TEACHER ARRESTED.. - A public school teacher was arrested today at
John F Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a
flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square,
a slide rule, and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, the Attorney General said he believes the
man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify
the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math
instruction.
"Al-gebra is a problem for us," the Attorney General said. "They desire
solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a
search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and
refer to themselves as 'unknowns,' but we have determined they belong
to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in
every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are
3 sides to every triangle."
When asked to comment on the arrest, President George W. Bush said,
"If God had wanted us to have better Weapons of Math Instruction,
He would have given us more fingers and toes."
White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent
or profound statement by the President.
Teacher arrested at JFK!
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- AbdiWahab252
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