It is really rough out there for my single Somali sisters. The gap between the two genders is so wide and it has become really difficult for our women to find good suitors for marriage. I was at a gathering last weekend, and it hit me the number of beautiful, educated, well mannered single girls in the room and in comparison to the males, wallahi there were only handful of them that would maybe come close to their accomplishments. Some of these girls were in their late 20s, some even in their 30s. I used to believe that a Somali woman is best married to a Somali man but with all the social issues our community is facing, and the large number of girls settling for good for nothing faraxs, I'v become a proponent of inter-racial marriage as one of the solutions. I think these girls shouldn't hold themselves back from starting a family because she has to marry a Somali man. This stigma attached to the girls who marry ajanabi is completely baseless considering that Somali men have nothing to offer. If a girl is a university graduate, worked hard to maintain a job and support her family, I find it unfair that she ends up with a taxi driver or a truck drive, or a political science degree holder chasing a job in Somalia (with no pay).
Girls should rethink about what they want out of a marriage and if they find a similar minded fella who is muslim, should go ahead and marry him. Parents should also support this, it is defnitely better than giving their daughters to some farax from their clan only for him to divorce her in couple of years.
Re: Somali women and Ajanabi men
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 7:41 am
by Twist
O Lord! Here we go again!
Re: Somali women and Ajanabi men
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 7:41 am
by BlackVelvet
I support this message -
It's sad though feels like you're taking something away from your children - they won't be Somali in the same way. But yeah being Somali is not worth much in a spouse if that's all there is.
Re: Somali women and Ajanabi men
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 7:42 am
by SummerRain
Twist
Forgive me, I couldn't help but rant.
Re: Somali women and Ajanabi men
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 7:46 am
by Lamagoodle
SummerRain,
You have a point. In the diaspora at least, we are becoming like the African Americans in the US ( I read an interesting research on this issue). From my observations more somali women study at universities than somali men. Back in Somalia, it is the women who are taking responsibilities for the families. In the diaspora, somali women are the unsung heroes in the family. While the dad is busy in Marfish and village parliaments, the women mind the kids.
Re: Somali women and Ajanabi men
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 7:48 am
by grandpakhalif
go ahead, Somali men lose nothing out of this, we got plenty women to choose from + since somali women hate polygamy we got others who love it. PLus there's no shortage of good somali women for us but there's a shortage of somali men.
Somali women in thew west have been absorbed by Western wonderland they want white dress for their wedding(which is non muslim tradition), they want Prince Charming loool their standards are way too unrealistic, anyways good luck with your new Ajnaaib husband, when he beats your ass dont come crying to Somali community, now ur an outkast part of their community since women belong to their husband, you better learn Patois kkkkkkkkkkkkk.
Re: Somali women and Ajanabi men
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 7:49 am
by Twist
Summer, just wanted to take the piss, dear.
Re: Somali women and Ajanabi men
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 7:56 am
by Colonel
It's 2013, nobody cares about who you marry
Re: Somali women and Ajanabi men
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 8:09 am
by SummerRain
BlackVelvet wrote:I support this message -
It's sad though feels like you're taking something away from your children - they won't be Somali in the same way. But yeah being Somali is not worth much in a spouse if that's all there is.
Thanks for the support, BV.
If anything being half Somali will save them the despair of having to be related to a bunch of f*ked confused people....think of it that way. In all seriousness, I used to feel the same way and emphasised too much on taking the Somalinimo away from the children. However, I realised that raising a healthy, happy...functing family unite is far more worth it than what their racial background it. And considering the mess the Somali society everywhere is in, I encourage sisters to emphasis less on the race of their spouse and more on what he can offer them.
Lamgoodle wrote:SummerRain,
You have a point. In the diaspora at least, we are becoming like the African Americans in the US ( I read an interesting research on this issue). From my observations more somali women study at universities than somali men. Back in Somalia, it is the women who are taking responsibilities for the families. In the diaspora, somali women are the unsung heroes in the family. While the dad is busy in Marfish and village parliaments, the women mind the kids.
Mind passing that research my way, if you have it. Thanks in advance.
Also some would argue, that these Somali women made their choice and have to live it. I used to be one of those who believed in that too, but I came to realise that most of us women are given grief if we ventured outside, thus pressured to settle for less. I think our communities are increasingly mirroring the same issues as the AA in the US preciesly because our family structure has broken down. The same observations you saw regarding Somali women is also true for AA women, and it goes without saying that their men are also caught up in similar predicatment as our men.
Re: Somali women and Ajanabi men
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 8:12 am
by Typhoon
I know some of these somalis girls that people consider well "educated" all they are after is a men we provides everything for them, these girls have degrees but lack every skill required to maneuver through the job market and life.
ajanabiga waxay ko doneen is noting but financial stability while they sit on their asses and balloon like a walrus.
Its people like somalis boys that build america just study the new york immigrants
Herr Eaglehawk is an amateur anthropologist who can see beyond the smoke screen, naagaha somaliyeew ceebtoda allah ha astuuro anaku ma astuuri karne, siiil politcis ay wadaan
axadka startgaray threadkan wa mid jilecsan, warya naagahan cilmihi no keenaan wallahi waan gumaysan doona taas iga qor, hadi geela no raacin magacayga Eaglehawk la ma dhaho
ku laha good girls, warya liberal bulhsitkaga nagala tag, the word good is relative and there are more somali boys in university then girls what backward inner city are you from.
