Somali women and Ajanabi men

[Nomand]

your are about 6 years to late,

no one cares anymore, if i see a xalimo walking down the street with a badger or a racoon i say mashallah nice couple.

[saacJabshee]

Every Somali women that's in interracial marriage i have seen is over 26 and over. I was in a southall eating once in a resturant. there was a somali lady and ajanabi man with her. the man looked asian. the look on the peoples face wallahi was nothing but disgust and shame. it was unsually quite. you could cut the tension in that place with a knife (figure of speech). everytime the man looked up people would look away.then when he looks away they would stare at him again. maaskinka was looking for a smile. Me and him clicked eyes once and he smile and i didnt smile back. from there and onwards he didnt look up once till he left.for the first time in my life i actually felt deeply sorry for a women in interracial marriage. maskinta probably brought him to show him how we somalis eat in lounge around in resturants all day doing nothing but discuss politics. My god did she miscalculate. whats more disgusting is she had little boys with her. I did not see one adult raise them a smile and stroke them or pad them on the back like we normally we do. When they left it was like euphoria (not our euphoria) in there. talks, arguments, debates kicked off. I told an elder that i felt sorry for the couple and he said dont because they would do this to us if we went in their restuarants with an arab women. so i thought fuck em aswell.

[DANGIRL]

Somali men werent made for Somali women and the inverse is also true. If you wish to marry outside you dont need to hide behind reasons and excuses. Marry whosoever you desire and live your life. There are plenty of Somali men who are well educated and have decent to excellent jobs.

Moreover, if you choose your mate based on how much money he makes and how well learnt he is arent you forgetting other important qualities that should precede those idk like deen, akhlaaq dhaqan and etc? Money comes and goes and education is easily achieveable but competability, understanding, language, culture and deen arent. What language will the children learn?

Thirdly, for your own sake I hope you dont get divorced because no somali man will raise ajnabe kids.

Their only gold-digging when it comes to Somali men, but are lenient when it comes to ajanabi men and are willing to have fruits and tablecloths as their dawry.

Don't back track when you realize how ridiculous you initial statement was. You were the one who used a wide brush to describe every Somali woman who marries an ajnabi as one that has no self-respect. The idea that is being propagated here is that a Somali woman who marries an ajnabi is to be marginalized and God forbid if she gets divorced like the rest of the Somali women married to Somali man these days.

Somali women who are married to Somali man don't have it that great, and divorce is high in our community. So why do we pretend like marrying a Somali man is like marrying Prince Charming.

You have repeatedly insulted Somali women and you have to audacity to demand that we don't insult Somali man Take your taxi and ride into faraxland.

You seems like the type to mostly like to marry a CONvert with a criminal history, but I guess that beats marrying a Somali with criminial history, right?.

[Based]

your are about 6 years to late,

no one cares anymore, if i see a xalimo walking down the street with a badger or a racoon i say mashallah nice couple.

[zulaika]

It's 2013, nobody cares about who you marry

2nd that.. Yeah seriously who cares.. la bood shimbirka dooneysid in halal union of course

[Marques]

SummerRain, walaalow i understand where you are coming from. It hurts me when a young hardworking Somali girl is wedded to a wasted Faarax who has done nothing but sit on his backside all his life, just because she is facing community pressure to marry from within and to marry fast. Way ka mudantahay waxaas. I have seen Somali young niqabi/jilbaabi women oo loo guuriyey niman khaatka ruuga oo maqaaxi laga bixin la'yahay...waxay u nooshahay sida qof aan la qabin oo caruurtii keligeed bey xanaanaynaysaa...

One thing i thank my parents for raising me in the West is the opportunity to witness the multiculture and learn about the lifestyle of other people. I have made close friends from very different communities and i know their conduct in regards to relationships. There is some truth in the claims that conflicts can take a turning for the worse in ajnabi marriages (hence Somali oriented families will survive) but marriage should be studied way more subjectively now as the World is changing...traditional values and ways of life are fading away and nowadays the main thing i would seek in a male who was interested in my younger sisters is his taqwa. If a background check confirms he is respected among his peers and carries a good name overall i would not hesitate. There is only one factor that truly unites hearts and preserves purity in an otherwise inpure world, and that is Islam.

[FarhanYare]

It is really rough out there for my single Somali sisters. The gap between the two genders is so wide and it has become really difficult for our women to find good suitors for marriage. I was at a gathering last weekend, and it hit me the number of beautiful, educated, well mannered single girls in the room and in comparison to the males, wallahi there were only handful of them that would maybe come close to their accomplishments. Some of these girls were in their late 20s, some even in their 30s. I used to believe that a Somali woman is best married to a Somali man but with all the social issues our community is facing, and the large number of girls settling for good for nothing faraxs, I'v become a proponent of inter-racial marriage as one of the solutions. I think these girls shouldn't hold themselves back from starting a family because she has to marry a Somali man. This stigma attached to the girls who marry ajanabi is completely baseless considering that Somali men have nothing to offer. If a girl is a university graduate, worked hard to maintain a job and support her family, I find it unfair that she ends up with a taxi driver or a truck drive, or a political science degree holder chasing a job in Somalia (with no pay).

