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have a laugh

Posted: Thu Nov 17, 2005 12:56 pm
by Dhaga Bacayl
#2,3,4 and 10 had me rolling on the floor..


A MAGAZINE RAN A "DILBERT QUOTES" CONTEST. THEY WERE LOOKING FOR PEOPLE
TO SUBMIT QUOTES FROM THEIR REAL-LIFE DILBERT-TYPE MANAGERS. HERE ARE
THE TOP TEN FINALISTS:

1. "As of tomorrow, employees will only be able to access the building
using individual security cards. Pictures will be taken next Wednesday
and employees will receive their cards in two weeks." --(This was the
winning quote from Fred Dales, Microsoft Corp. in Redmond, WA)

2. "What I need is an exact list of specific unknown problems we might
encounter." --(Lykes Lines Shipping)

3. "E-mail is not to be used to pass on information or data. It should
be used only for company business." --(Accounting manager, Electric Boat

Company)

4. "This project is so important, we can't let things that are more
important interfere with it." --(Advertising/Marketing manager, United
Parcel Service)

5. "Doing it right is no excuse for not meeting the schedule." --(Plant
manager, Delco Corporation)

6. "No one will believe you solved this problem in one day! We've been
working on it for months. Now, go act busy for a few weeks and I'll let
you know when it's time to tell them." --(R&D supervisor, Minnesota
Mining and Manufacturing/3M Corp.)

7. Quote from the Boss: "Teamwork is a lot of people doing what I
say." --(Marketing executive, Citrix Corporation)

8. My sister passed away and her funeral was scheduled for Monday. When
I told my Boss, he said she died on purpose so that I would have to miss

work on the busiest day of the year. He then asked if we could change
her burial to Friday. He said, "That would be better for me."
--(Shipping executive, FTD Florists)

9. "We know that communication is a problem, but the company is not
going to discuss it with the employees." --(Switching supervisor, AT&T
Long Lines Division)

10. One day my Boss asked me to submit a status report to him concerning

a project I was working on. I asked him if tomorrow would be soon
enough. He said, "If I wanted it tomorrow, I would have waited until
tomorrow to ask for it!"

Posted: Thu Nov 17, 2005 1:02 pm
by *HannaH*
Number 10 is jokes..lol...and number 4 is just retarded...

Posted: Thu Nov 17, 2005 1:03 pm
by suga_n_spice
BALOO

i don't find humor in any of them.
bunch of non-sense!!! Rolling Eyes

Posted: Thu Nov 17, 2005 1:08 pm
by *HannaH*
BALO...You wouldn't dee, unless you had a real job..like Dhaga the truck driver....

Now, get back to work!....I'd like pepper and salt on those fries please. Very Happy

Posted: Thu Nov 17, 2005 1:11 pm
by suga_n_spice
BALOO

yeah i guess!!!
i can just imagine hannah urinatin in some poor person's drink!!! yuck!!!

Posted: Thu Nov 17, 2005 1:18 pm
by B-MAX
Dilbert is the only charater that i read in that part of Comics in a Daily Newspaper.

Do you know about that Comic Character La Cucaracha that pissed off alot of white folks for running funny jokes on white people?

Posted: Thu Nov 17, 2005 1:40 pm
by Dhaga Bacayl
[quote="suga_n_spice"]BALOO

i don't find humor in any of them.
bunch of non-sense!!! Rolling Eyes[/quote]

Of course not.

Posted: Thu Nov 17, 2005 1:41 pm
by suga_n_spice
BALOO

whats that suppose to mean D B??? Laughing

Posted: Thu Nov 17, 2005 1:45 pm
by Dhaga Bacayl
[quote="suga_n_spice"]BALOO

whats that suppose to mean D B??? Laughing[/quote]


"QUOTES FROM THEIR REAL-LIFE DILBERT-TYPE MANAGERS"

It wasn't meant to be funny, rather stupid.

Most of them don'teven make sense yet, those are managers in real world..

Posted: Thu Nov 17, 2005 2:15 pm
by *HannaH*
Dhaga,

I bet you feel like a dog chaising his tail huh?...going in cirlces..
Lol

Balo, I don't do things like that my child...Im an old lady...Im not as flexible as I use to be so I can't hold the cup and squat that long .