Ladies: What does it take to make u 2nd wife

[AbdiWahab252]

A friend of mine is trying to get a 2nd wife because his wife is barren and has only had 1 daughter after nearly 20 years of marriage. After much testing and $$$, she is unable to conceive with the fault being hers. He know wants a 2nd wife but one who is proven birther aka a single mother garoob. This dude is well established, makes good money and is very pious but his game is WEAK. So he finally convinced his wife to allow him to take on a 2nd and has been looking for one. However, few single mothers want to be 2nd wives and he isn't good at making a case. He instead asks relatives, friends to help him out with mixed results.

So ladies, what would it take to make you a 2nd wife ? Is it money ? Is it companionship ? How about being a "kept" woman without a need to work again ?

I told this brother back in 2000 to cut his losses, divorce his wife and start a new life. No reason to torment her with the notion of a 2nd woman lurking and all the insecurities but the dude is selfish. She could have restarted her life without any baggage and there is a demand for women who don't want/can not have children out there.

[kambuli]

First don't advice anyone to divorce his wife unless she is a wacko person who bothers her husband. It is not the doing of her not to be able to conceive. So this should not be a punishable crime. Which the punishment is sharing her with another wife. If the situation was reversed and the husband was the one who couldn't make babies I am sure the wife would have stayed with him no matter what. So tell that guy(your friend) to stay with his wife...

[misterioso]

AbdiWahab252, I agree with kambuli not to advise or help a husband to divorce his wife. Don't plant the idea in his mind; let it come from within himself.

[Twist]

First don't advice anyone to divorce his wife unless she is a wacko person who bothers her husband. It is not the doing of her not to be able to conceive. So this should not be a punishable crime. Which the punishment is sharing her with another wife. If the situation was reversed and the husband was the one who couldn't make babies I am sure the wife would have stayed with him no matter what. So tell that guy(your friend) to stay with his wife...

Great point!


Abdow, if he has one daughter from his wife and they have been together for 20 years I don't know what his problem is. If he has been married for 20 years he's around 40 (may be few years younger or older) so marrying at that age & dealing with babies would be the last thing I would do, plus the fact that he has got a wife and daughter already.


But, since the question was for the sisters I would leave the discussion for them.

[afisoone]

Advice him to go to Syria and join Hesbul shaydaan. They have very beautiful obedient ladies. They are so many out there in Hisbul shaydaan.

[BlackVelvet]

Most girls say that not being able to have any kids is the only reason they would be okay with a second wife but in reality that has to be the hardest and worst reason - plain masochistic.

[FarhanYare]

[InaSamaale]

I would willingly be a second wife to someone who has

The character of 'umar ibn khattab
The generosity of uthman ibn affan
The bravery of khaled bin waleed
The wealth of abdirahman bin awf
The knowledge of ibn abbas

See, that is all that it would take

As for ur friend gd luck to him tough situation

[grandpakhalif]

I would willingly be a second wife to someone who has

The character of 'umar ibn khattab
The generosity of uthman ibn affan
The bravery of khaled bin waleed
The wealth of abdirahman bin awf
The knowledge of ibn abbas

See, that is all that it would take

As for ur friend gd luck to him tough situation

And are you Aisha(ra)?

[InaSamaale]

I don't think I am, far from it. Those are my conditions for being number 2. Was just answering the OPs question.

[AbdiWahab252]

Kambuli,

Fertility is something important. God forbid I was infertile, I would not wish my wife to stick around if we can not conceive. I have told him NOT to pursue a 2nd wife as it is too hard and complicated rather having a fresh start.

Misterio,

The 1st wife won't want a 2nd wife. There will be future conflict among the two Bahs and so its much easier to have a fresh start.

Twist,

Procreation is not a priority for all of us. Yet this man has the qualities of being a good father. sadly, it is those who are NOT qualified to be fathers who just have the luck to breed

BlackVelvet,

Yet, why lock yourself into a relationship knowing that you can not provide your husband with his desire to have more children. Personally, its just much easier to have divorced after the 5th year with no child and to start a fresh. There are brothers out there who are looking for women who can not conceive.

InSomalia,

You are young. You are hot. You are in demand. You are desired. Life is grand. But darling, know when to cash out at your prime

[misterioso]

Fertility is something important. God forbid I was infertile, I would not wish my wife to stick around if we can not conceive.

So what if you're infertile? It won't be the end of the world. You can adopt an orphan or two. Fatherhood isn't about biology. I'm sure you've observed many who failed fatherhood. For instance, Menace2Society fathered a number of illegitimate children; he isn't bothered by what he has done nor about their future or accountability in aakhiro. Also, there are many who were infertile but left their mark and a good legacy in this world.

[Lillaahiya]

Ignorance, cause I sure as hell wouldn't become a second if I know there's another.

[Tuushi]

Last think a "kept woman" wants is a child.

Do the children have to be his flesh and blood? I am sure he can be a father to many children who need in one in their lives.

He can try to buy a young bride from Africa is he is well off.

[Twist]

Last think a "kept woman" wants is a child.

Do the children have to be his flesh and blood? I am sure he can be a father to many children who need in one in their lives.

He can try to buy a young bride from Africa is he is well off.