zulaika@lool
Macaanto u know why i love u? When u think 'pretty' u think 'Basra' now should I not love thee macaan by virtue of that chain of thought.
Personally i think being extremely pretty has automatically made me get addicted to attention! Walaahi--if a man does not look at me thrice---- all hell will break loose.(Twice and once is a red flag of course! Thrice is an Orange alert flag, u know like the terrorris alerts?)! Women also stare at me, but i can usually distinguish from those of envy stare, those of lesbian stare and those of simply--Wow' Mashaalaah stare! I love attention!

Walaahi, i swear. I think i have a condition, psychologist have not diagnosed it yet. Sometimes i will just go the Mall just to be 'stared at' -- is that insane or what? OF course i end up ruining my budget by over shopping. When we go to a wedding or party-- some of my ugly friends refuse to go if i am going --they have their own jealousy complex which i cannot get into now.

Some of them actually want to go with me since it offers them hundreds of attention by virtue of my association. Men insitictively gravitate towards me-- in that processes it has made me develop this complex attitude syndrome. I tend to have a lot of 'forced' kibiirness that is NOT my real personality. Walaahi, I think the 'real' Basra is a sweet, shy, and somewhat civilly friendly. But in public, i tend to be anti friendly--and not at all engaging, particularly to strangers whom i have caught them starring too much at me.Anyway back to this complex i developed,-- i have observed that in order to control this influx of dellusional farahs who think are in my league'-- i have to have attitude towards them, i purposely appear anti social or snobbish just to avoid them pursuing me.I am just content with the stare and air declaration of love! If i was sweet and civil to them-- then i might as well just fall in love with the first one to offer me attention or speak to me. I tend to be distant, vaguely rude, and unattainable generally. This is a calculative coping mechanism that i have developed to protect myself--it is very hard when everyone wants you, and undresses you with their eyes. I mean--walaahi ---total strangers i meet in the elevator-- and u know how --elevators rides are extremely low duration--can't be more that 30 seconds-- i find strangers hinting on sex to me!
"Oh lovely weather today--good just to stay in bed and have fun"
Of course i am left saying---

I beg your pardon?
IN my mind of course. I never engage or encourage to engage in conversation with strangers. I must admit i like the attention of the Pang Wow On their faces upon seeing me. I must also admit that -- i go out of my way to blush red, and wiggle my eyes-- in acknowledging their stares, smiles, those bold ones-- who wink. Although i confess the winkings i sort of not a fan of, very vulgar-- those ones i never give them that encouragement-- they are usually the crazy stalkers types.Anyway zulaika, i must conclude it is ALL your fault for encouraging me to talk about myself like this.Caudubilaahi!
Hhuuuuh.....Huiuuuiisssh...

Feels so much better to confess!
