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coming to the knuckleheads on here for islamic advice was a big mistake

ManD333q wrote:You asked her about her life after you proposed

This.

i don't mean to be crude, but unless she has a super-seel that can turn water into caano-geel, it's not worth it. marriage should not be rushed and it should not be putting you into a financial hole.

Haxxor,

Never ever do a loan for meher...Don't accept high meher. Somali men take meher lightly, if for example your father never paid the meher and he dies with that on his head...Allaah may help him... I was asking the other day my uncle whose two wives passed away long time ago to pay their meher to whoever was the heir...So never accept a high meher...Danahooda weeye huuno.. I can't stand families that complicate marriage

Waxaad ku tidhaahdaa; "Anigu that is how much I can afford, and I don't like loans"...and let us see what they say, if they insist you to take a loan..Cagta ka cawee huuno, let them find their daughter a husband...

Sorry for confusion, I didn't mean they said I would have to take a loan out to able afford mehr. I said I would have to take loan out if I was able to afford it.

Negritude wrote:

ManD333q wrote:You asked her about her life after you proposed

What? We knew each out long way before we considered marriage, this was through education and anything between us was 100% business/work except few or so. It's pretty obvious she's good woman on way she acts, and she thinks the same for me.

This problem is fixed, till next year at least inshaallah.

Thank God I don't have to worry about this silly tradition.

Samatr wrote:Thank God I don't have to worry about this silly tradition.

How so? Ma cadaan baad guursatay?

Samatr wrote:Thank God I don't have to worry about this silly tradition.

Meher is apart of the diin, it's not a silly tradition!

Ninkaga deenta lagu leyahay adina wa lagugu leyahay, meher ama lasoo tugay ama deen maxa lagu fala? If he has it ka shaq shaq if not soo yahay ku heyso.

Shirib wrote:

Samatr wrote:Thank God I don't have to worry about this silly tradition.

Meher is apart of the diin, it's not a silly tradition!

taking out a loan to marry someone is ludicrous, no where does it say to have a wedding you can't afford or pay a ridiculous sum of money for someone that's supposed to care about your well being sounds more like a burden.

FariyoAlif

Why she gotta be cadaan?

haxxor wrote:
Problem is, even though I know her father well, she said to me that they might ask mehr that's too high and I'll have to take out loan to afford it. Note: She would settle for less but her family refuses.

So, what are islamic views on this one?

Parents have no say bro, and she should be reasonable and know what you can afford.

HutuKing01 wrote:Sare u kac ku yimid qiimaha Siilka

Samatr wrote:Thank God I don't have to worry about this silly tradition.

Unless her puss.y is lined with gold and gushes forth the elixir of life, i wouldn't bother...

^

abdi.ismail wrote:Unless her puss.y is lined with gold and gushes forth the elixir of life, i wouldn't bother...

Samatr wrote:

Shirib wrote:

Samatr wrote:Thank God I don't have to worry about this silly tradition.

Meher is apart of the diin, it's not a silly tradition!

taking out a loan to marry someone is ludicrous, no where does it say to have a wedding you can't afford or pay a ridiculous sum of money for someone that's supposed to care about your well being sounds more like a burden.

That part is true. The meher is supposed to be something the guy can afford and is not burdensome on him. The price the woman is asking for maybe ridiculous and silly but the meher is not a silly tradition, it's part of our diin.