to go to school which they left at primary school.

The reer markood girls and boys were married to their cousins at a younger age and as such, dating was a taboo- specifically to the Lamagoodle; so, the young marka ladies took every opportunity to cross the line; they could be heard shouting profanities from their rooms if you pass by the Aw Baale area which had high rise buildings.

It was very challenging to date a “Maqabiyo” . This was the pre-ICT days.

But as they say necessity is the mother of inventions. The annual “ Sheikh Cisman” festival to commemorate the founder of Marka was the time to meet Maqaiyos if you are a Lamagoodle.

The families of the Maqaiyos in recognition of the contribution of Sheikh Cisman to society allowed their daughters to visit the shrines (many of Aw cisman’s disciples were buried there) and they were very liberal albeit just for the week.

The Aw Cisman commemoration was held in a liberal spirit. A Woodstock for Somalis to defy social norms.

Marka was also near Ceel Jaale – which was a boot camp for socialism and this meant Lamagoodle boys and girls were in good supply.

It was to Marka and Cagaaran that Guleed eloped to with the local sheikh’s daughter.

Although it was common that lovebirds eloped to Cagaaran and it was an expected norm- as an institutional, this particular one created jitters ; the sheikh’s newly arrived son from Saudi Arabia, found a religious verse/hadith that stated that eloping was forbidden in Islam and as such the marriage was null and void.

Unbeknown to many at the time was the fact that several young men indoctrinated in Wahabism were returning to Somalia to engage in Wahabi evangelism. In simple terms, these missionaries were indoctrinated in Saudi culture with a few ounces of islam and they were expected to make Somalia part of the Wahabi kingdowm.

To them, the islam that was practised in Somalia was not islam. It was innovation at best and paganism at worst and should be fought.

Consisting mainly of young men who wore trousers that only reached the knees and spotting goat beards they declared eloping, mowliid and the many theological artefacts of islam in Somalia as “innovations” – Bidca” they claimed is unislamic and should be condemned.

Unlike older religious scholars these new kids on the blocks, these “ gardhuub” “ Akhwanul Muslim” were easily labelled “seel la bood” (fanatics” who were low on pedagogics as well as faith.

In fact, it was widely reported that many of the Seef-la-boods claimed that they were bastards because their parents eloped.

Rukia’s brother did the mistake of eloping with the seef-la bood’s sister and soon there was a religious war.

Fortunately, this was a time, when Somalia was institutionally strong, and the matter was taken to court. The judge asked for the plaintiff to give a statement and it soon transpired that the woman, Carfoon was not forced and that she loved Guleed. Case thrown out. It was not a crime to love, elope and choose a partner decreed the judge. We live in a nation of equality where women had rights too.

The last time Rukia and Jeele met was in the early 1980s. Jeele went to secondary school and Rukia was still teaching primary school. But, Jeele did not forget Rukia. He had a boy crush on her; the kind of crush that young boys and girls have on elderly women and men. Perhaps another form of Freud’s Oedipus complex which denotes a child’s desire to sexually become attracted to someone older.

So, during the last 30 or so years, Jeele did not forget Rukia. Unlike Jamiila, however, Rukia never humiliated him.

IThey met in Toronto where Jeele was attending a conference at Metro Toronto Convention Centre off Front Street West. At the conference's second day, Jeele a few somalis from the Etobicoke area.

As custom holds, these somalis inviited him to somali restaurants; Hamdi and Hamarweyne on Rexdale Blouvards and the many small business clustered around Weston and Lawrence Avenues.

On one of these occasions Jeele was taken a restaurant off Albin road which doubled as a fadhi-ku-dirir milieu; apparently men (most of them old) gathered in late evenings to discuss politics and marital problems.

It was common to see dozens of men who were supposedly evicted by their wives in a restaurant such as this one. This was the wailing wall where there appeared to be a race to the bottom; you could hear a newcomer to the act of “bacda madoow” complaining only to realise that his problems are minor because an old member of the calaalan club narrates a story that is unbelievable.

