The Biography of Sumubariidi
Posted: Tue May 24, 2016 1:21 am
Sumu was born in a small central town called Caabudwaaq. His father was Marixan and his mother was from the Saleban tribe. Sumu was born premature aka dhicis, as a child Sumu missed all his developmental milestones both mentally and physically. He looked very small compared to other children in the town. Kids nick named him Fadhiid. When kids played 5 a side soccer Sumu was just added to either team as a bonus and the other team didn’t even care, because they knew, it wouldn’t make a difference.
Sumu’s family moved Xamar after his father was transferred to Xalane base. Sumu was always eager to prove people wrong no matter what. After he finished high school Sumu enlisted in the SNA and wanted to be part of the presidential guard known as koofi guduud. To join the presidential guard you have to meet these 3 requirements.
1-Same tribe as the president
2-SNA family history
3-pass the toughest military training in the SNA.
Sumu met the first two requirements easily. First day all the recruits showed up, they were handed their uniform. In the SNA or in any other country in Africa you don’t get to pick your size, basically one size fits all policy applies. If you are fat, too bad, you have to suck your fat in and squeeze into your uniform, if you are skinny, your uniform will become a parachute every time the wind picks up, if you are both skinny and short like Sumu RIP. When Sumu showed up for the drill formation wearing his oversized uniform, the drill sergeant didn’t know what to make of it, all he saw was a little dark tent in the middle. The drill sergeant yelled get that ugly looking tent out of my formation. With a weak voice Sumu said it is me Sir, I am one of the new recruits. The drill sergeant removed his vintage oversized sun glasses and took a closer look at Sumu and said Authobilah mina sheydani rajim, then burst into laughter, other recruits also joined in the laughter. Drill sergeant wasn’t pleased with his new recruit’s behavior and yelled TIGTOONOOW. They all fall into formation including Sumu and he started shivering.
Drill sergeant Laf-Dhuun-Gashay was well known in the SNA, every soldier who went through his training knew what it was like, on average the SNA will bring 100 new recruits and only 5 or 6 will graduate, and those 5 or 6 will rise through the ranks quickly and become great leaders in the SNA, those were the good old days. But due to nepotism he now has to train people like Sumu, who shouldn’t be there to begin with. Lafdhuungashay made a phone call to taliyaha ciidanka Ina Lax wase, The sergeant asked why are you sending me these new recruits who are not even fit to clean my toilet. Don’t expect me train ciyalka koolada dhuuqda, and who the FOCK sent me Sumu, every time i say Tigtoonoow he starts shivering. How can I train qof jareynaayo. He will be going home right now.
Sumu was thrown out of the SNA. He went home and sat in a corner, his father came home and saw the sadness in his eyes. Sumu’s father started gabay to cheer him up. This gabay was later turned into a song by Hassan Adan Samatar.
Ducaysane wiilkayoow < Oh my blessed son
Anoo dan yar baan ku dhalay < I begot you poor.
Dabadeed waxan galay askari < Then became a soldier.
Anoon waligay dalacin iyo < Without any promotion,
Dablaan kugu soo korshoo < I raised you a rank-less soldier.
Enjoy the full song here
To Be Continued……
Sumu’s family moved Xamar after his father was transferred to Xalane base. Sumu was always eager to prove people wrong no matter what. After he finished high school Sumu enlisted in the SNA and wanted to be part of the presidential guard known as koofi guduud. To join the presidential guard you have to meet these 3 requirements.
1-Same tribe as the president
2-SNA family history
3-pass the toughest military training in the SNA.
Sumu met the first two requirements easily. First day all the recruits showed up, they were handed their uniform. In the SNA or in any other country in Africa you don’t get to pick your size, basically one size fits all policy applies. If you are fat, too bad, you have to suck your fat in and squeeze into your uniform, if you are skinny, your uniform will become a parachute every time the wind picks up, if you are both skinny and short like Sumu RIP. When Sumu showed up for the drill formation wearing his oversized uniform, the drill sergeant didn’t know what to make of it, all he saw was a little dark tent in the middle. The drill sergeant yelled get that ugly looking tent out of my formation. With a weak voice Sumu said it is me Sir, I am one of the new recruits. The drill sergeant removed his vintage oversized sun glasses and took a closer look at Sumu and said Authobilah mina sheydani rajim, then burst into laughter, other recruits also joined in the laughter. Drill sergeant wasn’t pleased with his new recruit’s behavior and yelled TIGTOONOOW. They all fall into formation including Sumu and he started shivering.
Drill sergeant Laf-Dhuun-Gashay was well known in the SNA, every soldier who went through his training knew what it was like, on average the SNA will bring 100 new recruits and only 5 or 6 will graduate, and those 5 or 6 will rise through the ranks quickly and become great leaders in the SNA, those were the good old days. But due to nepotism he now has to train people like Sumu, who shouldn’t be there to begin with. Lafdhuungashay made a phone call to taliyaha ciidanka Ina Lax wase, The sergeant asked why are you sending me these new recruits who are not even fit to clean my toilet. Don’t expect me train ciyalka koolada dhuuqda, and who the FOCK sent me Sumu, every time i say Tigtoonoow he starts shivering. How can I train qof jareynaayo. He will be going home right now.
Sumu was thrown out of the SNA. He went home and sat in a corner, his father came home and saw the sadness in his eyes. Sumu’s father started gabay to cheer him up. This gabay was later turned into a song by Hassan Adan Samatar.
Ducaysane wiilkayoow < Oh my blessed son
Anoo dan yar baan ku dhalay < I begot you poor.
Dabadeed waxan galay askari < Then became a soldier.
Anoon waligay dalacin iyo < Without any promotion,
Dablaan kugu soo korshoo < I raised you a rank-less soldier.
Enjoy the full song here
To Be Continued……
How did I miss this shit. Haywire is the best
Horta why you guys have the funniest nick names. Ina Lax waxeeye, Xoor Xoor etc