Clean house and good food are prerequisites for a happy marriage. As a single man, yYou may have that but without the scent of a woman (read cadar, uunsi) a clean house is not clean enough; without the xawaash food is not delicious enough; markaay ku tiraahdo aboowe macaan, oo aay cashada kuu keento iyadoo guntiino xiran, raashiin waliba wuu macaadaa. In addition, the suuro is wonderful ingredient ..BlueLion wrote:Lamagoodle wrote:My resolution is to make:
Posthumous hajj for my mom.
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Dear Bluelion,
It is with great sorrow that I read your marriage has crushed. I do hope and pray that you were not subjected to the humiliation of the “Bacda madoow” phenomenon.
The worst mistake one can make is to rush into another marriage after a failed one. I do hope that you have enough basich skills to live on your own for a while; cleaning and cooking for instance.
Maybe it is not a bad idea to explore the world out there.North America is not a good place to be if you have a crushed marriage. Materialism is not a good thing. Everything is about money in that materialistic society. Too few xusul baruurs nimcatul fashuuq because of the is caateeys hysteria.
The garoobs who would be your first choice and from who you could get some ajar (waxaan maqlay nabiga ayaa u duceeyey) are halaqos. They will according to my sources eat your flesh and through your bones. Xaalku waa laba qaawan isma qaadaan; waa qalam jalam when it comes to North America.
Where is there is no ceyr there is no nimco.
What you need primarily at the moment is to be told “I love you”. You want to hear those words after being told nacas and many other nasty things during the last few weeks of your marriage.
If you are not religious, may I suggest a trip to South America, Brazil in particular where you have a Caipirinha and gabar gacan lagu sameeyey, or Eastern Europe where you can date a porn star for less than a 7Sml Smirnoff. Avoid south Asia, naagahoodu waay shiraan markaay xaajadu meel dhexe mareeyso. Also Africa could be a place to be at laakin iska ilaali waa cudur miiran. Timaha la soo tidaceey yaasan ku sirin. Meel waliba waay ka adag yihiin ee ogow.
As a somali, you are used to the intoxicating odour of the uunsi and the cadar, the colours of ceelaan and the guntiino/dirac joy.
Marku xaalku Qaraabo qaarka dambe. Ajnabigu qaraabo ma aha.
As a middle aged somali man, there are a innumerable options which you may consider:
1.You have the xusul baruurs, nimcatul fashuuq, kuwa nabigu u duceeyey anigana aan amaano. They can be found at every garoob street which is located in every major city in Western Europe.
For this group, you’d need some pick-up lines like :
- "kaale maxaa saan kuu cadeeyey ma gacan baa lagu sameeyey?"
-“ilkahaagan sidaan u cad maxaad ku cadeeystaa? (this works with kuwa ilkaha xun)
- when she speaks in a broken foreign language, you ask “ma intaan ku dhalatay?”,
- point to their teenage daughters and ask “ma walaashaabaa?”
You will be a victim of the paradox of the plenty; too many xusul baruurs to choose from. Make sure you go for Gold. Kuwo caruur badan iyo kuwo faan badan; the yield in terms of money is excellent. Think about filling your wallet. You can buy everything with money.
When you are called aboowe make sure to call them xabiibi, xayaati iwm. Xusul baruurs love compliments. It is highly likely that they will drag you around late night aroos; a trophy to be shown around. Make sure you play your role.
A note of caution; iska ilaali kuwa daboolan ballo ayaay la dabool yihiin.
A second option is to travel to Afrika. Hargeisa/Xamar/Nairobi and find a dheeylo. Your north American passport will be enough to win hearts. You will become cadaawe even though you are as dark as charcoal. They will call you quruxloow even though you look like a misfit. If you opt for these dheeylos, ha keenin dibada; they will throw you to the wolves once they arrive and the vicious cycle will be repeated.
A third option is baadiyaha carli Soomaali. Waxaad heleeysaa gashaanti aan dhib badneeynin. If you are a good man with morals, you’d avoid this option because lama xumeeyn karo.
Sincerely yours
On behalf of we somali men that love Xaawaleys,
The Xusul baruur hunting section
Lamagoodle
how did i miss this post i think you edited because i read ur initial post it was about the haj only anyhow thank you very much khabiir lama to be honest, i dont wanna to get married because of food or clean house, i have that right now but live is too short to live alone or sleep alone
zina isnt an option, suxul baruur lol, horta suxul baruurtu sow kuwa yara waa wayn ee suxulka badhiyaystay sow maha lool, mise waa all single mother ta oo dhan? anyways, if i see one who has max two kids nd is under 30 i will use these lines
lol@ go for gold, no thank you, too much qaylo iyo buuq, i amnt looking for money i am looking for partner duqa
what do you mean kuwa africa jooga waa cudur miidhan? i wont be bringing anyone here because i amnt gonna live here for the rest of my life
lakiin maxa ii diiday gabadh xalkan joogta oo single ah? just because i have been married doesnt mean my only option is suxul baruur
Xusul baruur does not depend on age/ number of children. Those 30-40 are called xusul baruur xubul qalbi; those with many kids = Bangi socod - nimcatul rabi. Xusul baruur 45+ =Janna tag. If you have sinned like me, it is maybe your only ticket left (you have the chance to wed a young lass; use the wadaad card)
2 kids? Ma waalan tahay? There is a kiswahili saying; if you opt to eat pork make sure to eat the fattest one. At least go for 7 kids.
What do you mean by you are not looking for money? Sheeko baaraleey. Once you are divorced, money is the thing to look for. Gone are the days when Xaawaleeys called the shots. Turubka waa la isla bartay. Laba qaawan isma qaado.
Gabar dibada joogto ma xume laakin North America kuwa joogo waa HALAQOS. War joog. They will eat your flesh and throw your bones. It is same stody.
The good thing about Xusul baruur (apart from inuu nabigu u duceeyey anigana aan amaaney) is that you get everything without paying a cent.
P.s. islaantii aad kala tagteen xageey degantahay? Ilmaha adeer ayaay u baahan yihiin.
