SERIOUS QUESTION ON CULTURE SHOCK AMONG SOMALI GIRLS

[somali4lyf]

I just had to experience one of the worst nightmares in my life. So I decided to throw the question here and perhaps get some mature advice/idea on how to deal with a such situation.

Have you ever experienced a situation where a close relative girl decided to live with a non-Somali man (a muslim Indian) without her parents/relatives approval? How did you manage to calm down the mom of the girl knowing that the girl left and no one can locate where she is? My auntie is worried and I fear that her blood pressure might go up again. According to my knowledge, the girl is not engaged to the guy in Islamic way. This thing has been bugging me since the girl left the house of my aunt a month ago. For a matter of fact, she is my cousin but I am disappointed with her decision.

Please share with me your experiences, ideas, suggestions. Also, don't forget to make dua for us. May Allah make it easy for us, ameen!

[ElfRuler]

Why did she felt the need to run away with some Indian guy? Did the family reject the guy perviously?


May Allah make it easy for the girl's mother. Nothing worse than not knowing what state your child is in.

[somali4lyf]

Why did she felt the need to run away with some Indian guy? Did the family reject the guy perviously?


May Allah make it easy for the girl's mother. Nothing worse than not knowing what state your child is in.

Ameen bro. Yeah she brought him the house previously without telling anyone. My auntie was shocked. She was caught in bewilderment as to why her daughter would do that. There wasn't anything I would say forced her to leave her home. I suspect a little difference between the mom and the girl but come on that shouldn't be that huge. Also, you know the girls of these days bro in North America. Too much Dr. Phil and other shit...just fuelled the culture shock and separated kids from their parents. Wallahi jahwareer...allow na astur!!

[hargaysaay]

is not it the never ending circle of parent and their childrens dis-approvals of whats the norm their rebelling against the established tradition
but in your families case i really don't see whats so highly bothersome to raise your aunts blood-pressure(sorry i know that sounds mean) but really
you gotta know that young people these days appreciate and hold dear any thing thats intimate your cousin is obviously crazy in love with the guy
and in my opinion nothing will change her mind, so the best advise you can give aunty is just let it go and except the fact that there is possibility
she might have Muslim Indian son in law and she should thank god that he is not at least a low life Jamaican who provides nothing but a big shaft and weed.

[somali4lyf]

is not it the never ending circle of parent and their childrens dis-approvals of whats the norm their rebelling against the established tradition
but in your families case i really don't see whats so highly bothersome to raise your aunts blood-pressure(sorry i know that sounds mean) but really
you gotta know that young people these days appreciate and hold dear any thing thats intimate your cousin is obviously crazy in love with the guy
and in my opinion nothing will change her mind, so the best advise you can give aunty is just let it go and except the fact that there is possibility
she might have Muslim Indian son in law and she should thank god that he is not at least a low life Jamaican who provides nothing but a big shaft and weed.

bro if you haven't started a family yet of haven't had kids, I and you may not understand what parents go through in such instances. It is quite a blessing to be a parent and witness the emotions that comes with offsprings in both sorrow and joyous days. Life is a cycle and for a parent that grew up in strict cultural setting, it is tough for them to accept such incidents. Let us pray for the best, insha Allah!!

[Vivacious]

Somali parents should just accept the choices of their kids wallahi. What's the use of disapproving who they want to be with when the outcome is running away with the man? I understand the feeling of the mum and not having your daughter abiding by the culture, she should be thankful that at least the guy is a Muslim. Best thing to do for now, is stay calm, pray for her safety and wait until you hear from her again. No one can stay that long from their parents, specially girls. She will definitely come around. And may Allah make is easy for your family.

[Turbulence]

These kids are really dumb and they usually get bored of whatever they are doing really fast. So if you will not cut ties with them permanently I would advise the girl's mother to just call her if she has her daughter's contact information and instruct her not to get pregnant just so she does not end up supporting the bastards kids that will result from such unholy relationship. Sh!t like this comes with raising kids in this kind of environment my friend. Somali parents from what I have seen always react a little too late instead of being proactive and doing what needs to be done from the first signs their kids show of going astray from the path they want them to tread.

There was a similar story that happened in my city few years ago. This Somali girl and her young sister ran away with this Iranian guy who said he was muslim but was really Bahai. The younger girl was underage so the family called the cops and they were both brought back by the police . Within few months the older girl ran away again by herself. She eventually came back when the guy left her but with a little girl she had for him. I don't mean to sound a pessimist but this story does not appear like it will end in a good way but who knows. Best thing to do is for the mother to communicate with her daughter while controlling her emotions.

Young girls do dumb sh!t all the time. I was just watching this video on youtube. You don't know if you should feel sorry for them or laugh them sometimes.

[Lillaahiya]

Somali parents should just accept the choices of their kids wallahi. What's the use of disapproving who they want to be with when the outcome is running away with the man?

There are a couple situations when someone should run away from home but leaving to be with a man isn't one of them. Even if the parents disapprove (which they have a right to), ayada maxaa eriye? Tan naxdinta iyo inkaarta hooyadeed iyo reerkeed ayaa ku dhici doona oo waxba umaa hagaagayaan.

[DisplacedDiraac]

If she bought the guy a house.. She isn't a young girl but rather a grown woman.. I doubt there's much you or anyone can do.. Unless you pay the bloke off.. Help her mother get through this and make dua for the daughter..

[Vivacious]

Somali parents should just accept the choices of their kids wallahi. What's the use of disapproving who they want to be with when the outcome is running away with the man?

There are a couple situations when someone should run away from home but leaving to be with a man isn't one of them. Even if the parents disapprove (which they have a right to), ayada maxaa eriye? Tan naxdinta iyo inkaarta hooyadeed iyo reerkeed ayaa ku dhici doona oo waxba umaa hagaagayaan.

I know, tan duco waalid ma arkeyso. Dhaqankii wuu badalmay sooma ahan. Caasi waalideyn shaqo kuma laha what a parent says or not. Once disapproved, running away is all they do. But,the thread maker said she brought the man home. On top of that he is Muslim. I guess it was better for the mum to have approved. Look now, she ran away. Hooyada maxaaba u yaala aan ka eheyn murugo?

[Kukri]

...allow na astur!!

Amiin!

[grandpakhalif]

The real question is where the fock is the father?

[blitzkrieg]

I think your aunt, as hard as this may seem, should just wait, perhaps attempting to contact her occasionally. I assume your cousin is an adult, so there isn't much your family can actually do to make her return. If your aunt wants her back regardless, however, she should let her know that she's welcomed home, lest the hindi dude leaves her.

[LiquidHYDROGEN]

So she ran away from home for some timojilic?

[somali4lyf]

The real question is where the fock is the father?

The dad passed away like 10 years ago.