Occasionally, politics is also discussed; men who frequent this joint have titles such as Dottore, Injineere, duuliye etc to feel good and to show the world that once upon a time, they represented the crème de la crème of a once a beloved nation. Almost all the fadhi-ku-dirir sessions are ended on a note of “ dib baa loo noqonayaa” mantra that is ubiquitous everywhere Somalis meet.

In the afternoon, the restaurant is the venue for elderly women who judging by the way they dress, walk, and talk think that they are still teenagers in Muqdisho in the 1980s. Time appears to stand at standstill. Driving expensive cars, wearing expensive diracs and 20+ carat gold , they appear to engage in the world championship of “swaggering”. They could vaunt about everything including dirac, dahab and cars.

Jeele did not know that there were gender slots assigned to the restaurant. So, one afternoon he had taken a taxi to have some coffee, xalwo and refreshments.

Around 5 PM, he noticed that the parking area was beginning to come to life; more and more middle aged women wearing diracs and wrapped in gold were beginning to arrive. On entering the restaurant these patrons could be heard talking on the phone and saying “ War, I am at x “ and mixing english and somali in every sentence. Something was going on here, Jeele said to himself!

At about 6 PM, Jeele observes what he at first sight perceives as a middle-aged women approach him. At about 1,70M, this woman was relatively tall and very majestic in her move; her “laafayo” choreographed well with her jewellery; when she moved her legs, he shoes will make a cracking sound; when she moved her hands (Laafiyo) her bracelets will make a sound that said “watch this way, here comes a gold mine at your behest”

Waa waareey, soo Jeele ma aha ninkaan? Asked this stranger who smelled good from wearing expensive cadar and possibly drained in uunsi.

Haa walaal replied a rather embarrassed Jeele.

Ma I xasuusatid miyaa?

Maya, ee bal isu keey sheeg.

Waa Rukia, Dugisga sare ee Fiftiin Meey,

Ma Rukia Mataan – macalimadeeydii dugsiga hoose?

By the mention of ” macalimadeeydii dugsiga hoose” Rukia’s eyes were beckoning to him to be mindful 

Apparently, nowadays, claiming that someone has been your teacher denotes old age and Rukia’s social capital could be damaged and her image as a young woman could be tarnished.

He got the message and he added “ walaal ii waran?”

They hugged.

Instead of sitting down she said “kaale, gabdhahaan aan ku bare”.

The “gabdho” she is talking about are relatively old women.

Oddly enough, she did not remember his name so the introductory words were “ wiilkaan isku iskool baan ahayney”. Jeele wanted to say “ maya, waa macalimadeeyda” but he knew by now that will be futile in such an environment.

So, he played along.

They talked for about half an hour about everything; Rukia was working in a school in the York area. She had five kids from three different fathers. She was a divorcee and was available.

The notion of dating a former teacher did not cross Jeele’s mind; he referred to her as Macalin Rukia although it was apparent that she was uncomfortable with such as a label. He called her several times and discovered that Rukia was misinterpreting some of his signals. So, after many days of thinking he decided to cease with calling her.

But, this was August, 2013 and the woman involved is Jamiilo, who is in the same age group as him. There is no shame in dating her if that will be case. He doubted however that will happen.

He bought a calling card and dialed her number;

Hello, Jamiila, it is Jeele; ii waran walaal?

Nabad aboowe macaan! Seed tahay?

Nabad. Hadda Kaar ayaan telefoonka soo gashatay. Waxaan rabaa inaan si fiican u sheekeysano oo aan kaa wareeysto waxyaabo badan.

Aboowe macaan, xoogaa mashquul ayaan ahay; wiilkeeyga ayaa maanta dugsiga sare ka qalan jebinaayo oo xaflad ayaan u sameeynayaa she said in an apologetic tone.

