Questions to ask a prospective husband

[DANGIRL]

The Big Issues:

1)What makes him angry and how does he deal with his anger?

Does he blame everybody but himself?

Does he bear grudges ("I'll get him back one day!")

Has he ever physically or mentally abused anyone with whom he was angry?

-------------------------------------------------------------------
2) How does he behave during a crisis?

Does he blame everyone except himself?

Does he become hostile towards an uninvolved member of an ethnic group which is known to abuse followers of Islam?

What steps does he take to face and deal with pressure?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
3) How does he feel about women's rights in a Muslim home?

Did he ever observe abuse from his father towards his mother?

Did he ever act to prevent abuse at home? How?

Did he believe that his father was always right?

Does he believe that all women deserve abuse?


-----------------------------------------------------------
4) How does he deal with money matters?

Does he save his money for the future?

Does he give money to charities?

When he decides to buy something, will he consult his spouse in making the decision?

---------------------------------------------------------------------
5) What does he expect from his wife and children?

How would he react if his expectations are not met?

What is his vision of family life?

Would he pitch in and co-operate in family chores and the upbringing of children?

-------------------------------------------------------------------
6) What are his family like?

Are his family religious, or will you be the only one in hijab?

Does their approach to Islam differ from yours - will you be the only "fundamentalists" in a family whose Islam is more "traditional"?

[DANGIRL]

7) What is his medical background?

Has he ever had an AIDS test, and what was the result?

Is there any history of major illness in his family?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
What are his views on education of women and children?

Will he allow you to continue and/or return to education?

What are his views on education and schooling of children? If you have strong views on Islamic schools, home schooling, etc., find out if his views coincide with yours.

Will he take part in the children's upbringing and education? Will he teach them Qur'an?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
9) Where does he want to live?

Does he want to settle in the country where you now live?

Does he want to return to his homeland? Does he want to move to a new country altogether?

Will he take your feelings into account when deciding where to live?

Does he aspire to a large and luxurious home, or will he settle for less?

Does he want to live in the heart of the city, in the suburbs, or in an isolated rural setting?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

10) Food:

Does he insist on only eating the food of his own ethnic group, or are his tastes more eclectic?

Will he insist on having every meal cooked from scratch, or will you be able to have convenience food or take-away on busy days?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

11) Smoking:

Does he smoke? Do any of his family or friends smoke? Will he let people smoke in your non-smoking home?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
12) Going Out:

How does he feel about women going outside the home? studying outside? working outside?

Will he want to "check out" your friends and only let you visit those of whom he approves?

How does he feel about women driving?

[Newboy]

that is so long thread, does your told all that stuff

[Dun]

What!

Damn, is all that necessary?

Aid's test?

Whoa........wtf is all that about?

Ain't nobody puttin NOTHING in my pee hole.

[Citizen X]