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Lol so last week my guy and his family came around to my family to ask for my hand in marriage. It's nice because then my dad knows I'm talking to him and he knows the deal but then at the same time I'm sitting here thinking wtf because my dad has it in his head that this is officially my husband, bearing in mind we're getting married in a years time. He says things like mamada wac (meaning my mother in law) and keeps advising me to be a good daughter in law to them because his parents are quite old. I'm like dad this guy isn't even my husband yet and I could change my mind tomorrow. On top of that he told the whole world about it, I don't really appriciate being congratulated as if I'm already married.

What's the delay? If you both wanna marry each other get it done.

Unless you're having second thoughts

Why is the proposal happening a year prior?

Yes,other kneegrows need to know that you have been sold(joke).no more bids will be accepted.you are no longer up for auction.after this juncture, kneegrows should not be shukaansying you after the verbal contract was agreed.you are like a house with the sold sign. Seriously,your father is adhering to centuries old dhaqan.

His family came to ask ur hand years before arooska? If I were ur dad I wouldn't let them nd I would've slapped you for inviting a man that you arnt ready to marry to my house.

Your dad is soo chilled out MashAllah

Had that been my dad he would have been like 'Hadaanad hada diyaar u ahayn guur, shuqul gaalo ha ila imanin nayaa waa naagta'

chelseaforever wrote:His family came to ask ur hand 3 years before arooska? If I were ur dad I wouldn't let them nd I would've slapped you for inviting a man that you arnt ready to marry to my house.

Whether it in 6months or 3 years, it's somalia tradition or islamically even as it back dates to century's. The dating scene should be known to your family and every guy you speak to should be a potential husband so introducing one to your family is respectful and shows your intentions between you and the guy is clear. Obviously with Somalis once they meet the future husband he is already your husband.. I think her father is just giving her good advice such as keep good relations with in laws and so on.
And what's wrong with waiting to marry your "boyfriend" in a year or years time? At least she's not dating random guys in between then getting married quick to a farax cos she might expire ! I call that thinking ahead! Get to know the person no rush

And I dont think she said 3 years.. Where did you get that from?

Your f-king an arab all the beating your about to receive
People talking about 3 years she probably has tyrone on the side just like every somali female from London

on a serious note you see how fast her dad was willing to give her away I bet if that was a somali guy he would have to jump through millions hoops

Shaaxmacaan wrote:

chelseaforever wrote:His family came to ask ur hand 3 years before arooska? If I were ur dad I wouldn't let them nd I would've slapped you for inviting a man that you arnt ready to marry to my house.

Whether it in 6months or 3 years, it's somalia tradition or islamically even as it back dates to century's. The dating scene should be known to your family and every guy you speak to should be a potential husband so introducing one to your family is respectful and shows your intentions between you and the guy is clear. Obviously with Somalis once they meet the future husband he is already your husband.. I think her father is just giving her good advice such as keep good relations with in laws and so on.
And what's wrong with waiting to marry your "boyfriend" in a year or years time? At least she's not dating random guys in between then getting married quick to a farax cos she might expire ! I call that thinking ahead! Get to know the person no rush

And I dont think she said 3 years.. Where did you get that from?

I've never seen that kinda dhaqan before, where's it from?

Me personally I wouldn't allow a guy to come to my house and ask for gacantayda unless the meher/wedding is happening in a month or two.

Kun ban la sheekaysanaya ee why am I going to tie myself to one and allow him to meet my family when a date for a meher is in a years time? Bilaaban mid ka shidan barta within that space of time? Hadhow na ka naftayda raali geliyay the most ban meesha ka soo saari oo my address siin laha.

Shaaxmacaan wrote:

chelseaforever wrote:His family came to ask ur hand 3 years before arooska? If I were ur dad I wouldn't let them nd I would've slapped you for inviting a man that you arnt ready to marry to my house.

Whether it in 6months or 3 years, it's somalia tradition or islamically even as it back dates to century's. The dating scene should be known to your family and every guy you speak to should be a potential husband so introducing one to your family is respectful and shows your intentions between you and the guy is clear. Obviously with Somalis once they meet the future husband he is already your husband.. I think her father is just giving her good advice such as keep good relations with in laws and so on.
And what's wrong with waiting to marry your "boyfriend" in a year or years time? At least she's not dating random guys in between then getting married quick to a farax cos she might expire ! I call that thinking ahead! Get to know the person no rush

And I dont think she said 3 years.. Where did you get that from?

I edited my comment but she said years so It could be more than 3 years, so what if things don't work out? Or if she changes her mind as she said? will she than bring next farax she is dating with to meet her father? I think she should have waited until she is serious abt him nd he is ready to marry her.

Inaayah .. That's exactly what I am saying.

Inaayah wrote:

Shaaxmacaan wrote:

chelseaforever wrote:His family came to ask ur hand 3 years before arooska? If I were ur dad I wouldn't let them nd I would've slapped you for inviting a man that you arnt ready to marry to my house.

Whether it in 6months or 3 years, it's somalia tradition or islamically even as it back dates to century's. The dating scene should be known to your family and every guy you speak to should be a potential husband so introducing one to your family is respectful and shows your intentions between you and the guy is clear. Obviously with Somalis once they meet the future husband he is already your husband.. I think her father is just giving her good advice such as keep good relations with in laws and so on.
And what's wrong with waiting to marry your "boyfriend" in a year or years time? At least she's not dating random guys in between then getting married quick to a farax cos she might expire ! I call that thinking ahead! Get to know the person no rush

And I dont think she said 3 years.. Where did you get that from?

I've never seen that kinda dhaqan before, where's it from?

Me personally I wouldn't allow a guy to come to my house and ask for gacantayda unless the meher/wedding is happening in a month or two.

Kun ban la sheekaysanaya ee why am I going to tie myself to one and allow him to meet my family when a date for a meher is in a years time? Bilaaban mid ka shidan barta within that space of time? Hadhow na ka naftayda raali geliyay the most ban meesha ka soo saari oo my address siin laha.

In somalia shukansi is caadi and the guy comes to the house to talk to the girl in front of her parents instead of taking out of the house but I understand what you mean, it's best to only bring a guy wen its serious and the nikkah is months away.. But I don't think I could bring a guy when the nikkah is a month or 2months away, it's too short notice, what wedding dress will you find in that short of a period?! However if your secure with your man obviously and ideally I personally would bring him at least 4 months before the wedding

chelseaforever wrote:

Shaaxmacaan wrote:

chelseaforever wrote:His family came to ask ur hand 3 years before arooska? If I were ur dad I wouldn't let them nd I would've slapped you for inviting a man that you arnt ready to marry to my house.

Whether it in 6months or 3 years, it's somalia tradition or islamically even as it back dates to century's. The dating scene should be known to your family and every guy you speak to should be a potential husband so introducing one to your family is respectful and shows your intentions between you and the guy is clear. Obviously with Somalis once they meet the future husband he is already your husband.. I think her father is just giving her good advice such as keep good relations with in laws and so on.
And what's wrong with waiting to marry your "boyfriend" in a year or years time? At least she's not dating random guys in between then getting married quick to a farax cos she might expire ! I call that thinking ahead! Get to know the person no rush

And I dont think she said 3 years.. Where did you get that from?

I edited my comment but she said years so It could be more than 3 years, so what if things don't work out? Or if she changes her mind as she said? will she than bring next farax she is dating with to meet her father? I think she should have waited until she is serious abt him nd he is ready to marry her.

Totally agree, she sounds doubtful about the future with the guy regardless if it's in a couple months or years time lol I don't think I have the guts to bring different faraxs to my dad.. Only one shall make it!