Waa tahay beri ayaan ku soo wacay, said Jeele who by now was wondering why on earth this mother of a son who is graduating from high school was calling him “aboowe macaan”

There was alot to catch up on; what happened to the neighbourhood? what happened to her life? what happened to Deeqa, Caasha, Feynuus and the many girls he dated?

In addition, a promise is a promise, I have to call her tomorrow Jeele said to himself...
..

[QaaliDumar]

Labada qeybood oo danbe waa inaan si fiican ugu fariistaa.

[zidane88]

`Wiilka isku iskool baan aheyn`. Keep it coming LAMA -Goodle, loved it. Thanks.

[Marques]

It was common to see dozens of men who were supposedly evicted by their wives in a restaurant such as this one. This was the wailing wall where there appeared to be a race to the bottom; you could hear a newcomer to the act of “bacda madoow” complaining only to realise that his problems are minor because an old member of the calaalan club narrates a story that is unbelievable.
..

Good one. Jeeloow don't fall for her, remember she turned you down when you had nothing, now she wants you when she thinks your settled!

[Maandhow]

Lamagoodle ajajajajjajajaja sheekadaan inaba caadi ma aha, Lamagood Abdiwahab aragtidii uusoo jeediyey waa ila fiican tahay kawaran haddii website lagu daabaco si dad badan ugu wada faaiidaystaan. keep up the good work

[Lamagoodle]

Qaali iyo Zidane, thanks.

Marques lol. You really hate Jamiila, don't you?

Maandhoow, waan u fikirayaa ra'igaasi

[BuuloXubeey]

Very interesting story. This Jeelle character is it you lamagoodle? Mise qof aad taqaaniid.

[Lamagoodle]

Very interesting story. This Jeelle character is it you lamagoodle? Mise qof aad taqaaniid.

It is fiction saaxib. But, I have done some research.

[Ismail87]

Lol @ gabdhahan aan ku baree

It reminded me of my cousins wedding earlier this summer, I approached the table my mum was sitting and asked her something. Islaan ag fadhiday baa halkan ka soo booday oo tidhi "naa hebla inankan dheer ma adigaa dhalay" my mum said yeah then answered my question. Markay dhamaysay islaantii baa hadana soo booday oo tidhi "walal ii waran, aniga ima garanaysid laakin waxaan ahay gabadh inabtidaa ahee" hada islaantaasi hooyaday ka weyn.

[Lillaahiya]

Get to the goddamn convo already!

[BuuloXubeey]

Very interesting story. This Jeelle character is it you lamagoodle? Mise qof aad taqaaniid.

It is fiction saaxib. But, I have done some research.

Lool waxaan fiction uma eko. Sound very factual lol, nevertheless you have good writing skills and imagination. Goodluck and keep writing.

[Lamagoodle]

Lol @ gabdhahan aan ku baree

It reminded me of my cousins wedding earlier this summer, I approached the table my mum was sitting and asked her something. Islaan ag fadhiday baa halkan ka soo booday oo tidhi "naa hebla inankan dheer ma adigaa dhalay" my mum said yeah then answered my question. Markay dhamaysay islaantii baa hadana soo booday oo tidhi "walal ii waran, aniga ima garanaysid laakin waxaan ahay gabadh inabtidaa ahee" hada islaantaasi hooyaday ka weyn.

Dumarku maba koraan saaxib.

Mid ilkaha daadisey ba maalin dhoweyd i tiri "adeer "anigoo tareen saaran; intaan naxay baan ku iri " eedo, is deji adeer ma ihiye"


Buulo Xubeey; mahadsanid

[Ismail87]

Lol, they are comical walee inaad adna ayeeyo ku dhahdo bay aheyd islaantaas.

[Lamagoodle]

Get to the goddamn convo already!

[Daff]

Get to the goddamn convo already!

Qoftaan indho cadeeskeda maa ka yaabtay

Although spotting Ala tubo ( hairstyle) occasionally Mamma Arliyo always dressed in the fashion of that time; gown, shirt/blouse , high heeled shoes and big sun glasses.

Mama Arlio caadi maha, Ala tubo iyo itaageer