VALENTINES
Posted: Wed Feb 11, 2009 11:28 am
VALENTINES IS THE MOST POINTLESS OVERRATED OVERPRICED EVENT IN THE YEAR. IT IS A TOTAL GIMMICK TO SUCKER PEOPLE INTO SPENDING MONEY BECAUSE THEY THINK THERE IN "LOVE " WHICH IN FACT THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS "LOVE " ITS JUST A HUMAN INSTINCT WE HAVE TO FEEL WANTED AND TO RAISE OUR SELFESTEAM!
THESE ARE THE REASONS WHY I HATE THIS SHITTY DAY
The goofy little box of hearts that taste like sidewalk chalk with white confessions of love embossed on their florescent bodies. “Be Mine,” “I’m Yours,” “You’re Sweet,” and “Love.” Love? Do you really even like someone if you’re giving them chalk to eat? I would prefer an “It’s not you, it’s me” chalk heart, or a “We need to talk” heart. They seem more appropriate.
A small boy in a diaper flying around shooting people with arrows? This dose not make me want to snuggle, it’s just creepy! What’s next, an old man in a red suit sliding down chimneys… oh… wait… But seriously, the whole idea of some pudgy progeny of Aphrodite shooting arrows at my heart, with the intention of construing a long and lasting relationship, it’s a little frightening.
The first few notes of “I Will Always Love You” can cause such an intense need to vomit that I find myself running for the nearest toilet while my skin starts to tingle and I break out in a rash.
I have no snarky comments for this, it is what it is. Love should be every day. Not celebrated because the creepy diaper man says it’s time. And that’s my whole point, Valentines Day really is a mass marketed collection of pointless gifts that you are going to look at in two weeks and wonder which corner of your room you can hide it in, or simply throw it away. So, if you’re going to celebrate Singles Awareness Day, please make a memory, don’t buy a pointless, pressure filled, going to the landfill present.
HORTA WHY DO SOMALIS CELEBRATE THIS BULLSHIT
THESE ARE THE REASONS WHY I HATE THIS SHITTY DAY
The goofy little box of hearts that taste like sidewalk chalk with white confessions of love embossed on their florescent bodies. “Be Mine,” “I’m Yours,” “You’re Sweet,” and “Love.” Love? Do you really even like someone if you’re giving them chalk to eat? I would prefer an “It’s not you, it’s me” chalk heart, or a “We need to talk” heart. They seem more appropriate.
A small boy in a diaper flying around shooting people with arrows? This dose not make me want to snuggle, it’s just creepy! What’s next, an old man in a red suit sliding down chimneys… oh… wait… But seriously, the whole idea of some pudgy progeny of Aphrodite shooting arrows at my heart, with the intention of construing a long and lasting relationship, it’s a little frightening.
The first few notes of “I Will Always Love You” can cause such an intense need to vomit that I find myself running for the nearest toilet while my skin starts to tingle and I break out in a rash.
I have no snarky comments for this, it is what it is. Love should be every day. Not celebrated because the creepy diaper man says it’s time. And that’s my whole point, Valentines Day really is a mass marketed collection of pointless gifts that you are going to look at in two weeks and wonder which corner of your room you can hide it in, or simply throw it away. So, if you’re going to celebrate Singles Awareness Day, please make a memory, don’t buy a pointless, pressure filled, going to the landfill present.
HORTA WHY DO SOMALIS CELEBRATE THIS BULLSHIT