Girls should rethink about what they want out of a marriage and if they find a similar minded fella who is muslim, should go ahead and marry him. Parents should also support this, it is defnitely better than giving their daughters to some farax from their clan only for him to divorce her in couple of years.

i would not recommend somali sister to marry ajnabi at all only because from experience we have witnessed some of those who married ajnabi were left and divorced after few years of honeymoon with a baby they end raising on their own, some of the converts wind up leaving the religion after couple of months or are not practicing the religion as they supposed to. I understand most of the faraaxs are not educated or dont have a job, but a faraax qaaskiis waax udhaamo maleh whether he is looser or not.

[FarhanYare]

if there aren't enough guys in one area, move around, travel, most of the girls I know meet their significant other in a different country, city some even different continent, so why look for different race ? in this day and age you can move around without much hassle. the inconvenience of marrying outside your ethnicity greatly outweighs taking a flight from London to Stockholm, just saying.

[FarhanYare]

You haven't addressed the root causes of the issue though. Why is there a gender gap in education and profession? Is it because Somali men don't value education as much as Somali women? Do Somali men lack motivation or desire? Or do Somali men face more obstacles that prevent them from obtaining a diploma/degree or job? Perhaps women pursue diplomas/degrees that lead to gendered occupations which may be in higher demand (nursing, teaching, etc) while their male counterparts study fields that may not necessarily lead to a job right away (economics, chemistry, mathematics, etc)? If we don't collectively take a step back and look at the bigger picture, quick fixes such as marrying ajnabis won't help the current situation. I don't mean to knock personal preferences; however, I think if you're going to marrying someone who isn't Somali, then that decision shouldn't be based on the plight of Somali men but be a conscious personal choice. Without raising awareness, prescribing solutions, and learning through trial and error, we'll never reach a solution, which means the gender gap will only become worse.

p.s. @ all the "who cares, orod guurso xyz". Stop projecting your insecurities.

woooow! well said

[Twist]

your are about 6 years to late,

no one cares anymore, if i see a xalimo walking down the street with a badger or a racoon i say mashallah nice couple.

OK, come on guys! Bahasha hoos u dhiga marka, Ilaahay amarkii.

[barakaboy10]

so what's your point?

if a somali woman want to marry a non-somali man for any reason, it is up to her. but i can tell you this: it won't work.

the same goes for the men, too.

be proud of yourself and mary your kind.

[Keyblade]

thread cliff notes:

They can marry whoever they want, I really don't care, emphasis on the I don't care. But if you get divorced don't expect to be welcomed back with open arms because FUCK YOU THAT'S WHY. Ps: I don't care.

Omg who are you to dictate who I...I mean Somali girls can or can't marry? I spent too much money on Nora Roberts novels to not marry a whi...I mean ajnabi man.

Somali girls are willing to marry any ex-convict recent convert Ibn Latrell for a banana. HA HA banana, I never used that one before. Get it? Because Ibn Latrell is black and I'm raci...no? I'm out of gifs these days, work with me.

[STARKAST]

The 25-35 (+- here and there) generation have this problem of male/female gap in progress and thus suitable matches. The Ajanabi marrying group in understandable crisis.

Those over 35 here and there are mostly uneducated/Cultured. Thus no Ajanabi marrying.

On the other hand both genders under 25 in the west are mostly educated equally minus the late immigrants.
Those that marry Ajanabi from this age group have really no excuse to marry non-Somalis.

(London/U.k demographics and observations ) What's your observations in your cities.

Banning Khat in the U.K will reform many Somali males in the U.K for the sake of the women and families they have/leave behind.

[FarhanYare]

thread cliff notes:

They can marry whoever they want, I really don't care, emphasis on the I don't care. But if you get divorced don't expect to be welcomed back with open arms because FUCK YOU THAT'S WHY. Ps: I don't care.

Omg who are you to dictate who I...I mean Somali girls can or can't marry? I spent too much money on Nora Roberts novels to not marry a whi...I mean ajnabi man.

Somali girls are willing to marry any ex-convict recent convert Ibn Latrell for a banana. HA HA banana, I never used that one before. Get it? Because Ibn Latrell is black and I'm raci...no? I'm out of gifs these days, work with me.

this dude is a big time troll

[Based]

thread cliff notes:

They can marry whoever they want, I really don't care, emphasis on the I don't care. But if you get divorced don't expect to be welcomed back with open arms because FUCK YOU THAT'S WHY. Ps: I don't care.

Omg who are you to dictate who I...I mean Somali girls can or can't marry? I spent too much money on Nora Roberts novels to not marry a whi...I mean ajnabi man.

Somali girls are willing to marry any ex-convict recent convert Ibn Latrell for a banana. HA HA banana, I never used that one before. Get it? Because Ibn Latrell is black and I'm raci...no? I'm out of gifs these days, work with me.