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*joke of the day- *

Posted: Thu Feb 08, 2007 9:40 am
by Babygal
this is a thread for eveyone to leave a joke.




This is on of my favorate bad jokes...Laughing

a guy decides to walk accross a very beautiful beach, crystal clear water where you can see the pebbles, white sand, and a palm tree in the middle; as he was walking he heard a woman cry he goes up to her and asks what's wrong she says..."i'm 22 and i have no arms and legs and i've never been kissed" so he kisses her and walks off she cries again goes up to her again and asks her again what's wrong she says again "i'm 22 i have no arms and legs and i've never been screwed" so he picks her up and throws her in the water and says "hey lady!! now you've been screwed" and walks away.lol

Re: *joke of the day- *

Posted: Thu Feb 08, 2007 10:38 am
by Niya
lol!
The World's oldest question has been answered.

FINALLY! THE TRUTH COMES TO LIGHT!

A chicken and an egg are laying in bed.
The chicken is leaning against the headboard of the bed smoking a
cigarette.

The chicken smiles through half closed eyes as he watches a ring of
smoke drift slowly toward the ceiling.

The egg, looking pissed off and dissatisfied, abruptly grabs the
sheet, rolls over, and says, ..."Well, I guess we finally answered

THAT."

Re: *joke of the day- *

Posted: Thu Feb 08, 2007 10:40 am
by LAFO-LAFO
A blind man gone for walk as he was walking along the street he smelled Kaluun...There were grocery selling kaluun...his subconsciousness therefor ... thinking irrationally( women are standing there). He said HI LADIES Laughing Laughing

Re: *joke of the day- *

Posted: Thu Feb 08, 2007 10:40 am
by HELWAA

Re: *joke of the day- *

Posted: Thu Feb 08, 2007 10:42 am
by Grant
A guy bought a new Lincoln Navigator for $42,500.00 (with monthly
payments of $560.00). He and a friend go duck hunting in upper Wisconsin.

It's mid-winter. And of course, all the lakes are frozen.

These two guys go out on the ice with their GUNS, a DOG, and of course
the new NAVIGATOR.

They decide they want to make a natural looking open water for the
ducks to focus on, something for the decoys to float in.

Now making a hole in the ice large enough to invite a passing duck, is
going to take a little more power than the average drill auger can
produce.

So, out of the back of the new Navigator comes a stick of dynamite
with a short 40 second fuse.

Now our two Rocket Scientists, afraid they might slip on the ice while
trying to run away after lighting the fuse and becoming toast, along
with the Navigator, decide on the following course of action: they
light the 40 second fuse; then, with a mighty thrust, they throw the
stick of dynamite as far away as possible.

Remember a couple of paragraphs back when I mentioned the NAVIGATOR,
the GUNS, and the DOG...???

Let's talk about the dog: A highly trained Black Lab used for
RETRIEVING, especially things thrown by the owner.

You guessed it.

The dog takes off across the ice at a high rate of speed and grabs the
stick of dynamite, with the burning 40 second fuse, just as it hits the ice.

The two men swallow, blink, st art waving their arms and with veins in
their necks swelling to resemble stalks of rhubarb, scream and holler
at the dog to stop.

The dog, now apparently cheered on by his Master, keeps coming.

One hunter panics, grabs the shotgun and shoots the dog. The shotgun is
loaded with #8 bird shot, hardly big enough to stop a black lab.

The dog stops for a moment, slightly confused, then continues on.

Another shot, and this time the dog, still standing, becomes really
confused and of course terrified, thinks these two geniuses have gone
INSANE.

The dog takes off to find cover, UNDER the brand new Navigator.

The men continue to scream as they run.

The red hot exhaust pipe on the truck touches the dog's rear end, he
yelps, drops the dynamite under the truck and takes off after his
master.

Then "" "" "" "" "" KAAABOOOOOOOOOOOOM "" "" "" "" "" ! ! ! !

The truck is blown to bits and sinks to the bottom of the lake, leaving
the two idiots standing there with "I can't believe this just happened"
looks on their faces.

The insurance company says that sinking a vehicle in a lake by Illegal
use of explosives is NOT COVERED by the policy.

And he still had yet to make the first of those $560.00 a month payments.

The dog is okay. . .doing fine.

....And you thought Rednecks lived in the South..........

