Traditional Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
American Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are suprised when the cow drops dead.
French Capitalism: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
Japanese Capitalism: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them worldwide.
German Capitalism: You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.
Italian Capitalism: You have two cows, but you dont know where they are. You break for lunch.
Polish Capitalism: You have two bulls, Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them.
British Capitalism: You have two cows. They are both mad.
Russian Capitalism: You have two cows. You count them again and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.
Swiss Capitalism: You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.
Canadian Capitalism: You have 12 cows. You start a hockey team.
Chinese Capitalism: You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.
Irish Capitalism: You have two cows. You feed them potatoes and wonder why they emigrate.
Israeli Capitalism: You have two cows. They open a milk factory, an ice cream store, and then sell the movie rights. They send there calves to Harvard to become doctors, so who needs people?
Cuban Capitalism: You have two cows. They try to swim to Florida.
Taliban Capitalism: You have two cows. They go into hiding, They send radio tapes of their mooing.
Iraqi Capitalism: You have two cows. They are biochemical weapons.
Californian Capitalism: You have millions of cows. They make real California cheese, Only five speak English, Most are illegals.
Arnold likes the ones with the big udders
Disney Capitalism: You have two cows. They dance and sing.
DEMOCRATIC: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none, You feel guilty for being successful, Barbara Streisand sings for you.
REPUBLICANISM: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none, So?
SOCIALIST: You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor. You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.
COMMUNIST: You have two cows. The government seizes both and provides you with milk, You wait in line for hours to get it, It is expensive and sour.
