His Before Yours (advice for the sisters b4 guur know this)

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SoMaLiSiZz
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His Before Yours (advice for the sisters b4 guur know this)

Post by SoMaLiSiZz »

BissmeAllah w salato w salamo cala Rasool Allah

Asalam Alaikom WarhmatuAllah Wbaraktuh

His Before Yours

‘Abd al-Malik (RA) said: “When ‘Awf ibn Muhallim al-Shaybani, one of the most highly respected leaders of the Arab nobility during the jahiliyyah, married his daughter Umm Iyas to al-Harith ibn ‘Amr al-Kindi, she was made ready to be taken to the groom, then her mother, Umamah came into her, to advise her and said:

‘O my daughter, if it were deemed unnecessary to give you this advice because of good manners and noble descent, then it would have been unnecessary for you, because you posses these qualities, but it will serve as a reminder to those who are forgetful, and will help those who are wise.

‘O my daughter, if a woman were able to do without a husband by virtue of her father’s wealth and her need for her father, then you of all people would be most able to do without a husband, but women were created for men just as men were created for them.

‘O my daughter, you are about to leave the home in which you grew up, where you first learned to walk, to go to a place you do not know, to a companion to whom you are unfamiliar. By marrying you, he has become a master over you, so be like a servant to him, and he will become like a servant to you.

‘Take from me ten qualities, which will be a provision and a reminder for you.

‘The first and second of them are: be content in his company, and listen to and obey him, for contentment brings peace of mind, and listening to and obeying one’s husband pleases Allah.

‘The third and fourth of them are: make sure that you smell good and look good; he should not see anything ugly in you, and he should not smell anything but a pleasant smell from you. Kohl is the best kind of beautification to be found, and water is better than the rarest perfume.

‘The fifth and sixth of them are: prepare his food on time, and keep quiet when he is asleep, for raging hunger is like a burning flame, and disturbing his sleep will make him angry.

‘The seventh and eight of them are: take care of his servants (or employees) and children, and take care of his wealth, for taking care of his wealth shows that you appreciate him, and taking care of his children and servants shows good management.

‘The ninth and tenth of them are: never disclose any of his secrets, and never disobey any of his orders, for if you disclose any of his secrets you will never feel safe from his possible betrayal, and if you disobey him, his heart will be filled with hatred towards you.

‘Be careful, O my daughter, of showing joy in front of him when he is upset, and do not show sorrow in front of him when he is happy, because the former shows a lack of judgment whilst the latter will make him unhappy.

‘Show him as much honour and respect as you can, and agree with him as much as you can, so that he will enjoy your companionship and conversation.

‘Know, O my daughter, that you will not achieve what you would like to until you put his pleasure before your own, and his wishes before yours, in whatever you like and dislike. And may Allah choose what is best for you and protect you.” (Jamharah Khutah al-‘Arab, 1/145)


Fe Aman Allah Arrow
Last edited by SoMaLiSiZz on Fri Nov 11, 2005 7:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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dhuusa_deer
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Post by dhuusa_deer »

you are wasting time, you got work to do remember?
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LionHeart-112
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Post by LionHeart-112 »

^^there many people who love to read the articles posted by thsi sister.

How many people have actually read the shit you write???NONE!
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dhuusa_deer
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Post by dhuusa_deer »

[quote="LionHeart-112"]^^there many people who love to read the articles posted by thsi sister.

How many people have actually read the shit you write???NONE![/quote]

and you're point is?

Somalisizz,

get busy!
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LionHeart-112
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Post by LionHeart-112 »

U are too stupid to get my point...

my point is she is more influential than you are. This is her work..where's yours?
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dhuusa_deer
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Post by dhuusa_deer »

[quote="LionHeart-112"]U are too stupid to get my point...

my point is she is more influential than you are. This is her work..where's yours?[/quote]

still what is that got to do with anything? that is totally irrelavent to what she posted.
Mowhawk
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Post by Mowhawk »

‘Abd al-Malik (RA) said: “When ‘Awf ibn Muhallim al-Shaybani, one of the most highly respected leaders of the Arab nobility during the jahiliyyah, married his daughter Umm Iyas to al-Harith ibn ‘Amr al-Kindi, she was made ready to be taken to the groom, then her mother, Umamah came into her, to advise her and said:"

Sister Ciid wannaagsan

This non-slave nobility Arab gentleman and his wife Ummah had very well elaborated the conditions of their time, but what has this to do in this day and age for non Arab Muslims? Don't misunderstand me, that kind of placid woman they portrayed above is still every guy's fantasy wife Laughing , but today in the world we live, after a while of marriage life, I will feel that I'm married to a robot rather than a human. Times change.
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kambuli
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Post by kambuli »

Sister,

Something is wrong here. Shocked Naagtu waa inay caag ahaataa miyaa Question

The funiest is this one"

‘The seventh and eight of them are: take care of his servants (or employees) and children, and take care of his wealth, for taking care of his wealth shows that you appreciate him, and taking care of his children and servants shows good management."

What children? Aren't the children hers? Shocked
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Globetrotter-
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Post by Globetrotter- »

Somalisis, adigu ma xaas baad tahay?

This seems to be a case of enslavement than a case of marriage!

This is a classical case of female subordination by using religion.
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