Most Somalis girls ( handling hooyo kitchen business) never passed high school and all marry early, waryay propagandada ha la joojiyo, hadi kale wallahi I will make a Detailed analysis on the current state of the Somali woman abroad, hada walaasha nacin, nin mahi
This for my empire drug pushers, degree holding hustler’s explorers of the Western civilization I ride with you any day and I have more hope in your dad wadadka masjidka iskaga jira iyo naagahan wax ma tarka ah, western education iyo experience ba lugu gasariyay, siilkoda bay naf ka dooneen, wajigina gubay.
Atleast nin german hadi gursadan wa wax, dad somali ka lita bay wada guursadan, equal opportunity ma naqanay, wa maxay jileecan dumarka somliyeed
Re: Somali women and Ajanabi men
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 8:15 am
by saacJabshee
you know what your right. My cousin who is on benefits is marrying a beautiful 22yr teacher looool. till now ask him how he does it and his reply is usually 'she is stupid'. seriuosly these graduate somali ladies need to come back to us. this way the children she has with us will become educated and good youngsters. but if she has children with a ajanabi those children wont do no good fo somali community. you are a greedy women if this is how your thinking. like my brother granpa said. we aint really worried there is plenty of somali girls out there that want us. you can run away suits me fine.
okay look at it like this. Am graduating next year. Imagine if i go and marry an ajanabi women because i couldnt not find a somali women who was a doctor? is that really appropriate way of thinking? My child with a foreigner will be somali. But since i will be quite well off (inshallah) why would i then want to pump money into a foreign family. id rather share my wealth with somali family then ajanabi. Thats what these girls will do. They'll marry a foreigner because she couldnt find a somali astronaut and part of her earnings will go to a ajanabi family.
saacJabshee wrote:you know what your right. My cousin who is on benefits is marrying a beautiful 22yr teacher looool. till now ask him how he does it and his reply is usually 'she is stupid'. seriuosly these graduate somali ladies need to come back to us. this way the children she has with us will become educated and good youngsters. but if she has children with a ajanabi those children wont do no good fo somali community. you are a greedy women if this is how your thinking. like my brother granpa said. we aint really worried there is plenty of somali girls out there that want us. you can run away suits me fine.
okay look at it like this. Am graduating next year. Imagine if i go and marry an ajanabi women because i couldnt not find a somali women who was a doctor? is that really appropriate way of thinking? My child with a foreigner will be somali. But since i will be quite well off (inshallah) why would i then want to pump money into a foreign family. id rather share my wealth with somali family then ajanabi. Thats what these girls will do. They'll marry a foreigner because she couldnt find a somali astronaut and part of her earnings will go to a ajanabi family.
bro for every Somali man there are around 5 single Somali females, so we got a big advantage imagine if you are educated and have big paycheque? You will have so many Xalimos knocking on ur door because they are very desperate the competition is fierce, all you have to do is lay back and they will come to you. This is why I encourage polygamy to solve this problem but most these retarded women they think they degrading themselves, well tell them to enjoy the ajnaaib because somali men are eating good walle.
Re: Somali women and Ajanabi men
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 8:22 am
by Typhoon
saacJabshee wrote:you know what your right. My cousin who is on benefits is marrying a beautiful 22yr teacher looool. till now ask him how he does it and his reply is usually 'she is stupid'. seriuosly these graduate somali ladies need to come back to us. this way the children she has with us will become educated and good youngsters. but if she has children with a ajanabi those children wont do no good fo somali community. you are a greedy women if this is how your thinking. like my brother granpa said. we aint really worried there is plenty of somali girls out there that want us. you can run away suits me fine.
okay look at it like this. Am graduating next year. Imagine if i go and marry an ajanabi women because i couldnt not find a somali women who was a doctor? is that really appropriate way of thinking? My child with a foreigner will be somali. But since i will be quite well off (inshallah) why would i then want to pump money into a foreign family. id rather share my wealth with somali family then ajanabi. Thats what these girls will do. They'll marry a foreigner because she couldnt find a somali astronaut and part of her earnings will go to a ajanabi family.
meesha Dr Phil maha yaah stop making your personal problems the reality of somali in general.
don`t believe the hype, somali girls want to make excuses for their own disapionted life, we live in the west where duumarka iyo ragu siman yahin, why calacal on us
they angery because we can over leverage and the will never be a margin call on us, but they good like in the hostile and competitive husband market.
Re: Somali women and Ajanabi men
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 8:24 am
by BlackVelvet
SummerRain wrote:
BlackVelvet wrote:I support this message -
It's sad though feels like you're taking something away from your children - they won't be Somali in the same way. But yeah being Somali is not worth much in a spouse if that's all there is.
Thanks for the support, BV.
If anything being half Somali will save them the despair of having to be related to a bunch of f*ked confused people....think of it that way. In all seriousness, I used to feel the same way and emphasised too much on taking the Somalinimo away from the children. However, I realised that raising a healthy, happy...functing family unite is far more worth it than what their racial background it. And considering the mess the Somali society everywhere is in, I encourage sisters to emphasis less on the race of their spouse and more on what he can offer them.
.
I know but those are your people - your identity and that "where did I come from" question that most teenagers ask themselves would never be an issue. You can literally count back and you know all their names if nothing else. There's a stability that comes with that. I am not sure I have reached that level, nimanka Somaliyeed in aan ka quustey or met a non Somali who I thought I could give that up for - the Somaalinimo of my kids. But who knows, never say never.