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Re: *joke of the day- *

Posted: Thu Feb 08, 2007 10:46 am
by lookz
^^^^^^ i dont get it Confused

Re: *joke of the day- *

Posted: Fri Feb 09, 2007 12:59 pm
by Babygal
lol at grant&niya

lookz I guess you aren't the joke type....or you are just having a bad time.

Re: *joke of the day- *

Posted: Fri Feb 09, 2007 1:59 pm
by J-EASY
Not even remotely funny.............try a lil harder shawtii.

Re: *joke of the day- *

Posted: Fri Feb 09, 2007 3:17 pm
by Gatspy
A man spoke frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" the doctor asked. "No, you idiot!" the man shouted. "This is her husband!"

Re: *joke of the day- *

Posted: Fri Feb 09, 2007 3:45 pm
by HELWAA
Laba Haween ah, oo u kala dhashay magaalooyinka Muqdisho iyo Hargeysa, ayaa ku wada kulmay meel Kawaan ah, oo laga iibsado Hilibka; waxaana dhex-maray Sheekadan is-xifaaleynta ah:-(a) Haweeneydii reer Muqdisho ayaa ku tiri Kawaanlihii:-" Aboow, rubuc kiilo Hilib ah ii cabbir". (b) Haweeneydii reer Hargeysa ayaa ku tiri tii reer Muqdisho:-" Walaallo, rubuc kiilowga Hilibka ah, ma Bisad baad siisaneysaa..?!!!. (a) Haweeneydii reer Muqdisho kama aaney jawaabin Su'aashaas...(b) Haweeneydii reer Hargeysa ayaa markeedii ku tiri Kawaanlihii:" Waaryaahe, waar Jeex Hilib ah noo dhiib"....(a) Haweeneydii reer Muqdisho, ayaa iyada oo aargoosaneysa ku tiri tii reer Hargeysa:-" Hee, Jeex dhan see yeeleysaa..?!! ma Amuur maa qabtaa, mase Waraabaa tahay...?!!! (b) Haweeneydii reer Hargeysa ayaa Warkeedii ku soo gaabsatay, oo tiri:" Naa ina kala mari, ismaba af-garaneynee..".!!!.



Laughing

Re: *joke of the day- *

Posted: Fri Feb 09, 2007 3:53 pm
by HELWAA
This guy needs to use the bathroom really badly-
he's almost nutsting his pants. He goes into a
bar, where its really crowded, and everyone is
having a great time. He looks around everywhere,
but there's no bathroom in sight. However, he
does spot a little set of stairs in the back, so
he goes upstairs, and he finds himself in a
little room, with a hole in the middle of the
floor. Well, this guy REALLY has to go, so he
looks around, drops his pants, and quickly does
his thing in the hole. Once he's done, he pulls
up his pants, and saunters downstairs like
nothing happened. When he gets downstairs,
there isn't anyone there, and the bartender is
crouched under the bar. Well, the guy asks the
bartender "Where is everyone?" The bartender
says, "Where were you when the s h i t hit the fan?"

Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

Re: *joke of the day- *

Posted: Fri Feb 09, 2007 4:07 pm
by HELWAA
This reer xamar joke is killing me..........ala beerka Laughing Laughing Laughing

"hada kahor baa will reer xamar ah tuug soo bursaday suu usoo ordaayay u xafadiisa damcay
inuu galo mise alaabka xirinbo wuu garacay gow gow albabki aabahiis aa so kacay yaa weeye u dhahay aabo aweeys waaye tuug aa i bursahooya igu fur adoogi aa dhahay ee hadi tuug ku bursahooyo guriga maa keene kac soo dhumi soo noqo"


Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing ..@adoogi

Re: *joke of the day- *

Posted: Fri Feb 09, 2007 4:13 pm
by HELWAA
looooooooooooool at this one Laughing


"Nin reer miya ah ayaa dhiganaayey class xisaab ah, maalin maalmaha
ka mid ah ayaa waxaa la weydiiyey su’aal oo la rabey in uu ugu jawaabo xisaab ahaan oo aheyd sida tan:

Hadii xero ay ku jiraan 10 neef oo ari ah uu dhurwaa usoo galo, islamrkaana ka cuno labo neef meeqa neef ayaa ku soo hareyso xeradaas?.Ninkii reer miyigii wuxuu ku jawaabay:"Ma dhurwaagii aan aqaaney wacadale uusan xabad uga tageyn ilaa uu ka dhameeyo mahee"!

Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing ..............tonight i laughed enough.

macsallama pple.